QUOTE OF THE DAY
“The way in which Archie dies is everything that you would expect of Archie” — Archie Comics publisher Jon Goldwater. Spoiler: Archie dies while saving his gay friend Kevin. Totally what you expected.
GUESS.
THE STORY
Yesterday, Egypt proposed a cease-fire between Israelis and Palestinians. This morning, Israel accepted it, but it’s unclear whether Hamas will now follow suit.
WHAT’S THE LATEST?
More conflict. Lots of opinions. Yesterday, Hamas sent a drone to Israel, who shot it down. New thing–It’s the first time Hamas has used a drone in this conflict. Meanwhile, with rising death tolls in Gaza, Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas called on the UN to protect Palestinians. Israel accepted Egypt’s cease-fire proposal, which calls for bringing Israelis and Hamas militants together to talk out a more long-term solution for peace. Before Israel announced its acceptance, Hamas said it isn’t going for it and quickly rejected the plan. And shortly after Israel’s announcement, rockets were still being fired into Israel from Gaza.
WHAT HAD PALESTINIANS SAID?
This isn’t just a tit-for-tat battle because we’re up against one of the more sophisticated militaries in the world. And this isn’t just about Hamas. Over 170 Palestinian civilians, many who live in poverty and have nowhere to go because of Israeli blockades and sanctions, have been killed in just the last week. Zero deaths on the Israeli side.
WHAT HAD ISRAELIS SAID?
This isn’t just a tit-for-tat battle because it’s us (a democratic state) versus Hamas (a terror group). Hamas, which doesn’t believe we should exist, keeps firing rockets into our country and we’re doing what anyone would to protect our people. Plus, Hamas uses their people as human shields. We try to warn civilians in Gaza ahead of our attacks, and if we didn’t, the death toll would be much higher.
theSKIMM
Hamas and Israel have clashed many times before. Guess who brokered the last cease-fire in 2012? Yup, Egypt. Here’s hoping for a round two that lasts.
REPEAT AFTER ME…
WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU GET YOUR CREDIT CARD BILL…
Wish there were a few less zeroes here. Yesterday, the US and Citigroup said they are finally ready to put all the unpleasantness of the ’08 housing collapse behind them. The cost? Citigroup will cough up $7 billion — aka one big ‘I’m sorry’ for misleading investors about subpar mortgages. The money is supposed to go to Uncle Sam and things like building affordable housing and helping struggling families refinance their mortgages. But the deal doesn’t mean the bank or its employees are off the hook for possible criminal charges. So the bankers who wrote emails about how the bank should “start praying” because of bad loans could still be in hot water. You can also find those bankers chilling in an Intro to Email class.
WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU GET BACK TO YOUR DESK AND REALIZE EVERYONE’S BEEN TALKING ABOUT YOU…
Bet I’ve got nothing on Bergdahl. Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl was an American prisoner of war in Afghanistan. He was held by the Taliban for five years, but in May, the US cut a deal with the Taliban to swap Bergdahl for five big-time Taliban prisoners. The circumstances of how Bergdahl disappeared are unclear, but some soldiers from his unit say he deserted the base. He’s been recovering since his release, and is now returning to active duty. As seen in Season 1, episode four of “Homeland.” He’ll be at a desk job on a base in Texas while the Army continues its investigation into his disappearance.
WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOUR ROOMMATE WANTS TO ADD MORE PINK…
Big changes afoot. Yesterday, the Church of England voted to let women become bishops for the first time ever. Amen. The proposal was approved by the required two-thirds of the General Synod (sin-uhd), the church’s version of Congress. A similar idea was brought up in 2012, but things were more traditional in those times, and it didn’t get enough votes to pass. The Church of England isn’t just for the Brits — it’s part of a community with a presence in over 160 countries, and some branches like the US and New Zealand already allow female bishops. But this ends a long running fight on the home turf over equality in the higher levels of the church.
WHAT TO SAY WHEN THE CONSTRUCTION NEXT DOOR WON’T STOP…
Some things feel like they never end. Yesterday, a Ukrainian military plane was shot down while flying near the Russian border. Everyone survived. The pro-Russian separatists — who’ve been hating on Ukraine and trying to join Russia for months — quickly claimed credit, but it took Ukraine about 10 seconds to point the finger at Russia. Ukrainian officials say the plane was flying too high for the separatists’ weapons to reach, so did anyone in Russia happen to launch a missile recently? The Motherland had no comment. This comes just after a Ukrainian shell from across the border reportedly killed a Russian citizen, and Russia warned of “irreversible consequences.” Happy Tuesday.
WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE KETCHUP ON YOUR SPAGHETTI…
In other strange match-ups…iconic auction house Sotheby’s is pairing up with shopping giant eBay. Yesterday, Sotheby’s, which sells things like fine wine and Picassos, announced it will soon live stream its auctions on the same website where you can bid on a grilled cheese with Jesus’s face on it. Sotheby’s has been taking some hits in the media lately thanks to a public fight with a shareholder who knocked the auction house for its old-school business practices. It doesn’t help that in recent years, some of its sales have faded like a Persian rug in the sun. Plus, arch-rival Christie’s just announced a major investment in online auctions. eBay has 145 million customers, you can see where Sotheby’s is going with this.
THING TO KNOW
Alligator vs. Crocodile: Alligators have wider U-shaped noses and prefer fresh water. Crocodiles have more pointed, V-shaped noses, and prefer saltwater and ugly shoes. You run from both.
SKIMM LIFE
On Friday we turn 2. It's our birthday party, and we'll invite our world leader spirit animals if we want to. Take our quiz to find out which one is yours.
SKIMM BIRTHDAY GIFT
Arguably the best part of birthdays? Cake! Rather than jumping out of one, we want to send you one. Use your unique URL: http://www.theskimm.com/?r=3H7NN and share away today - top sharers have a special delivery in store...
SKIMM BIRTHDAYS
Brooke Richman (New York, NY); Aaron Sobel (Bethesda, MD); Jane Lynch (Los Angeles, CA); Jackie Carter (New York, NY); Yannick Peeters (Antwerp, Belgium); W. O'Connell (Greenwich, CT); Savannah Greene (Pasadena, CA); Diana Dai Phan (San Capistrano, CA); Alex Lasry (New York, NY); Diane Jennings; Lauren Baughman (Houston, TX); Melissa Shulman (Purchase, NY); Michelle Black (Athens, GA); Pam Cesak (La Jolla, CA); Nicole Hosseinipour (New York, NY); Helena Keck (Portland, OR); Lauren Raia (New York, NY); Martha Kiley; Michelle Broussard (New Iberia, LA)
