Excellent advice of a Senior Sheikh,
Mufti Ahmed Khanpuri (one of the leading contemporary
Ulama) advises in one of his talks,
"Why is it
that we don't find books on child upbringing (tarbiyatul awlaad) among the
earlier authors?
He says:
"It's because it was not taken as a subject then, a topic to write about.
Tarbiyat (child training/upbringing/nurturing/teaching etiquettes/manners) was natural. Parents used to do it. It's
similar to cooking. We don't find any cookery books among them either, because
they didn't take it as a subject to write about. It was natural and girls learnt
it in homes.
Today Ulama
have to write such books, because we want the Ustaaz / Teacher to do everything.
We have no time for our kids. We will have time for our friends and for our
hobbies. We will be prepared to spend money on educating children. But in all
cases we are handing them over to others, whereas we ourselves should be very
cautious with regards to their tarbiyat. We need to take out at least half an
hour a day for our kids. Start doing this and see the rewards at the end of the
year.
He went on
to say: "Two things are most damaging for children's spiritual upbringing,
1.
Haraam income
2.
Bad company
Many people
are not careful about their income, while for bad company, people provide tv's
(computers, smart phones) and so on in their kids bedrooms and they have all the
bad company you can think of. Then how could you expect them to become Junaid
Baghdadees, Imam Bukharees ?
He goes on
to say: "Be very careful with regards to your children. Give themthe best tarbiyat you can." Do not cry when
its too late !
May
Allah give us the ability to nurture our children properly and to fulfil
this duty which Allah has fixed upon us.