Jungle News and Upcoming Jungle Events
Jungle Hash
20 June: Chimps Bar Hop: First beer will be at the Boomerang Bar at 6 pm. No sign up - Pay as you go. Look at Hash notice board for the names of the night's bars. Drink at your own pace. There is no food stop on Bar Hops.
1 July: Run #399: The World Champions Run, Hares: Beverley Hills Pink Cock, Seal Sucker
A typical week out of Jellobutt's journal:
I was in the Tesco the other day and bumped into Really Sadistic Bastard walking the aisles with his lovely misses. RSD put 20 tall bottles of Chang in the basket and grinned like the Cheshire Cat. His wife growled, "You put those bottles back on the shelf RSD they're way too expensive." RSD's chin went down, "Yes dear." Further down the aisle his wife loaded up with face cream and whitening powder. "Now hold on there lassy,that cream is too expensive." "But tilac", she says, "this will make me more beautiful for you." RSD replies, "So will my 20 tallies of Chang and they're half the price,"
Sperm Polluter, Casper and myself went to Koh Si Chang for a long weekend. The only room available had only one very large bed. So, with a little trepidation we agreed to rent it. At 1:00am, I felt a bit cold and turned to Casper and whispered, "Casper, I'm a bit cold, can you go back out to the reception and ask them for a blanket for me"? "I have a better idea." says Casper, "Sperm Polluter is out taking a long walk on the beach, just this one time, lets pretend we're married." "Wow, really, that's a great idea." says I. "OK, says Casper, "Get your own fucking blanket."
I was in the Thai Military Bank yesterday and right in front of me was GI Joe and Squeeze My Tube standing in line. Just then a bank robber with a gun told the bank teller to load up a sack full of cash. Quickly a customer pulled the hood off the robber's head to reveal his face. Without hesitation, the robber instantly killed the customer. He then saw one of the cashiers stare at him directly. The robber, without hesitation, killed the cashier in cold blood. Now everyone is scared and looking down on the floor. The robber yells out "Did anyone else see my face?" There's a few moments of silence, then GI Joe, looking down, tentatively raises his hand and says, "I think my wife may have caught a glimpse..."
On On
The Ghost Rider
Jungle Hash
20 June: Chimps Bar Hop: First beer will be at the Boomerang Bar at 6 pm. No sign up - Pay as you go. Look at Hash notice board for the names of the night's bars. Drink at your own pace. There is no food stop on Bar Hops.
1 July: Run #399: The World Champions Run, Hares: Beverley Hills Pink Cock, Seal Sucker
13 July: Lunar Run #72: Hares: Jellobutt & tentatively Dodic if available. Assemble 18:30 pm, on out 19:00 pm. Website will be updated with details once they are finialized.
14 July: Jungle Boat Cruise: Boat leaves Bali Hai Pier 09:00 am sharp, return to Pattaya by 16:00 pm. Cost tentatively set at 250B/person. Enjoy a day of fishing and swimming around Koh Larn with your fellow Jungle hashers. Bring your own food and drink. Boat will have an Esky with ice to keep drinks cold.
15 July: Run #400: Jungle 400th Run Celebration, Hares: Colonel Cornhole, Snap, Crackle, Pop
Jungle Hash
20 June: Chimps Bar Hop: First beer will be at the Boomerang Bar at 6 pm. No sign up - Pay as you go. Look at Hash notice board for the names of the night's bars. Drink at your own pace. There is no food stop on Bar Hops.
13 July: Lunar Run #72: Hares: Jellobutt & tentatively Dodic if available. Assemble 18:30 pm, on out 19:00 pm at Cozy Beach. Optional transport from Boomerang Bar, depart 18:00 pm and return to Pattaya at 21:00 pm. Transport cost 100B/person to be paid in advance.
14 July: Jungle Boat Cruise: Boat leaves Bali Hai Pier 09:00 am sharp, return to Pattaya by 16:00 pm. Cost 250B/person to be paid in advance. Enjoy a day of fishing and swimming around Koh Larn with your fellow Jungle hashers. Bring your own food and drink. Boat will have an Esky with ice to keep drinks cold.
Jungle Hash
12 July: Chimps Bar Hop: First beer will be at the Boomerang Bar at 6 pm. No sign up - Pay as you go. Look at Hash notice board for the names of the night's bars. Drink at your own pace. There is no food stop on Bar Hops.
13 July: Lunar Run #72: Hares: Jellobutt & tentatively Dodic if available. Assemble 18:30 pm, on out 19:00 pm at Cozy Beach. Optional transport from Boomerang Bar, depart 18:00 pm and return to Pattaya at 21:30 pm. Transport cost 100B/person to be paid in advance.
14 July: Jungle Boat Cruise: Boat leaves Bali Hai Pier 09:00 am sharp, return to Pattaya by 16:00 pm. Cost 250B/person to be paid in advance. Enjoy a day of fishing and swimming around Koh Larn with your fellow Jungle hashers. Bring your own food and drink. Boat will have an Esky with ice to keep drinks cold.
15 July: Run #400: Jungle 400th Run Celebration, Hares: Colonel Cornhole, Snap, Crackle, Pop
18 July: Chimps Bar Hop: First beer will be at the Boomerang Bar at 6 pm. No sign up - Pay as you go. Look at Hash notice board for the names of the night's bars. Drink at your own pace. There is no food stop on Bar Hops.
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The weather God’s are kind for G M Jellobutt birthday run and the sun shines down on all of us as we gather to hear what the hares have to say about the trail.
After about 15 minutes of Jellobutt dribbling on and on and on I thought hang on a minute are we at the A -site for a run or are we at a secret hash mismanagement meeting in the hot sun with out a beer.
Finally the G.M and his personal secretary Pussy Snatcher stop spouting on about extra sign up fees and the state of the worlds cash shortage problems and eventually point the pack in the direction of the paper.
Even from the start the paper is very sparse, rolled up in tight balls and hidden in the long elephant grass.
With lovely open fields and good running trails all around us the hares send us up a never ending mountain with thorns, mosquitos, spiders ,snakes and its single file bush bashing stuff with the first 3kms taking about a bloody hour.
Finally we make it out of the wilderness and spend 10 minutes avoiding rowdy, dusty off road vehicles to solve a relatively easy check.
Next well hidden check is opposite a motor-cross track with hundreds of bikes tearing around in circles, training how to run over farang pedestrians in Pattaya.
The paper takes us across the road in to tapioca fields so the pack smashes our way through the inconsiderate farmers crop, how dare they grow that shit in our way.
We then descend on a open quarry with slippery banks studded with broken glass, its beyond belief that all hashers survived to drink another day.
We by-pass a few chained up elephants to arrive back at A- site app 1hr 50 minutes.
Jellobutt got his just desserts with his 67 th birthday cake baked on his bald knob.
On On
Seal Sucker
Paul Cade
https://www.facebook.com/johnny.ashcroft.142
Hi GaryA couple of things,1. Can you get a volunteer for the chimps bar hop as discussed2. Can you send me GI Joe’s email address as it appears Mr Giggle shit has dropped off Facebook and I wanted to see if squeeze has heard from Tik as she is back in Thailand now.
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