In her recent essay in The New York Times, Israeli mother Rachel Goldberg took my breath away. Her son, Hersh, is severely injured and currently being held captive in Gaza, and her words moved me so powerfully that I physically cut them out of the newspaper and glued them into my personal journal. They will be a part of me forever. She writes:
But, like Rachel Goldberg, the Talmud makes a radical and surprising move by expanding the cry of the shofar to include the tears of another mother. She is not one of our mothers, but the mother of Sisera, an enemy general.
One of my favorite books as a child was the classic by P.D. Eastman, Are You My Mother? It's the story of a baby bird who falls from his nest and goes in search of his mama. I would anxiously turn the pages as he asked a hound dog, an old car, and a host of other creatures and objects his soulful question: "Are you my mother?" As the little bird goes along searching, he passes right near his mother without being aware. The text reads: "He did not know what his mother looked like. He went right by her. He did not see her." Having met with disappointment and even danger again and again, at last he would find her on the very last page, just as my four-year-old heart was about to break from the suspense. Eastman wrote a book that appealed to an obvious truth: babies need mothers.
I'm now in my forties and a mother to four children who are almost grown. As I'm writing, they are all "out of the nest" for the week, and the unusual quiet orderliness of our house has felt like a foretaste of the next stage of life that is rushing toward me. To be honest, I'm not sure how I feel about it. Being the mama bird of this nest has consumed me for twenty years, and I have loved it. The term "empty nester" feels like an odd fit.
But I know better than to think that my mothering days are drawing to a close. I know this because God calls every believing woman to be a mother. Think about the command given to Adam and Eve in Genesis 1: Be fruitful and multiply. Fill the earth with more image bearers. The command to the first man and woman meant that they were to become parents in the literal sense. But in the New Testament, we find this command expressed also in spiritual terms in the Great Commission: Go to all nations and make disciples. Be fruitful and multiply. Fill the earth with more image bearers. But this time, the call is also to be spiritual parents, raising newborn believers to maturity, helping them conform to the image of Christ.
I know my mothering days are not over because, as long as I draw breath, the call to fill the earth with image bearers will be incumbent on me. Just as my biological children needed me to train them in self-control, industriousness, and obedience, so also do young believers in the church need those who are more mature to train them in godliness. Every believing woman who grows to maturity becomes, in her time, a spiritual mother to those following behind, whether she ever becomes a mom in physical terms. She fulfills that most basic calling of motherhood: nurturing the helpless and weak to maturity and strength. She helps the young believer to nurse on the pure milk of the Word, faithfully teaching basic doctrine and modeling the fruit of the Spirit. She sacrificially makes herself available, like the mother of a newborn infant, allowing her schedule and personal needs to be inconvenienced for the sake of caring for the spiritually young and vulnerable. And she understands the work to be not a trial but a sacred duty, finding deep delight in wobbly first steps of faithfulness and stuttered first words of truth.
But connecting spiritual infants to spiritual mamas is not always a smooth process. Like the baby bird in Eastman's book, fledgling Christians may not recognize a mama bird even when one is standing right in front of them. They may go right past her. They may ask, "Are you my mother?" of the wrong person and receive the answer, "Yes." Plenty of false teachers are eager to prey on young Christians not yet established in their faith. Younger men and women in the faith, do you recognize your need for the wisdom of a spiritual mother? Whom could you approach to help you grow to maturity in your relationship with God and others?
Not only may spiritual infants fail to recognize spiritual mamas, but spiritual mamas may fail to recognize themselves as such. We may underestimate the need or question our ability to meet it. Or we may hesitate to extend ourselves out of a fear of commitment. But a motherless church is as tragic as a motherless home. Guiding the spiritually young to maturity is not solely the job of the vocational pastor, the elder, or the Sunday school teacher. The church needs mothers to care for the family of God. We must rise to our responsibility, eagerly searching for whom the Lord would have us nurture. There is no barrenness among believing women. Through the gospel, all become mothers in their maturity. And unlike biological motherhood, spiritual motherhood holds the potential for hundreds, even thousands of descendants. Older women in the faith, do you recognize the vital importance of your in uence and example? Whom could you make room for in your life to guide toward maturity? Who needs the hard-earned wisdom you hold? Spiritual babies need help to open God's Word, to live at peace with God and others, to be lights in dark places. Babies need mothers.
