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BMW Vitser.

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Kjell

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Jan 10, 2001, 3:26:26 PM1/10/01
to
Hei, er det noen som kan vitser om bilmerker.
Som for eks.

BMV = Bergen MEGA Varer.
BMV = Bare Meka Volvo.
BMV = Bergen Med Været.
BMW = Berlin Meksico Wagen.
BMW = Bergen Med West-Norge.

Hilsen Kjell.
________________________________________________________

E-meil............: kjkv...@online.no
Home-page.....: http://home.online.no/~kjkvarme/
Foto................: http://home.online.no/~kjkvarme/fotorame.htm
Foto, Linkar og vitser.
________________________________________________________

Karl Inge Larsen

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Jan 11, 2001, 5:42:03 AM1/11/01
to
DBS - Dasset Bak Stortinget.
DBS - Døden Bak Styret.

Dine bilmerkevitser stinker.

Sol

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Jan 11, 2001, 5:49:35 AM1/11/01
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Hva med: Bader Meinhof Wagen


"Kjell" <kjkv...@online.no> wrote in message
news:EA376.2301$k25....@news1.oke.nextra.no...

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joakim aanstad

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Jan 11, 2001, 6:37:57 AM1/11/01
to
On Wed, 10 Jan 2001 21:26:26 +0100, "Kjell" <kjkv...@online.no>
wrote:

>Hei, er det noen som kan vitser om bilmerker.
>Som for eks.
>
>BMV = Bergen MEGA Varer.
>BMV = Bare Meka Volvo.
>BMV = Bergen Med Været.
>BMW = Berlin Meksico Wagen.
>BMW = Bergen Med West-Norge.

>Ford = Fiks Og Reparer Daglig

Espen Stranger Seland

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Jan 11, 2001, 6:28:59 AM1/11/01
to
On Thu, 11 Jan 2001 11:42:03 +0100, Karl Inge Larsen
<karl...@studpost.aft.hist.no> wrote:

>DBS - Dasset Bak Stortinget.
>DBS - Døden Bak Styret.

Dritt Bak Setet.
Dostojevskis Beste Storselgere.

-espen
--
It's not whether you win or lose, http://kongstud.hibu.no/~espenst7/
but how you place the blame. http://home.no.net/vinyl33/

joakim aanstad

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Jan 11, 2001, 6:41:25 AM1/11/01
to
On Wed, 10 Jan 2001 21:26:26 +0100, "Kjell" <kjkv...@online.no>
wrote:

>Hei, er det noen som kan vitser om bilmerker.


>Som for eks.
>
>BMV = Bergen MEGA Varer.
>BMV = Bare Meka Volvo.
>BMV = Bergen Med Været.
>BMW = Berlin Meksico Wagen.
>BMW = Bergen Med West-Norge.

>BMW = Brøl Med Warener

Amund Johansen

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Jan 11, 2001, 9:06:37 AM1/11/01
to
hvis man leser denne baklengs, får man en satanistisk melding da ?
Siden det var to poster fra samme person som tilsynelatende er like:
skummelt.

Amund
--
I'll see you on the dark side of the moon

http://home.online.no/~amunjoha/index.html

Kjartan Kvassnes

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Jan 12, 2001, 4:40:46 AM1/12/01
to
"Kjell" <kjkv...@online.no> wrote in message
news:EA376.2301$k25....@news1.oke.nextra.no...
> Hei, er det noen som kan vitser om bilmerker.

Hva med
FIAT?
Fiasko I All Teknikk
Fix It Again Tony

-k


Frode Hansen

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Jan 12, 2001, 8:03:56 AM1/12/01
to
From a moldy scroll found in a dusty closet: By "Kjartan Kvassnes"
<kvas...@netcom.no>, on Fri, 12 Jan 2001 10:40:46 +0100:

For min del holder det med: Faen Ikke Annet enn Trøbbel.

--
Frode Hansen
ICQ#: 4664736

Don't dare to be different, dare to be yourself. If that doesn't
make you different then something is wrong.

Iceman

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Jan 12, 2001, 10:13:16 AM1/12/01
to

"Kjell" <kjkv...@online.no> skrev i melding news:EA376.2301$k25....@news1.oke.nextra.no...

> Hei, er det noen som kan vitser om bilmerker.

