How To Make Women Happy...
BoBa
The Point System (advice according to women)
In the world of romance, one single rule applies: "MAKE THE WOMAN
HAPPY" Do something she likes and
you get points.
Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted.
You don't get any points for doing something she expects.
Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
Simple Duties:
You make the bed (+1)
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows (0)
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)
You made dinner (0)
it was not cooked on high 3-4 minutes in the microwave (+2)
water was not added and stirred for 1 minute (+3)
You cleaned up afterwards (+5)
You do the dishes (+1)
without her asking you to (+2)
but it was your turn anyways (0)
You leave the toilet seat up (-5)
You replace the toilet paper roll when it is empty (0)
When the toilet paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex (-1)
When the Kleenex runs out you use the next bathroom (-2)
You go out to buy her extra-light liners with wings (+5)
In the snow (+8)
But return with beer (-5)
You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it is nothing (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)
You pummel it with a six iron (+10)
It's her pet (-10)
Social Engagements At a Party:
You stay by her side the entire party (0)
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college
drinking buddy (-2)
Named Tiffany (-4)
Tiffany is a dancer (-6)
Tiffany has implants (-8)
Her Birthday:
You take her out to dinner (0)
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+1)
Okay, it is a sports bar (-2)
And it's all-you-can-eat night (-3)
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is
painted in all of the colors of your favorite sports team (-10)
A Night Out With the Boys:
Go with a pal (-5)
The pal is happily married (-4)
Or frighteningly single (-7)
And he drives a Mustang (-10)
With a personalized license plate that reads GR8 N BED (-15)
A Night Out:
You open the car door for her (0)
You open the car door and wait for her to get in so you can close
the door for her (+3)
You start the car before she even gets in (-4)
You tell her to wait in the car so you can open the door for her to
let her out (+6)
You take her to a movie (0)
You take her to a movie she likes (+2)
You take her to a movie you hate (+4)
You take her to a movie you like (-2)
It's called Cop 9 (-3)
Which features cyborgs that eat humans (-9)
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)
You pay for her (0)
She offers to pay and you guys go dutch (-1)
She offers to pay but you won't let her (+5)
You forgot your wallet and she has to pay (-15)
Your Physique:
You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to loose jeans and baggy
Hawaiian shirts (-30)
You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-800)
Communication:
When she wants to talk about a problem:
You listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression (0)
You listen, for over 30 minutes (+5)
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+100)
She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-20)
Surprises:
You sent her flowers (0)
it's not her birthday (+2)
with a card that says "I LOVE YOU Tiffany" (+5)
but her name is Samantha (-100)
The Big Question:
She asks, "Do I look fat?":
You hesitate in responding (-10)
You reply, "Where?" (-35)
Any other response (-20)
Moderator
BoBa <vin...@viii.ntu-kpi.kiev.ua>
писал(а) в сообщении <3FD4B046...@viii.ntu-kpi.kiev.ua> такое!
B> How To Make Women Happy...
4.1.9. Запрещаются поиск и размещение развлекательного юмористического материала
явно не студенческой тематики. Эти вопросы соответствуют тематике конференции
NTU-KPI.REC.CHAT. Наказание- [+].
Итого:
Числа Fri, 21 Nov 2003 08:56:56 +0000 (UTC)
писал(а) в сообщении <3FBDD319...@viii.ntu-kpi.kiev.ua> такое!
4.2.8. Запрещается продолжение нити, закрытой (Ко)Модератором. Наказание- [+].
Числа Fri, 21 Nov 2003 21:39:01 +0000 (UTC)
писал(а) в сообщении <3FBE85B7...@viii.ntu-kpi.kiev.ua> такое!
4.1.5. Запрещаются обсуждение искусства, поиск и анонс предметов искусства. Эти
вопросы соответствуют тематике конференций NTU-KPI.REC.ART и NTU-KPI.REC.MUSIC.
Наказание- [+].
Числа Fri, 28 Nov 2003 00:55:55 +0000 (UTC)
писал(а) в сообщении <3FC69CE0...@viii.ntu-kpi.kiev.ua> такое!
4.3.4. Запрещаются чрезмерное использование транслитерации, замена алфавитных
символов неалфавитными и представление текста в трудно читаемой форме.
Наказание- [*].
Числа Mon, 8 Dec 2003 17:10:41 +0000 (UTC)
писал(а) в сообщении <3FD4B046...@viii.ntu-kpi.kiev.ua> такое!
4.1.9. Запрещаются поиск и размещение развлекательного юмористического материала
явно не студенческой тематики. Эти вопросы соответствуют тематике конференции
NTU-KPI.REC.CHAT. Наказание- [+].
[!] - RO на 30 суток
--
Digitally yours, [team Стриженый Дятел]
Borodin Anatoly mailto:fra...@viii.ntu-kpi.kiev.ua
http://viii.ntu-kpi.kiev.ua/~fractal