It is the calling of every believing woman to submit to the command to be fruitful and multiply, to fill the earth with image bearers. This means that for us, the term empty nester can never truly be applied. There is comfort for me in knowing this truth as I watch my biological children grow up and leave home. I suspect and hope there is comfort in this truth for any believing woman, biological mother or not. None of us needs ever to question our usefulness in the household of God. We have only to draw the next searching fledgling under our wing.
A mother is the female parent of a child. A woman may be considered a mother by virtue of having given birth, by raising a child who may or may not be her biological offspring, or by supplying her ovum for fertilisation in the case of gestational surrogacy.
A biological mother is the female genetic contributor to the creation of the infant, through sexual intercourse or egg donation. A biological mother may have legal obligations to a child not raised by her, such as an obligation of monetary support. An adoptive mother is a female who has become the child's parent through the legal process of adoption. A putative mother is a female whose biological relationship to a child is alleged but has not been established. A stepmother is a non-biological female parent married to a child's preexisting parent, and may form a family unit but generally does not have the legal rights and responsibilities of a parent in relation to the child.
A father is the male counterpart of a mother. Women who are pregnant may be referred to as expectant mothers or mothers-to-be.[1][2] The process of becoming a mother has been referred to as "matrescence".[3]
Biological motherhood for humans, as in other mammals, occurs when a pregnant female gestates a fertilized ovum (the "egg"). A female can become pregnant through sexual intercourse after she has begun to ovulate. In well-nourished girls, menarche (the first menstrual period) usually takes place around the age of 12 or 13.[5]
Typically, a fetus develops from the viable zygote, resulting in an embryo. Gestation occurs in the woman's uterus until the fetus (assuming it is carried to term) is sufficiently developed to be born. In humans, gestation is often around 9 months in duration, after which the woman experiences labor and gives birth. This is not always the case, however, as some babies are born prematurely, late, or in the case of stillbirth, do not survive gestation. Usually, once the baby is born, the mother produces milk via the lactation process. The mother's breast milk is the source of antibodies for the infant's immune system, and commonly the sole source of nutrition for newborns before they are able to eat and digest other foods; older infants and toddlers may continue to be breastfed, in combination with other foods, which should be introduced from approximately six months of age.[6]
Childlessness is the state of not having children. Childlessness may have personal, social or political significance. Childlessness may be voluntary childlessness, which occurs by choice, or may be involuntary due to health problems or social circumstances. Motherhood is usually voluntary, but may also be the result of forced pregnancy, such as pregnancy from rape. Unwanted motherhood occurs especially in cultures which practice forced marriage and child marriage.
Mother can often apply to a woman other than the biological parent, especially if she fulfills the main social role in raising the child. This is commonly either an adoptive mother or a stepmother (the biologically unrelated partner of a child's father). The term "othermother" or "other mother" is also used in some contexts for women who provide care for a child not biologically their own in addition to the child's primary mother.
Adoption, in various forms, has been practiced throughout history, even predating human civilization.[7] Modern systems of adoption, arising in the 20th century, tend to be governed by comprehensive statutes and regulations. In recent decades, international adoptions have become more and more common.
Adoption in the United States is common and relatively easy from a legal point of view (compared to other Western countries).[8] In 2001, with over 127,000 adoptions, the US accounted for nearly half of the total number of adoptions worldwide.[9]
A surrogate mother is a woman who bears a child that came from another woman's fertilized ovum on behalf of a couple unable to give birth to children. Thus the surrogate mother carries and gives birth to a child that she is not the biological mother of. Surrogate motherhood became possible with advances in reproductive technologies, such as in vitro fertilization.
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