A Place To Talk For Babies
Rapheal Charlton
You may want to talk with a lawyer to find out the best legal way for you to move forward. In most cities and counties in California, there are domestic violence agencies that can provide you legal help with your custody issues. You can contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline and ask them for domestic violence organizations in your area. Or click to find a legal aid agency in your area.
There are laws that deal with custody and visitation rights of parents in cases of domestic violence. First, the judge must decide if there is domestic violence, and if there is, the judge must follow special rules to decide custody of the children.
Usually, when a judge decides that your case is a domestic violence case, the judge CANNOT give custody (joint or sole custody) to the parent who committed domestic violence. But that parent can get parenting time with the children (visitation rights).
Talk to a lawyer about how the law will affect your rights to custody and visitation of your children, whether you are the victim of the domestic violence or the one who committed the abuse. Understanding what the law says and how it applies to your situation can be confusing and there are important rights at stake. Click for help finding a lawyer.
In mediation, a "mediator" (or "child custody recommending counselor") tries to help you and the other parent with making a parenting plan for your children. A parenting plan says who the children live with and who makes important decisions for the children.
Mediators work for the courts. They help parents make parenting plans that are good for the children. Mediators know how to work with separated couples, and they are trained to understand domestic violence. If you are worried about your safety or your children's safety, tell the mediator. You can ask to speak with the mediator alone. If there is a restraining order in your case or 1 parent is accusing the other of domestic violence, you have a right to meet separately with the mediator. You can also bring a support person with you to mediation and mediation orientation.
Mediators can also help with a "safety plan" for you and your children. They can suggest safe ways to get the children to and from visits with the other parent. Mediators can also tell you about getting help with housing, counseling, or financial problems.
- Usually, mediators interview both parties together. BUT in cases where there is domestic violence or a restraining order between the parents, you have the right to meet with the mediator separately from the other parent if you ask. The mediators are trained in the dynamics of domestic violence to protect your safety and any household member.
- If you have a restraining order, you can bring a support person to your mediation. If you do not have a restraining order but you are afraid of the other parent or intimidated by him or her, you can ask your mediator if a support person can come with you.
- Some mediators will interview children if it will help the parents to develop a parenting plan that is best for the children. Mediators are trained professionals and know how to interview children without making them choose between their parents or putting them in the middle.
- In mediation, what you say to the mediator when the other parent is not present is NOT confidential as far as the other parent goes. The mediator can tell the other parent what you say.
- In terms of confidentiality beyond you and the other parent, it depends on the rules of the court in your county. In some counties what you say is confidential, and it will stay between you and the mediator and the other parent. The other parent cannot use it in court proceedings.
- In other counties, mediators make "recommendations" to the judge when the parents do not reach an agreement in mediation. In the report, the mediator may include what you say in mediation. The report is given to you and is sent to the judge and to the other parent and his or her attorney. But it is confidential as far as anyone else goes.
- If a mediator suspects child abuse, he or she may need to report this to child protective services.
If a mediator suspects child abuse, he or she may need to report it. (It is a crime for a parent to file a false report of child abuse against the other parent.) Ask your mediator for a list of places that can help you and your children.
"Supervised visitation" means the children can visit the other parent if another adult is present. Supervised visitation is often a good idea in cases where there is a history or allegations of domestic violence, child abuse and neglect, or substance abuse. It is also used when there is a threat that 1 parent may kidnap the child. If you are worried about this, tell your mediator and the judge.
If the judge orders supervised visitations, the court order will specify the time and duration of the visits. Sometimes, the court order will also say who the provider (of the supervised visitation) is to be and where the visits are to take place.
Coming into the world is a big and scary adventure for babies. At first, they don't know you are there to feed and care for them - they only know when they feel comfortable and safe, or otherwise. However, even from birth, they start to communicate and give you little signals when they are tired or hungry, or awake and alert. They are learning all the time, and the job of parents is to help them know that the world is a welcoming place where their needs will be met.
Even shy and sleepy babies take an interest in your voice and face. A big section of the brain is devoted to understanding and remembering faces, and a large part of our social behaviour is based on how we 'read' other people's faces. Looking into someone's eyes is a necessity for 'falling in love', so show your baby your face and talk to them soothingly right from the start. Don't feel rejected if they turn away; tiny babies often get tired when they interact.
Newborns:
Newborns can hear, and have been hearing noises from well before they were born. Newborns have immature eye muscles and, while they can see (particularly at close range), they can't organise the visual images into meaningful shapes.
Developmental characteristics include:
Infants in the first eight weeks have no control over their movements and all their physical activity is involuntary or reflex. They move their bodies while they are awake, but they do not yet know how to make each part of their body move, or even that all the bits belong to them.
Developmental characteristics include:
For the newborn, crying is their only means of communication. It is important to respond to your baby as soon as possible, so they begin to understand that you will be there for them. Characteristics of speech include:
All children are different and develop at different rates, so if your baby doesn't do all the things listed in this article, it may be because they are working on some different area of learning and development. However, if your baby is very different from other children, or if you are worried about their development or it seems to go backwards, seek the advice of a health professional.
Signs that could suggest a developmental problem include:
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The first 3 years of life, when the brain is developing and maturing, is the most intensive period for acquiring speech and language skills. These skills develop best in a world that is rich with sounds, sights, and consistent exposure to the speech and language of others.
There appear to be critical periods for speech and language development in infants and young children when the brain is best able to absorb language. If these critical periods are allowed to pass without exposure to language, it will be more difficult to learn.
The first signs of communication occur when an infant learns that a cry will bring food, comfort, and companionship. Newborns also begin to recognize important sounds in their environment, such as the voice of their mother or primary caretaker. As they grow, babies begin to sort out the speech sounds that compose the words of their language. By 6 months of age, most babies recognize the basic sounds of their native language.
Children vary in their development of speech and language skills. However, they follow a natural progression or timetable for mastering the skills of language. A checklist of milestones for the normal development of speech and language skills in children from birth to 5 years of age is included below. These milestones help doctors and other health professionals determine if a child is on track or if he or she may need extra help. Sometimes a delay may be caused by hearing loss, while other times it may be due to a speech or language disorder.
Children who have trouble understanding what others say (receptive language) or difficulty sharing their thoughts (expressive language) may have a language disorder. Developmental language disorder (DLD) is a language disorder that delays the mastery of language skills. Some children with DLD may not begin to talk until their third or fourth year.
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