A Washington , DC , airport ticket agent
Offers some examples
Of why our country is in trouble!
1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!)
2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information. Then she interrupted me with, 'I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts ' Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained, 'Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa .' She responded by hanging up.
3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, 'Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!'
4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, 'Is it possible to see England from Canada ?' I said, 'No.' She said, 'But they look so close on the map.'
5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car he said, 'I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time.'
6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 am and got to Chicago at 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went really fast, and she bought that.
7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, 'Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom? ' I said, 'No, why do you ask?' She replied, 'Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said 'FAT', and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude!' After putting her on hold for a minute while I looked into it (I was laughing), I came back and explained the city code for Fresno, CA is 'FAT' (Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a Destination tag on her luggage.
8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost info, she asked, 'Would it be cheaper to fly to California , and then take the train to Hawaii ?'
9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, 'How do I know which plane to get on?' I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, ' I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them.'
10. A lady Senator called and said, 'I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?' I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola , Fl. On a commuter plane. She said, 'Yeah, Whatever, smarty!'
11. A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China . After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. 'Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those.' I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, 'Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!'
12. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, 'I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York .' I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, 'Are you sure that's the name of the town?' 'Yes, what flights do you have?' replied the lady. After some searching, I came back with, 'I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere.' The lady retorted, 'Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!' So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, 'You don't mean Buffalo , do you?' The reply: Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.'
Now you know why the Government
Is in the shape that it's in.
