The Edge Of Seventeen كامل
Demi Kemmeries
Late in the winter of my seventeenth year, my mother decided I was depressed, presumably because I rarely left the house, spent quite a lot of time in bed, read the same book over and over, ate infrequently, and devoted quite a bit of my abundant free time to thinking about death.
the edge of seventeen كامل
Whenever you read a cancer booklet or website or whatever, they always list depression among the side effects of cancer. But, in fact, depression is not a side effect of cancer. Depression is a side effect of dying. (Cancer is also a side effect of dying. Almost everything is, really.) But my mom believed I required treatment, so she took me to see my Regular Doctor Jim, who agreed that I was veritably swimming in a paralyzing and totally clinical depression, and that therefore my meds should be adjusted and also I should attend a weekly Support Group.
The Support Group, of course, was depressing as hell. It met every Wednesday in the basement of a stone-walled Episcopal church shaped like a cross. We all sat in a circle right in the middle of the cross, where the two boards would have met, where the heart of Jesus would have been.
And his eyes were the problem. He had some fantastically improbable eye cancer. One eye had been cut out when he was a kid, and now he wore the kind of thick glasses that made his eyes (both the real one and the glass one) preternaturally huge, like his whole head was basically just this fake eye and this real eye staring at you. From what I could gather on the rare occasions when Isaac shared with the group, a recurrence had placed his remaining eye in mortal peril.
I pulled out my phone and clicked it so it would display the time: 4:59. The circle filled in with the unlucky twelve-to-eighteens, and then Patrick started us out with the serenity prayer: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. The guy was still staring at me. I felt rather blushy.
Finally, I decided that the proper strategy was to stare back. Boys do not have a monopoly on the Staring Business, after all. So I looked him over as Patrick acknowledged for the thousandth time his ball-lessness etc., and soon it was a staring contest. After a while the boy smiled, and then finally his blue eyes glanced away. When he looked back at me, I flicked my eyebrows up to say, I win.
It was a long list. The world contains a lot of dead people. And while Patrick droned on, reading the list from a sheet of paper because it was too long to memorize, I kept my eyes closed, trying to think prayerfully but mostly imagining the day when my name would find its way onto that list, all the way at the end when everyone had stopped listening.
And they stayed shrunk. Huzzah, Phalanxifor! In the past eighteen months, my mets have hardly grown, leaving me with lungs that suck at being lungs but could, conceivably, struggle along indefinitely with the assistance of drizzled oxygen and daily Phalanxifor.
Admittedly, my Cancer Miracle had only resulted in a bit of purchased time. (I did not yet know the size of the bit.) But when telling Augustus Waters, I painted the rosiest possible picture, embellishing the miraculousness of the miracle.
The photographers in this collection operated in Washington State, the Pacific Northwest, and Alaska, with a few from other areas outside the Pacific Northwest. The majority of the collection contains material from photographers active in Washington, Oregon, Alaska, British Columbia. Most of the photograph mounts bear photographers' imprints which often indicate street address in addition to city. For Washington State photographers if the photographer's location is given as in "Washington Territory" this would place their dates before 1889. Some materials are photographic postcards that bear postage, postmarks, and correspondences.
Photographs are grouped in folders according to the photographers last name or the photographic studio. Where two or more photographers share a last name, first and middle initials have been added to the folder name. Individual photographs are then numbered according to this folder-naming nomenclature and followed by sequential Arabic numerals.
Frank G. Abell (1844-1910) was born in Illinois and moved with hisparents to California in 1857. In 1862, at the age of 18, he joined the firm ofWilliam Shew in San Francisco, where he spend 4 years learning the art andbusiness of photography. On his own, Abell opened his first gallery, the AbellsStar Gallery, in Stockton in 1866. Moving back to San Francisco the followingyear, he then worked his way north, through Grass Valley, Red Bluff, and Yreka,arriving in Roseburg, Oregon in 1877.
Known primarily for his studio portraits, his gallery in Portlandwas both spacious and well furnished, including an "elegant piano for the freeuse of patrons". Abell also produced "Cards, Cabinets, Panels, Boudoirs,Stereoscopic and Out Door Views, and Living Statues", the latter being photosof living subjects arranged to present the appearance of a marble bust on apedestal. He moved to Tacoma in 1908 in failing health, and died in 1910.
William George Alexander (1880-1960) was born in Kansas. Heoperated a photography studio in Rainier, Oregon in 1910, and moved his studioto Douglas, Washington by 1915. He was active in Amira and Creston, Washingtoncirca 1913-1916. After World War I, Alexander became a wheat farmer in EasternWashington until his death.
Frank Perkins and Walter Allen operated the Georgetown PhotographStudio active at 6105 13th Ave South, Georgetown Station, Seattle, Washingtonfrom 1911-1915. In 1916 the studio was moved to 717 3rd Avenue. From1917-1920 only Frank Perkins is listed as a photographer at the 3rd Avenuelocation.
James Masatoku Amano was born in Choshi, Japan on May 9th, 1887.He came to Seattle, Washington aboard the SS AkiMaru on April 23, 1915. He was a photographer at the Jackson PhotoStudio, 624 Jackson, Seattle, Washington, circa 1919-1925. He had two childrenwith his wife, Zen. All were interned at Camp Minidoka during WWII - Amano viathe Department of Justice Internment and Detention in Santa Fe on July 9, 1943;and his wife, son and daughter via the Puyallup Assembly Center on August 10,1943.
The American View Co. stamp on the verso reads: Flashlights andinteriors a specialty. Prop's [ill.] Park. Other photographers using the nameAmerican View Co. are known to have operated in Wisconsin, Oregon, Californiaand Dakota. The relationships, if any, are not known.
William O. Amsden was part of the Seattle Photo Co. in 1890 alongwith Chester B. Walsworth. The office was located at 15 Shorey Blk. Amsden wasalso part of the Mountaineers and in 1890 was part of the Mount Rainierclimbing party that included Fay Fuller, who upon the completion of this ascentwas the first woman to stand on the summit.
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