The Coffeeshop Hobo / Coffeeshop Hopping (an Initial Cluster of Coffeeshop Stories)

[Victoria "Stokastika"]

I think "Coffeeshop Hobo" needs to be a new term in the English
Dictionary because it is nevertheless an American Subculture, if not a
culture on its own (culture defined as an interactive,semi-discrete
assemblage of human and environmental factors). There should be a song
devoted to Coffeeshop Hobo, and I will eventually take the initiative
to write it. I hypothesize that the "Coffeeshop Hobo" concept emerged
ever since the proliferation of the Starbucks Corporation, which I am
in part thankful for. I went to Greece during summer of 1998 and
thoroughly enjoyed the notion of local hang-out coffee shops, pastry
shops, and submarine-sandwich stations. When I returned home to
Riverside, I dreamt of one day being a part of a country that had a
place where I could study outside the house, as well as a place to
meet and hang out with friends, that didn't necessarily have to be
associated with alcohol or drugs... and then the first Starbucks
coffeeshop came to down, off of University Ave, by the Cinemastar
movie theater. And then... people started to invade the coffeeshop,
especially the youth culture.... And more Starbucks houses sprouted
over the year like some prominent invasive flower in a field of
decaying, colorful native species of businesses.

I first discovered the notion of Coffeeshop Hobo about a week before
school started, in September of 2008. Nearly every day I would work in
rotating coffee shops, ranging from Starbucks to Coffee Bean to Java
Jones, even transporting myself to Kinkos, dispersed around Goleta and
downtown Santa Barbara. Most of the coffeeshop houses were rather
barren. Goleta was essentially a ghost town the week before school
started. And this is the first time when I encountered certain
individuals--routinely--and then I saw this guy--a scraggly-looking
gray-haired, homeless-like individual with potential brilliance (he's
left handed, I noticed), who could pass off as the Mad Scientist from
Back to the Future--I saw this characters about five times in three
days, within three different coffee shops, and THAT really started to
bug me. I coined this guy, as well as a suite of other peculiar,
scraggly looking "geeky homeless" folks as Coffeeshop Hobos. And then
it hit me, as soon as I returned home to greet my housemates Kyle,
Karl, and Lisa, I admitted out loud in part prideful shame: "I think I
am a Coffeeshop Hobo." Karl perked up in insightful humor, "So,
Victoria, how do you feel about your realization of this new
identity?" And I retorted, "I don't know. I feel... confused. But
mostly, I feel... frustrated... that I am seeing the same people all
the time. Repetition bugs the shxt out of me... unless I have
changed... or the system has changed... and my perception of the
system has changed. Otherwise, I am trying to avoid my life from
becming a Broken Record." Karl reponded, "So, you fear repetition?"
And I continued, "I fear repetitition greatly. I need to live my life
non-linearly. I tried to live like a machine. I fell into the trap of
repetition. And it was taking me to my deathbed at too early of an
age."

Okay... so we're getting a little too deep and existential here, so
let's move on to the next conversation.

Last summer, through my Coffeeshop Hobo tendencies, I met about 20
people. Among them were a geography Ph.D. student, a schoolteacher who
used to be a construction worker and is a son of an MD (therefore I
received a long lecture on why I should not consume pink or blue-
packet sugar-free sugar), Drs. John Toobey and Leda Cosmides (and
their little girl) (come on, you don't know who they are?!! They're
Evolutionary Psychologists! Ultimate!), a brilliant, young musician
who is entirely socially inept (it was a struggle to get a one-minute
conversation out of him), and a womanizing architect who was
attempting to pick up students 30 years younger his age, even though
he has two kids, one of them going to UCSB. Right. So... coffeeshops
contain a very intriguing cast of characters. It's fantastically
mortifying. I very much enjoy the notion of building a local
community. Getting to know the local essence of a place. I didn't even
need to necessarily interact directly with people--just even overhear
their conversations. I especially felt a sense of community during the
GAP fire in July of 2008. There were a lot of people huddling and
hanging out of coffeeshops, while their cars were stuffed with
valuables. Such a disaster really forces people to come together in
ways they usually don't.