Hva med disse ?????? :)

> >
> >BMW :
> >= Bring More Women (Broke My Wallet )
> >
> >CHEVROLET :
> >= Can Hear Every Value Rap On Long Extended Trips.
> >
> >FIAT :
> >= Failure in Italian Automotive Technology.
> >
> >FORD :
> >= Fast Only Rolling Downhill.
> >
> >GM :
> >= Garbage Motors.
> >
> >HONDA :
> >= Hallmark Of Non-Destructible Automobiles (Yes!)
> >
> >HYUNDAI :
> >= Hope You Understanding Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive.
> >
> >SAAB :
> >= Shape Appears Ass-Backwards.
> >
> >SUBARU :
> >= Screwed Up Beyond All Repair Usually.
> >
> >TOYOTA :
> >= Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto.
> >
> >VOLVO
> >= Very Old Looking Vehicular Object.
> >
> >PORSCHE
> >= Proof Of Rich Spoiled Children Having Everything.

Var de morsomme - nei
Ba du om det - JA !!!!!!!

:)

Olve :)

Reidar M Nekstaad

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Jan 12, 2001, 2:36:15 PM1/12/01
to

"Kjell" <kjkv...@online.no> skrev i melding
news:EA376.2301$k25....@news1.oke.nextra.no...
> Hei, er det noen som kan vitser om bilmerker.

Hva med disse ?????? :)

Eller denne?

MAZDA- Meine Auto Zanieren Deutsche Arbeitsplaze


Reidar M Nekstaad

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Jan 12, 2001, 2:34:47 PM1/12/01
to

"Iceman" <olve....@pd.politiet.no> skrev i melding
news:6iF76.875$bA4....@news1.oke.nextra.no...

"Kjell" <kjkv...@online.no> skrev i melding
news:EA376.2301$k25....@news1.oke.nextra.no...
> Hei, er det noen som kan vitser om bilmerker.

Hva med disse ?????? :)

eller denne


Kjell

unread,
Jan 12, 2001, 6:46:17 PM1/12/01
to
Er det noen som kan vitser om diverse merker.
På forhond takk.

FORD - Fiks Og Reparer Daglig.
SABB - Sol Asfalterte Bil Baner.

DBS - D-ford Biler Stinker.
DBS - Den Beste Solo.


DBS - Dasset Bak Stortinget.

DBS - Det Beste Sortiment.


DBS - Døden Bak Styret.

DBS - Dritt Bak Setet.
DBS - Dostojevskis Beste Storselgere.

BMV - Bergen MEGA Varer.
BMV - Bare Meka Volvo.
BMV - Bergen Med Været.
BMW - Berlin Meksico Wagen.
BMW - Bergen Med West-Norge.
BMW - Brøl Med Warener.

ITT - Italiensk Tango Treiler.
SONY - Solo Og Ny Yankie-sveis.

--

Jens

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Jan 13, 2001, 3:08:32 PM1/13/01
to

Kjell <kjkv...@online.no> skrev i
meldingsnyheter:BYM76.1263$bA4....@news1.oke.nextra.no...

> Er det noen som kan vitser om diverse merker.
> På forhond takk.
>
> FORD - Fiks Og Reparer Daglig.
> SABB - Sol Asfalterte Bil Baner.
>
> DBS - D-ford Biler Stinker.
> DBS - Den Beste Solo.
> DBS - Dasset Bak Stortinget.
> DBS - Det Beste Sortiment.
> DBS - Døden Bak Styret.
> DBS - Dritt Bak Setet.
> DBS - Dostojevskis Beste Storselgere.
>
> BMV - Bergen MEGA Varer.
> BMV - Bare Meka Volvo.
> BMV - Bergen Med Været.
> BMW - Berlin Meksico Wagen.
> BMW - Bergen Med West-Norge.
> BMW - Brøl Med Warener.
BMW- Bayerche Makk Werchen
BMW - Bayerche Mester Werchen

Bobo

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Jan 13, 2001, 6:19:28 PM1/13/01
to
Er det ingen som har noen forkortelser på VW?
Jeg trenger noe jeg kan kalle hampcontaineren min: -)
(-70 variant, peace mon)

Bobo


Trond Arve Hjelle

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Jan 14, 2001, 8:37:05 AM1/14/01
to
"Jens" <jens...@c2i.net> skrev i melding
>
> Kjell <kjkv...@online.no> skrev i

> > Er det noen som kan vitser om diverse merker.
> > På forhond takk.
> >
> > FORD - Fiks Og Reparer Daglig.
> > SABB - Sol Asfalterte Bil Baner.

