How would you answer this note...?

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Maria Marsala, Motivational Speaker, Business Strategist, Author

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Mar 8, 2009, 6:53:33 PM3/8/09
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I received the note below from a VP of a very profitable Bank.  In my 10 years in business I have met with a LOT of bankers, including business development bankers, personal bankers and managers and have received -0- business.  They either do their own “consulting” in house OR send folks to SBA and Score and don’t want to recommend any specific business owners.

 

So I’m curious as to how would you would answer the note he sent me?   I already did answer it after calming down, and I’m sure this will NOT be the last time I’ll be asked to speak for free from a “for profit” entity who doesn’t value their friends, customers or speakers!

 

Thanks in advance…

 

---------------------------------------------

 

I talked to you about a few years ago and I am on your e-mail list.   We are having a one day retreat for our 22 branch operations managers at the NAME OF RETREAT CENTER  -- 4 HOURS DRIVE one-way  FROM WHERE I LIVE.

 

They asked if I could find a friend or customer who could join me to talk for 45 minutes from 12:45-1:30pm about “Coaching/Mentoring Employees”.   I know you do this for a living but their idea was not to pay someone so I am thinking about someone who might want to help and maybe the exposure would be good.  I thought about you.

 

Is that something you would be interested in doing or would you know someone who has the time that might want to do that?   Another idea might be to show a short video about coaching?

 

VP name here.

 

Raeleen D'Agostino Mautner, Ph.D.

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Mar 8, 2009, 7:43:19 PM3/8/09
to prosp...@googlegroups.com, Maria Marsala, Motivational Speaker, Business Strategist, Author
Maria,
 
I have never been able to make a living as a speaker--and it is not for lack of speaking engagements but because of the rudenes of people who expect speaking should be a free service because you get "exposure" in return. When I request a fee I have had people make me feel like I ought to be ashamed of myself for asking. I personally am sick of it and I now tell them "thanks for the thought but I can't live on "exposure".
 
Good luck!
--
Raeleen D'Agostino Mautner, Ph.D.
Life Coach, Trainer & Consultant
The Resiliency Training and Coaching Institute
Member of the International Coaching Federation
(ICF)
www.dolcevitaseminars.com
 
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DeBorah Beatty

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Mar 8, 2009, 8:11:20 PM3/8/09
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I would tell them something to the effect,

"I really wish I could help you, but I'm booked solid with paying clients right now, perhaps your local church or business school might have a person who might have some ideas to share. As you say you value my input, I would recommend that if you want to make the sort of improvements we spoke of in our conversation yesterday at the branch level (hence with all the 22 branch operations managers), I would suggest you make the investment for a paid speaker who can deliver the kind of program you're looking for.  As you are well aware, cutting corners never pays off in the long run.

Now, if you'd like to explore using my services, I will be glad to provide my rate sheet for your perusal.  By the way, I am now booking for (whatever is 6 months out from now). Let me know if you'd like to get on my schedule."

'Nuff said.




Raeleen D'Agostino Mautner, Ph.D. wrote:
Maria,
 
I have never been able to make a living as a speaker--and it is not for lack of speaking engagements but because of the rudenes of people who expect speaking should be a free service because you get "exposure" in return. When I request a fee I have had people make me feel like I ought to be ashamed of myself for asking. I personally am sick of it and I now tell them "thanks for the thought but I can't live on "exposure".
 
Good luck!
--
Raeleen D'Agostino Mautner, Ph.D.
Life Coach, Trainer & Consultant
The Resiliency Training and Coaching Institute
Member of the International Coaching Federation
(ICF)
www.dolcevitaseminars.com
 
-------------- Original message from "Maria Marsala, Motivational Speaker, Business Strategist, Author" <theresou...@gmail.com>: --------------

I received the note below from a VP of a very profitable Bank.  In my 10 years in business I have met with a LOT of bankers, including business development bankers, personal bankers and managers and have received -0- business.  They either do their own “consulting” in house OR send folks to SBA and Score and don’t want to recommend any specific business owners.

 

So I’m curious as to how would you would answer the note he sent me?   I already did answer it after calming down, and I’m sure this will NOT be the last time I’ll be asked to speak for free from a “for profit” entity who doesn’t value their friends, customers or speakers!

 

Thanks in advance…

 

---------------------------------------------

 

I talked to you about a few years ago and I am on your e-mail list.   We are having a one day retreat for our 22 branch operations managers at the NAME OF RETREAT CENTER  -- 4 HOURS DRIVE one-way  FROM WHERE I LIVE.

 

They asked if I could find a friend or customer who could join me to talk for 45 minutes from 12:45-1:30pm about “Coaching/Mentoring Employees”.   I know you do this for a living but their idea was not to pay someone so I am thinking about someone who might want to help and maybe the exposure would be good.  I thought about you.

 

Is that something you would be interested in doing or would you know someone who has the time that might want to do that?   Another idea might be to show a short video about coaching?

 

VP name here.