It's a wonderful endeavor-errr hobby--to get to know the local
community through coffeeshop hopping, but there is also a trade-off.
As I have learned not to become too close to little kids, because they
leech onto you like superglue if you show any signs of consistent
trust and intercativity, and it's difficult to ween them off unless
you go through spatial re-location (Spring of 2001, Goleta California
and Spring of 2002, Monteverde Costa Rica), I have also come to learn
it's not a good idea to become too attached to Coffeeshop Hobos. Many
of them are very interesting and you can end up talking to them for
hours. The cost of Intensive Lively Conversation and relatively deep
emotional bonding is the inability to study. You have achieved in
transforming the Coffeeshop for Study into the Hanging out at Your
Friend's House.

I have achieved such a saturation point of friendship--or I have made
the mistake of acquiring great friendship--with the Coffeeshop Hobos
of Mojo Coffee in Goleta, California. I could say there are five
routine players, in which I am in great terms with two of them. One
guy, Richard (a very intelligent, former mechanic who was injured,
lost his best friend--a dog--and lives out of his truck), builds and
flies his own model airplanes, and has a rather intense computer game
for a training program before flying his planes out in the field.
There was another character in the house--who shall remain nameless
here--who was getting so chummy with me that he was willing to share
weed with me out in the back. I think I reached a Tipping Point upon
that offer, and I hadn't shown up to Mojo Coffee ever since. Not that
I am anti-weed at all! My neighbor is a Weed Doctor, which means he
presribes weed for medical purposes, like relieving pain and lowering
stress and anxiety levels. I prefer Hemp over Alcohol, actually! But I
am Pro-Getting-My-Work-Done-Not-Mediated-By-Weed.

So, taking a step back from Mojo Coffee, I have learned not to make
this mistake of becoming too chummy with the Coffeeshop Hobos again. I
must overall stay at a friendly distance if I want to maintain these
coffeeshops as Public Work Spaces. Coffeeshops will otherwise remain
wonderful arenas for people-watching.

Though it is a tricky endeavor to befriend other fellow Coffeeshop
Hobos, I think it is relatively SAFE to bond to the EMPLOYEES of the
coffeeshop. You can have relatively brief, yet intensely meaningful
conversations with them during moments of deadness and breaks, but in
the end, they have to get back to work, and then you are safe to go
back to work.

I am actually most proud to be a Coffeeshop Hobo of the Starbucks at
the corner of Iowa and Blaine in Riverside, California. I have
befriended a large part of the Barista Crew, simply because they are
beyond numerical entities to serve a greater corporate machine, but
they are actually a missing series of episodes of Saturday Night Live.
There is a sitcom going on behind the counter, and it is just a kick
to observe--as well as occasionally be a part of the show. And the
presence of Free Entertainment has enhanced my studying, as well as
making my $1.95 cup of coffee (with 50-cent refills of course) really
worth its value. The Corporate Matrix of America was dissolved--
weathered away by this original set of characters as it started to
take form of a unique, localized Microcosm that could embody a lost
spirit of humanity. Honestly, I think Hollywood screenwriters need to
get their ROYAL xsses down here, buy some coffee... and just OBSERVE.

The assemblage of a set of strong-personalities with viciously unique
streaks--which I primarily noticed through the presence of William, a
young, spunky, hilariously intuitive and skeptical student of African
descent who lectured me on the difference between a late and a
macciato, all crammed within 2.5 minutes. As in the end, I nodded my
head in understanding, "Oh, so like making coffee is like how outcrops
in geology ared formed. It's all about sequencing in the layers." And
his eyes twinkled behind the slight tint of his glasses (slightly
curly hair): "Exactly." Then I started noticing this vibe and dynamic
among all the Barista members. One guy was even willing to lecture me
on where all the coffee comes from--and I politely asked him to save
that for next quarter, when I can really sink my teeth into the issue.

William--and all the employees are super polite--in a very GENUINE
SENSE--and it's almost like there's some kind of intense, motivating
competition on who's the Nicest, Coolest Barista of Starbucks of the
Universe of Blaine and Iowa. I've gotten my fair share of free samples
of cookies and pastries and uniquely-flavored lunch items, even sneaks
of a couple extra pumps of sugar-free Caramel syrup. Today, the day
after Thanksgiving, I am staring at a sample of a whole cookie, not
1/10th of it. I am very impressed by their generosity. One time, a
sample from William convinced me to purchase a Pumpkin-Spice
Frappucino.