Kva er SABB?
Såvidt eg veit er det ikkje en bil.......

Obbilvits:
Vil du bli kjørtforbi, kjøp Mazda 929!

--
Trond-Arve Hjelle
87' SAAB 900c
saa...@online.no
http://saab900.hjelleweben.com
ICQ: 29906725


Ulf Christensen

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Jan 15, 2001, 6:07:07 AM1/15/01
to
Trond Arve Hjelle wrote:

Med stor fare for å bli seriøs, så mener jeg SABB er en Ford motor
variant brukt i båter.
uc

Jens

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Jan 15, 2001, 9:30:27 AM1/15/01
to

Ulf Christensen <ulf.chr...@kongsberg.com> skrev i
meldingsnyheter:3A62D9DB...@kongsberg.com...

Jepp, SABB er en båtmotor.


Øystein Berg

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Jan 15, 2001, 3:07:55 PM1/15/01
to
Ulf Christensen wrote:

klipp



> Med stor fare for å bli seriøs, så mener jeg SABB er en Ford motor
> variant brukt i båter.

Forskjellen ligger i antall Aer og Ber.
SAAB og SABB

Fordmotorene av V-typen fantes i 12M, 15M, 17M og 20M + i SAAB. Jeg tror
det var 15M motoren.
men om det er humor er jeg i tvil om.
Det nærmeste må ha vært min 17M 65 mod. som jeg eide rundt 1980-82. Den
hadde rattgir, sofa foran, registrert for 6 og ble døpt til Negerbussen.

--
Øystein Berg Drammen
ob...@drammensnett.no http://home.online.no/~oberg/

Kjell

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Jan 14, 2001, 3:47:48 PM1/14/01
to

Trond Arve Hjelle <saa...@online.no> wrote in message
news:cYi86.3188$wt2....@news1.oke.nextra.no...

> "Jens" <jens...@c2i.net> skrev i melding
> >
> > Kjell <kjkv...@online.no> skrev i
> > > Er det noen som kan vitser om diverse merker.
> > > På forhond takk.
> > >
> > > FORD - Fiks Og Reparer Daglig.
> > > SABB - Sol Asfalterte Bil Baner.
>
> Kva er SABB?
> Såvidt eg veit er det ikkje en bil.......
>
> Obbilvits:
> Vil du bli kjørtforbi, kjøp Mazda 929!
>

Kva er SABB?
Det er nok ikke en bil, ser mer ut som en vits.

VW - Venskaps Wagen
VW - Volvo Wasington

Odd Veibust

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Jan 17, 2001, 3:12:50 AM1/17/01
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Big Money Wasted
Bær Møkka (W)ekk
Bedre Merke i (W)ente
Bedre Med (W)AG (VAG = Volkswagen Audi Group)

"Kjell" <kjkv...@online.no> wrote in message
news:EA376.2301$k25....@news1.oke.nextra.no...

Jogeir Lindseth

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Jan 17, 2001, 5:32:52 AM1/17/01
to
* Odd Veibust <o...@mimer.no>:


--
_/_/_/ mvh Jogeir Lindseth. Linux reg.user 133963.
MoonPhase: Waning Crescent (41% of Full)
ACURA:
Another Crummy, Useless, Rotten Automobile
Asia's Curse Upon Rural America

AMC:
All Makes Combined
A Major Cost
A Mutated Car
A Morons Car
Another Major Catastrophe

AUDI:
Always Unsafe Designs Implemented
Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
Automobile Under Demonic Influence
Another Ugly Deutsche Invention
Always Undermining Deutsche Intelligence
Automobile Unsafe Designs, Inc.

