Fwd: : MARRIAGE GYAN

[Inderpal Singh Anand]

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Raghbir Arora <brc...@att.net>
Date: Sat, Mar 22, 2014 at 6:31 PM
Subject: : MARRIAGE GYAN
To: ajit arora <ajit...@yahoo.com>
Cc: raj bhasin <rajpra...@yahoo.com>, Jagtej Arora <jagtej...@yahoo.co.in>, Navdeep Arora <naro...@yahoo.com>, Sunny Arora <aror...@yahoo.com>, Hari Nagdev <nna...@gmail.com>, Saheb Singh <ssd...@videotron.ca>, Randhir Singh Paschricha <ran...@yahoo.co.in>, Vinay Sood <sood...@hotmail.com>, Suketu Maniar <suketu...@yahoo.com>, IPS Anand <ipsan...@gmail.com>, Rana Arora <rana.a...@gmail.com>, Randip Arora <randip....@gmail.com>

Excellent humour. Watch suuroundings before reading. 

 

 

Marriage Gyan *********************************************** 1. How BEDROOM smells After MARRIAGE: 1st 3 yrs---perfumes, Flowers, Chocolate, Fruits..       After 3 yrs---Baby powder, Johnsons Cream and Lotions, Baby oils.. After 15 yrs---Zandu Balm, Vicks, Iodex, Relispray.. After 40 yrs---Agarbatti...   *********************************************** 2. Four stages of marriage: Mad for each other,    Made for each other, Mad at each other Mad because of each other ***********************************************       3.What's Marriage? Answer- MARRIAGE Is The 7th Sense of Humans That Destroys All The Six Senses       And Makes The Person NON Sense..! ***********************************************       4. Definition Of Happy Couple - HE Does What SHE Wants. SHE Does What SHE Wants. ***********************************************     5. Wife to Husband: Dear, this computer is not working as per my command. Husband replies: Exactly darling! It's a computer, not a Husband..!! *********************************************** 6. 'Laughing At Your Own Mistakes, Can Lengthen Your Life."- Shakespear   "Laughing At ur Wife's Mistakes, Can Shorten Ur Life."- Shakespear's Wife *********************************************** 7.Wife to Husband Agar meri shaadi kisi " Raakshas" se bhi ho jaati taw mai itni Pareshaan nahi hoti jitni tumare saath hun. Awesome reply: Husband : Are pagli, Blood Relation may shaadiyan kahaan hoti hain.. !!! ***********************************************

 

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__,_._,_

When Gandhi was studying law at the University College of London, there was

a professor, whose last name was Peters, who felt animosity for Gandhi, and

because Gandhi never lowered his head towards him, their "arguments" were

very common.

 

One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room of the University

and Gandhi came along with his tray and sat next to the professor. The

professor, in his arrogance, said, "Mr Gandhi: you do not understand... a

pig and a bird do not sit together to eat ", to which Gandhi replies, "You

do not worry professor, I'll fly away ", and he went and sat at another

table.

 

Mr. Peters, green of rage, decides to take revenge on the next test, but

Gandhi responds brilliantly to all questions. Then, Mr. Peters asked him the

following question, "Mr Gandhi, if you are walking down the street and find

a package, and within it there is a bag of wisdom and another bag with a lot

of money; which one will you take?"

 

Without hesitating, Gandhi responded, "the one with the money, of course".

 

Mr. Peters, smiling, said, "I, in your place, would have taken the wisdom,

 

don't you think?"

 

"Each one takes what one doesn't have", responded Gandhi indifferently.

 

Mr. Peters, already hysteric, writes on the exam sheet the word "idiot" and

gives it to Gandhi. Gandhi takes the exam sheet and sits down. A few minutes

later, Gandhi goes to the professor and says, "Mr. Peters, you signed the

sheet, but you did not give me the grade.

__

Contributed by G

Contributed by Gordhan Bhai

An elderly couple had just learned how to send text messages on their cell phones. The wife was a romantic type and the husband was more of a no-nonsense guy. One afternoon the wife went out to meet a friend for coffee. She decided to send her husband a romantic text message and she wrote: "If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears.     I love you."
The husband texted back to her: "I'm on the toilet. Please advise."