I also enjoy the ambiance of this Starbucks simply by the passing of a
set individuals who I know very well, but I could not classify as
Coffeeshop Hobos--they are mostly my former peer Earth Science
graduate students and professors, ranging from Greg Lawson,
hydrologist, to Tim Lyons, Sarah Simpson, Mary Droser and her daughter
Emi. Maybe even Martin and Eva, one time? Lately, I have been so glad
to see them, because I am finally acquiring and appreciating a geology
hat ever since I returned to Santa Barbara for schooling, and ever
since my grandfather passed. And the whole hard-drive of his memory--a
conglomeration of emotions, mental images, now for me to imagine with
the fragments that remain. Since his Ecological Reincarnation into the
San Gabriel Mountains (eventually to be feeding into a sugar or
ponderosa pine) and remaining Open Landscapes of early 20th century
California, I have vowed to myself to dissolve all failures and
elements of divisiveness in my mind and to mentally embrace the
landscapes and knowledge of my grandfather, to which most of society
has lost--the thorough geology and climate and vegetation of a region,
the ability to build a cabin in the mountain with a small team of
friends, hiking and experiencing the remains of the Wild, the human-
untouched.

Since this has happened, my perspectives of my supposed failed past
has metamorphosed into an eager, sponged absorption and desperate
seeking of resolution through knowledge acquisition and experience. I
have leeched to my granduncle Dwight as a surrogate grandfather, and I
look into my geology professors--my father's colleagues, directly into
their eyes in yearning and in thankfulness, rather in self-perceived
failure. When genetic family passes, the only family I will have left
is my Intellectual Family.

And thankfully I get to see them frequently given my strategic
position at the Blaine-Iowa Starbucks, as a dignified signature
Coffeeshop Hobo.

Follow up later:
**the Psychology of Interior Design of Coffeeshop Houses, optimizing
(1) in-and-out coffeeshoppers compromising (2) sit-down coffeeshoppers
for (a) studying (make them comfortable, but not too comfortable, to
enhance studying, but make sure they don't end up studying and taking
up space all day) and (b) socializing--more circular, oriental, seats
more comfortable and facing inward.
**the Adaptive Grid Model and the Invasion of Study Niche Space--you
cannot invade a new niche space if pre-existing space is already
occupied. Fierce indirect competition of human beings in a Coffeeshop
of limited seating. But there is enough succession and overturn that
the likelihood of acquiring a study seat is high at least if you wait
for an hour. Tricks of creating niche spaces through furniture re-
arrangements and placing chairs and tables closer to electrical
outlets of computer usage.
**the Philosophy of Tinted Windows: (1) besides pragmatic use--
preventing too much sunlight for coming into the house (2) enhanced
reflection in the evening enables intense, indirect window-mediated
people-watching. For example, guy-girl watching.
**the Ergonomics of Coffeeshop Houses: how the first design of chairs
destroyed my back (I'm too tall for my own good), and how I had to use
my computer bag to maintain health and sanity of a pinching nerve and
disturbed vertebrae of my back
**Political Ecology of Coffee--where coffee comes from, where coffee
goes... a global affair, my housemate Julie wants me to do something
about that for my research... he he he...
**Controversy of Reality and Media Reality: Symbolic Legitimacy of
Mitigation, bulldoze a rainforest for a coffee plantation but
advertise viciously the restoration of 2 acres of rainforest, 12
Starbucks customers shipped to Costa Rica to restore a rainforest,
makeup land-use alteration with disproportional media advertisement of
such a venture.
**Corporate Convention to have an Environmental Division, at least in
moral value, I have seen, but the question is, WHY? Forced out of
Mitigation of evil-doings, they have to create an Environmental
Division? In terms of Value Systems, they are heavily media-ized, but
in terms of the operations of their company, and how their value
systems are reflected in their budgets and business practices, that is
a whole other story. e.g. Donald Bren School originated from
Mitigation Money? Same from Environmental Studies Department? Oh
gosh... so sad....
**this can be a TOTAL EXTENSION of Coffee and Cigarettes, series of
vignettes, conversations with people.
**the LIFE OF A CCS STUDENT: coffeeshop hopping, bar hopping,
department-hopping, and school-hopping, a form of controlled ADHD.
**Starbucks Food: Fancy-Wrapped Airplane Food--that is actually Non-
poisonous (my parents and I have puked and gotten sick on airplane
food).