Fwd: Roche a Perdrix had a last laugh
Piotr Rajski
Great story, Boris. I'll post it on the blog some time after my return from Poland.
From: Grace Borun <graceborun...@gmail.com>
Date: Tue., Jun. 18, 2024, 20:12
Subject: Re: Roche a Perdrix had a last laugh
To: Boris Bokov <boris...@gmail.com>
Cc: Mike Alexander <mike...@gmail.com>, Roman Lipiecki <roman.l...@gmail.com>, Malgorzata Strozyk <malgorzat...@gmail.com>, Andrzej Jedrych <abje...@gmail.com>, Basia Walter <adamj...@gmail.com>, Ada Tai <adata...@gmail.com>, Piotr Zieliński <joann...@gmail.com>, Piotr Rajski <rajski...@gmail.com>
Dear All,It has been more than a week since our "epic" climb, and I finally found time to write a story about our attempt:(Thank you!)Roche a Perdrix: A Hilariously Brutal Scramble for Domination (and Maybe a Summit, If We're Lucky)
Starring:
Me: Intrepid leader, questionable decision-maker, and earplug enthusiast.
Ada: My partner-in-crime, ever-optimistic and a dab hand at backside descents.
Roman and Piotr: The dream duo with a luxurious new car (perfect for post-climb wallowing).
Beata and Andrzej: A power couple with a penchant for drama, great decision making ability (and questionable scree-climbing skills).
Grace, Gosia, Basia, and Mike: The rest of the magnificent eight plus two, all equally valiant and possibly slightly terrified.
Act I: The Fashionably Late Arrival
We rolled into the Roche a Perdrix trailhead like a ragtag bunch of superheroes, fashionably late (shocking, I know). Roman's new Toyota Highlander Hybrid gleamed in the morning light, a stark contrast to our dirt-encrusted boots and questionable fashion choices.
Andrzej, Beata, and Grace were already there, raring to go. Beata, bless her heart, looked like she might conquer Everest in a tutu, but the first obstacle – a slightly steep incline – had her rethinking her life choices. Thankfully, Andrzej, ever the supportive husband, took care of his wife.
Act II: The Scree-ing Chorus
The first hour was a breeze (literally, with the wind whipping through our hair). Then came the "real" hike, which everyone would soon discover was more of a "hold-my-beer-and-watch-this" scramble.
Beata, bless her again, became our very own scree-scaling speed bump. It was slow going, but hey, at least we got a built-in rest stop! After a series of near-death experiences (mostly involving loose rocks and questionable footing), we reached our first major obstacle – a mountain of scree so treacherous it could make a billy goat cry.
Grace, Gosia, and Ada, fearless warriors that they are, attacked it head-on. I, ever the resourceful leader, opted for a slightly less scree-filled route involving a healthy dose of snow-kicking (because who needs fancy ice axes when you have determination?).
Act III: Beata and the Breakup (with the Mountain, Not Andrzej)
Beata, bless her thrice, continued to slow things down. But hey, at least she was pushing her limits! Eventually, after a series of dramatic pauses and whispered conversations with Andrzej, she decided to call it quits on the summit push. We all secretly applauded her bravery (and maybe Andrzej's unwavering support).
The rest of us pressed on, battling scree, gullies, and the ever-encroaching clouds. Roman, bless him four times, even managed to lose a trekking pole in the process (because who needs two when you can have one and a spectacular one-handed descent?).
Act IV: The Summit... Almost?
The clouds rolled in, turning the climb into a slippery, treacherous mess. We reached a turning point – literally. The summit was shrouded in mist, the scree was a nightmare, and Beata's wise decision-making echoed in our minds. It was snowing.
A team meeting ensued, fueled by questionable snacks and even more questionable jokes. Grace, ever the voice of reason, pointed out that summiting might leave us stranded on the descent. Mike, bless him five times, seemed less than thrilled with the prospect of more climbing (and who could blame him?).
Act V: The Descent: A Symphony of Slips and Slides
With a heavy heart (but mostly a relieved bladder), I made the executive decision to turn back. The descent was a comical ballet of slips, slides, and near-misses. Ada, bless her six times, perfected the art of the backside descent, while Mike, bless him six times too, managed to send a rogue rock careening into Basia's leg (thankfully, just a bruise!).
Roman, bless him seven times (because come on, a broken hand?), took a tumble and managed to mangle his hand something fierce. Despite the mishaps, we all made it back to the trailhead in one (mostly) functional piece.
Act VI: The Feast of Champions (and Band-Aids)
Eleven hours, a mountain of scree, and a questionable number of near-death experiences later, we emerged victorious (and slightly traumatized). We celebrated with a well-deserved feast at a Greek restaurant, where the only thing more impressive than the portions was Roman's ability to down tequila with a broken hand.
The End: Roche a Perdrix 1, Puny Humans 0
Did we reach the summit? Nope. Did we learn a valuable lesson about listening to our bodies and the mountain? Absolutely. Did we have an epic adventure (with a few bumps and bruises along the way)? You bet we did!
And as for Roche a Perdrix? Let's just say the mountain won this round. But hey, there's always next time, right? Just maybe with a little less scree and a whole lot more ice axes. Until next time, Roche a Perdrix! You were a formidable opponent (and a great sensei according to my climbing philosophy).
On Mon, Jun 10, 2024 at 11:22 PM Boris Bokov <boris...@gmail.com> wrote:Dear All,Shared is "Roche a Perdrix had a last laugh" photo album depicting our June 8 adventures.The album is collaborative, so please add your photos, so that we can see it from 360 degrees angle.I am still sore today, my quads, and my triceps need more time to recover.It was 24 C in the Valley, so different from snow in Hinton.--
Anna Mateescu
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Krywaniu, Krywaniu, wysoookiii!!!
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MAREK KUCMIERZ
This mountain was simply to difficult for everybody and it should be taken into account for the next Rocky expedition
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