Kelly Hayes
unread,Apr 18, 2012, 3:48:53 PM4/18/12Sign in to reply to author
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I also need to take a little time for my much neglected personal affairs. Some of you know how screwed up I have let things get, just bc I see this as something that must be done, and I know I will long remember having stood with MHM, and you guys, out there. So far, I will feel really good about what we've done about this, and that's what's going to matter most to me, on a self focused manner, as the years go by.
I think everyone who's been out there, or worked this thing from a distance, will likewise feel that this was a huge moment, in terms of truly showing solidarity, and showing the courage of our convictions. A lot of you have been heroic in my eyes, over the course of these months, and the past week has only added to those feelings. Mike (and a couple of others) dragging himself out of a tent, into a violent storm, to help secure tents, under dangerous circumstances (knowing we couldn't ask for more help, bc the bodies of sleeping occupiers were actually holding some tents to the ground, after the stakes started to break and fly)... one person who showed up and joined a line of arrestables the first day of the tent city occupation, without having any idea what was unfolding, or how much danger we were in (this person didn't ask any questions, bc he knew the issue, that there was no time for a briefing, and that others were on the line - that was good enough for him)... my friends who lifted the spirits of everyone present, just by showing up... people who sent supplies and brought things we desperately needed (Natalie, and the metal stakes she brought, lifted me out of and exhausted sense of despair after I had nearly given up on holding down the freaking tents, after hammering broken, wind snapped, jagged stakes into the ground for hours)... the people who told me how awesome we were (which I didn't feel, but loved you for anyway) and told me to go sleep the night I finally went home (99, Camille, Matt, Crystal, and others on the ground, who jumped in, and started securing the tents, after a day that had seemed to stretch on forever)... Sam, who dragged himself out twice, once in the early morning, and once crazy late at night, in part because I had to leave or couldn't get back (you have no idea what that meant to me, man)... Babur, Thomas, Sugar, and everyone else who camped through the horrible weather, and helped hold it down... press, and the folks who tweeted and posted like mad... Lucas, who left me his charger, so I could keep bringing my phone to life, using a car battery... the arrestees, who were brave as hell... Tom, who stood with me on the front line during the last eviction, and ultimately stood between me and the police, knowing I was on red status, while he wasn't (what a bad ass thing to do - for the record, I would NEVER expect anyone to take it to that level)... Matt, and everyone else who worked the phones, and fought to get the word out when Rachel and Tom were locked up... if I am leaving anyone out (and I know I am), pls trust that I am brain fried, but I do know who you are, and I love the hell out of you. I am not saying all of this to play up my end of the work. I am saying it so that you all know that nothing that was done could have worked without every inch of help we got, and that I would have lost my shit without you guys. Some shit that was said and done, or not done, was discouraging, but some of you made all the difference, and that brought back some faith for me at a time when I was deteriorating, and questioning everything. Efforts were picking up just before the eviction, and I am confident that we got raided bc the cops saw something stronger taking shape, and freaked the fuck out when they figured out that we were going to make this work. On a personal level, and for the sake of the cause, I will always be grateful.
I know my exhaustion and frustration with some comments and attitudes, and the workload out there, have drawn a lot of negativity of me lately, so while I know this post is way to long, I thought it was worth it to jam something wholly positive into the listserv. Folks, we have been doing something really special out there. The way it went gave me doubts about us at times, but it has also shown me what the hell we can do when we fight like hell together. The hardest core people I know in this movement have been giving whatever they've got to give to this, and I am so damn proud to call you my friends and allies. I have been told repeatedly, by organizers on the ground, that the encampment never would have lasted, at all, without our efforts. We held off an eviction order (amazing), and we proved that we are hard enough to do something like this. We have consistently helped to bring media attention to a very important cause, and we will keep doing it. Don't lose faith, and don't be tempted to leap frog to the next big issue. Life after NATO will be about moments like this, and we should never lose sight of that.
- Kel
I also love Rachel's thoughts on this. Mad props to her for all of her work.