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Marieta Reeks

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Aug 5, 2024, 12:57:27 AM8/5/24
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Focuson the Family is a huge supporter of Emerson Eggerich and and the contents of his book Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs. This organization regularly features Eggerich on their broadcasts and recommends his book.

I have long been aware of Emerson Eggerich and his book, Love and Respect. However, I disagree with the trajectory of what he has to say, finding that his binary approach to emotional needs and gender to be simplistic. I am even more alarmed how his views could contribute to further abuse in marriage. He appears to lay the blame on women for the problems that crop up in a marriage while the husband is viewed as being honorable and misunderstood.


I had not found an opportunity to discuss my concerns about Eggerich until Sheila Gregoire decided to focus on Focus on the Family and Eggerich. She has done the work and I find myself agreeing with her concerns. So, I will let her do the talking and let you see how Focus on the Family is dealing with her concerns


I have just finished a massive, comprehensive survey of more than 22,000 Christian women, asking over 150 questions about their marital and sexual satisfaction. In that survey, I left open-ended questions where people could name resources that helped their marriages and those which harmed their marriages. I did not list any resources; people volunteered them on their own.


Readers pay attention to the language employed by FOF which appears to paint Sheila as a person who is engaged in a one woman campaign against FOF/Eggerich at the beginning of their letter. They then give us a clue about the monetary ties to Eggerich.


It appears that FOF is going to war since they are the ones responsible for introducing this material to the Christian world. It is my opinion that there will be no apologies forthcoming. Their motives are clearly mixed in this business enterprise.


As a ministry with more than 40 years of history invested in helping marriages thrive and equipping both husbands and wives to embrace the gift of marriage as God designed it, Focus carefully reviews every resource we offer. We hear daily from women who have endured rejection and abuse even within the context of Christian marriage and would categorically reject any book that would justify or perpetuate such behavior.


The fact of the matter is that we believe Mrs. Gregoire has seriously misread and misjudged various aspects of Love & Respect, and we further maintain that its central message aligns both with Scripture and with the common-sense principles of healthy relationships. Even 16 years after its release, Focus continues to hear from numerous couples who enthusiastically testify to the positive transformation Love & Respect has brought to their marriages.


It is proper internet etiquette to link to that which you are critiquing. The fact that Focus on the Family refrains from linking to me shows that they are concerned that if people read what I have said, I may persuade them.


I encourage Focus on the Family to care for those who are harmed by this book. Listen to their voices (and many are in the comments in my open letter). Your inaction is showing where your priorities lie, and showing that you are not a safe resource for women or marriage..


Perhaps corporations like FotF (profit-making or otherwise) should direct the generic man who cannot control his appetites (but very gently and carefully, lest he feel disrespected and be compelled through no fault of his own to fly into a rage and hit someone), towards those christians who are gay, and celibate. He should sit at their feet, submit to their godly oversight and biblical bible teaching, and biblically follow their biblical example of self-control.


Investigative reporter Julie Roys has this article about the organizations claiming to be churches: -focus-on-the-family-bgea-rzim-churches-and-should-they-be-exempt-from-reporting-salaries-of-executives/


My wife will probably get a kick out of hearing about this article because she was the person in our relationship who was able to see through the hurtful nonsense in Love & Respect when we did the class at the church we were attending at the time.


The reason their doctrine is more important than women is because their doctrine defends their power, authority, and control. Another reason is because their doctrine makes them lots of money that also shores up their power and control.


They are foolish Galatians/Complementarians who have been bewitched by their own hunger for power and who try to bewitch others, laying heavy burdens on them that they are not willing to lift a finger to help. They are blind guides leading the blind. And they are upset that the seeing are calling out their blindness.


If the need, desire, whatever you call, it is based in selfishness and something dysfunctional, you are rewarding bad behavior and legitimizing troubled thinking that needs to be confronted, not supported.