 




-- 
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DeBorah Beatty
The "Created Life" Coach
Accredited NAOFP Mentor

DEBORAHBEATTY.COM

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Allen Klein

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Mar 8, 2009, 9:20:26 PM3/8/09
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I've made a very good living from speaking for the past twenty years.

Some organizations have money for speakers, some don't. Find those
that do and forget the rest.

Allen Klein, MA, CSP
author of The Healing Power of Humor (www.allenklein.com)
200 Lifetime Achievement Award recipient from the Assn for Applied & Therapeutic Humor (www.aath.org)

Blaire Borthayre

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Mar 8, 2009, 10:17:24 PM3/8/09
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Maria

I think you know what you have to say here....
“Sorry I cannot help you, bullshit bullshit but good luck with your search bullshit bullshit”.

What you are really asking is whether or not there is a way to tell this guy off in a professional way.  The answer is no.

This is the guy that talks really loud on his cellphone and has no clue that he is irritating everyone around him.  He is oblivious to glares, sighs or even mumbling under your breath.   You fantasize that a well worded retort will put him in his  place and show him how oblivious he has been to the needs of those around him.

 

I have never suffered fools very well and this has been my downfall.  I can tell you from personal experience that I have taken many opportunities to express my disdain with men like your  banker.  I have often couched it in “professional courtesy” verbage but nevertheless, my intent was obvious just underneath the surface.

 

So I can tell you with one hundred percent certainty that it has almost always been a mistake.  Even though you may never get any business from this banker, burning bridges always comes back to haunt you.  Complain to your friends, to members of this group, to your pets but not to the banker.  Right now he is someone who may be ignorant about speaker fees or may be tight with his money but he does think well of you.  Let’s keep it that way. 

 

Write him a note back and resist the temptation to lecture, teach him a lesson, upbraid him, etc...

“Thanks for thinking of me.  Unfortunately I am not a position where I can afford to speak for free.  In fact,  I cannot think of anyone who is at the moment.

Good luck with your search.  If your budget changes, you may be interested in a one hour speech that I do on this very topic entitled “ Mentoring Employees in a Banking Environment“ (Make sure the topic is customized to fit his needs exactly)  This one hour speech give you three behaviors to avoid at all costs, Four statements that will endear your staff to you... blah blah blah and the cost is _____________.”

 

Believe it or not, I have actually gotten the paying event because they come back to the email after being turned down over and over for a free speaker.  Either way, I dont have an enemy and if he ever does get some money, he may very well contact me.  And if he doesn’t, no harm no foul.

Saludos,

 

Blaire Borthayre

Hispanic Marketing Resources

www.Hispanicmarketingresources.com

(919) 854-7887

(919) 801-1468 cell

LillyW

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Mar 9, 2009, 9:03:55 AM3/9/09
to Professional Speaker to Speaker
I also suggest they can find free speakers by looking at teachers
from the local JC, Toastmasters, or their local government.

They normally come back with, "But we wanted someone who has more
experience in speaking to the corporate world."

"Well, those kinds of professional experts do not need the exposure,
and get paid for their time. But, really, if you don't have any
budget, consider the JC."

- Lilly Walters
909-398-1228
Author, with Dottie Walters of Speak and Grow Rich
http://www.paidpublicspeaking.com

Creator, Almanac and Directory of Speakers Bureaus and Lecture Agents
http://www.paidpublicspeaking.com

P.S. A speaking legend passed away after 50 years as a mentor to the
speaking industry.
See the story of Dottie Walters http://www.paidpublicspeaking.com/dottiewaltersstory.html

Lauren Pibworth

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Apr 1, 2009, 9:33:54 AM4/1/09
to Professional Speaker to Speaker
Hi Maria,

Do you have a contract that you traditionally use when you book a
paying gig? If so, I would have responded with the traditional "Thank
you for your interest. Although I am not in a position to offer my
services at no cost, please see the enclosed contract with my fees and
set up requirements. I would be happy to share my considerable
expertise at your conference as a valued contributor.

If you are only interested in free speakers, I suggest you try to
contact a local toastmasters and see if there is someone there who has
some knowledge on the topic and would like to practice their speaking
ability."

Lauren Pibworth
Administrative and Marketing Specialist to Speakers and Trainers
http://www.pibworthps.com



On Mar 9, 9:03 am, LillyW <lilly_walt...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> I also suggest they can find free speakers by looking at  teachers
> from the local JC,  Toastmasters, or their local government.
>
> They normally come back with, "But we wanted someone who has more
> experience in speaking to the corporate world."
>
> "Well, those kinds of professional experts do not need the exposure,
> and get paid for their time.  But, really, if you don't have any
> budget, consider the JC."
>
> - Lilly Walters
> 909-398-1228
> Author, with Dottie Walters of Speak and Grow Richhttp://www.paidpublicspeaking.com
>
> Creator, Almanac and Directory of Speakers Bureaus and Lecture Agentshttp://www.paidpublicspeaking.com
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