Bunsen Honeydew: conservative Evangelicalism can be so unkind to Christian professing LGBTQ people, being absolute that desires for intimacy be contained, with zero compassion over human desire for intimate companionship


I am a flaming heterosexual single Christian woman, and I too have unfulfilled desires for intimacy. The only difference between me and a Christian professing LGBTQ person is that I have a (vanishingly small) chance of actually having an opportunity to have my desires fulfilled in a legitimate, God-honoring fashion. In truth, though, there just are not a whole lot of eligible single decent Christian men in my demographic, so I give myself about the same chances as those of a snowball in a traditionally warm place.


First, he humiliates his wife in private by letting her know how little he missed her. Then he humiliates her on a massive public scale by publishing the story of how he finally put her in her place.


I remember that story, now that you brought it up. Her husband made a decision to sell the house and move into a camper trailer after the second child. They then move back into a new home, Andrea is checked into a residential treatment facility. Then he pulls her out, they tell him no more children. Then he pushes for child three.


re: the 99, the lost: neither wartburg watch, dee, nor anyone else can be all things to all people & meet every need. in the limited resources of time & energy which we allot to this or that, we choose what needs we meet, what purposes we help fulfill.


If you want to be heard you have to give people a reason to hear you, and you have to make yourself understandable. Otherwise you are just noise, no matter how important or profound your message might be.


As opposed to getting drawn in with kindness and emotions only to see a flip? Or being stuck because of finances and kids? Or being afraid to leave because of abuse and the possibility of retribution?


I keep seeing parallels between Biblical Counseling and Scientology Dianetic Auditing, not the least of which is both have a Grand Unified Conspiracy Theory about that EEEVIL Secular Psychology. (Such Grand Unified Conspiracy Theory regarding EEEVIL mainstream medicine is one of the main tropes of Quackery.)


I am very skeptical that this is true. More common than materials from Lysa TerKeurst, Andy Stanley, Beth Moore, Max Lucado, Kyle Idleman, Priscilla Shirer, John MacArthur, Adam Hamilton, Elizabeth George, and Louie Giglio? Or, even if this was limited to marriage books, more common than Gary Thomas, Gary Chapman, Townsend and Cloud, or the Raineys? I can find nothing to suggest your claim is likely to be true. Please provide evidence.


On February 27, 2017, our son Mac joined the team at Gary Sinise Foundation as our Assistant Manager of Education & Outreach. I was thrilled and excited to have him come on board to help me with the mission. His job duties included handling and digitizing our Gary Sinise Foundation archive and managing our Education & Outreach Center, which included hosting events, giving tours, stewarding donors, and outreach with the military service members, veterans, first responders and families who were recipients of our support. With his engaging and upbeat personality, he inspired folks through our Gary Sinise: A Call-to-Action exhibit in the Education & Outreach Center, and he assisted in everyday activities, and local and national events also. As a father, having him as part of the Foundation was a gift. He was a great representative who cared about the mission and those we serve, and I was eager to watch him grow with the organization.


I was always happy to have him join me on the road, and I could see how much joy and pride he shared in our mission. Especially when he could be hands-on with those we serve, like at our Soaring Valor events honoring our nation's WWII heroes, and our Invincible Spirit Festivals, where we bring the Lt. Dan Band to uplift our wounded at military hospitals across the country.


Mac had been playing drums since he was nine years old and was an exceptional drummer. He would substitute for my drummer, Danny Gottlieb, when Danny was unavailable to play our Lt. Dan Band shows. Those were some great times, father and son rockin' out together for the troops.


The summer of 2018 was a particularly challenging time for our family. In June of that year, my wife Moira was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer, and after surgery to remove lymph nodes, she began chemotherapy and radiation. Then, on August 8th, we found out that Mac was diagnosed with a very rare cancer called Chordoma. What was happening? What is Chordoma? I had never heard of this. And two cancer patients, mother and son, within two months of each other? A real punch in the gut. I went online to see what I could find. Chordoma is a one in a million cancer. Originating in the spine, Chordoma affects, on average, only 300 people in the U.S. per year. In 70% of the cases the initial tumor can be removed, and it is cured. But in 30% of the cases, perhaps about 90 people per year, the cancer returns.

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