BMW:
Big Money Works
Bought My Wife
Brutal Money Waster
Break My Window
Break My Windshield
Babbling Mechanical Wench
Beastly Monstrous Wonder
Beautiful Masterpieces on Wheels
Beautiful Mechanical Wonder
Barely Moving Wreck
Big Money Waste
Big Money. Why?
Big Money Works
Born Moderately Wealthy
Breaks Most Wrenches
Bring Many Wrenches
Brings Me Women
Brings More Women
Broken Money Waster
Broke My Wallet
Broken Monstrous Wonder
Bumbling Mechanical Wretch
Blasphemous Motorized Wreck

BUICK:
Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer
Big Ugly Imitation Chrome King

CHEVROLET:
Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time
Cracked Heads, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time
Constantly Having Every Vehicle Recalled Over Lousy Engineering
Techniques

DODGE:
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
Damn Old Dirty Gas Eater
Dead Old Dog Going East
Dead On Day Guarantee Expires
Dead On Delivery, Go Easy
Dead On Delivery, Guarantee Expired
Dead Or Dying Garbage Emitter
Dear Old Dads Garage Experiment

EDSEL: Every Day Something Else Leaks

FIAT:
Failure in Italian Automotive Technology
Fix It Again, Tony!
Feeble Italian Attempt at Transportation

Faen Ikke Annet enn Trøbbel.

FORD:
Frigin' Old Rebuilt Dodge
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road Dead
Fast Only Rolling Downhill
First On Race Day
First On Recall Day
Fabricated Of Refried Dung
Fails On Rainy Days
Fantastically Orgasmic Realistic Dream
Fatally Obese Redneck Driver
Fault Of R&D
Finally Obsolete Racing Device
Fireball On Rear Denting
First On Road to Dump
First On Rust and Deterioration
Fix Or Recycle Dilemma
Flipping Over Results in Death
Flipped Over Roadside Disaster
Follow Our Rusty Dogsled
Foot On Road Decelerates
Forced On Reluctant Drivers
Formed Of Rejected DNA
Forwarded Once; Return Denied
Forward Only; Reverse Defective
Forlorn, Old, Ratridden Dustbin
Fork Over Repair Dough
Fouled Out Re-done Dodge
Frequent Overhaul, Rapid Deterioration
Free Or Reduced Drastically
Frequent Opinion: Really Disappointed
Fumes and Odors Readily Detectable
Funny Old Rattling Dump
(backwards) Driver Returns On Foot

GEO: Good Engineering Overlooked

GM:
General Maintenance
Great Mistake
Garbage Motors
Generally Miserable
Grossly Misconceived
Gluteus Maximus

GMC:
Garage Man's Companion
Gotta Mechanic Coming?
Generally Mediocre Cars
Get More Chicks
Gets Mechanics Crazy
Gods Mechanical Curse
Got More Crap
Great Mountain Climber
Great Motor Car

GTO: Gas, Tires, Oil

HONDA:
Had One Never Did Again
Hang On, Not Done Accelerating
Hallmark Of Non-Descript Automobiles
Hallmark Of Non-Destructable Automobiles

HYUNDAI: Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive...

JEEP:
Just Eats Every Part
Junk Engineering Executed Poorly

LADA: Laget Av Diverse Avfall

MAZDA: Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along
MG: Money Guzzler
MGB: Might Go Backwards
MGF: Might Go Forward
MIATA: My Intention: Always To Accelerate

MOPAR
Many Odd Parts Arranged Randomly
Miscellaneous Oddball Parts Assembled Ridiculously
Most Often Passed At Races
Mostly Old Parts And Rust
Move Over People Are Racing
Move Over Plymouth Approaching Rapidly
My Old Pig Ain't Running
My Only Problems Are Repairs

MUSTANG: Motor Under Strain, Transmission Almost No Good
OLDSMOBILE: Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's
Irregular Leftover Equipment

PINTO:
Put In Nickel To Operate
Paid Inspector Nicely To Overlook

PONTIAC: Poor Old Numbskull Thinks Its A Cadillac
PORSCHE: Proof Of Rich Spoiled Children Having Everything

SAAB:
Send Another Automobile Back
Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown
Sad Attempt At Beauty
Sorry Auto, Always Broken
Shape Appears Ass-Backwards

SUBARU: Screwed Up Beyond All Repair Usually

TOYOTA:

Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

Torturous On Your Old Tired Ass
The One You Ought To Avoid

TRIUMPH:
This Really Is Unreliable Man, Please Help!
Tried Repairing It Until My Parts Hurt!

VOLVO: Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object
VW: Virtually Worthless

Egil Simones

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Jan 17, 2001, 7:50:39 AM1/17/01
to
Lotus= Lots Of Trouble, Usualy Serious

Egil


Kjell <kjkv...@online.no> skrev i
meldingsnyheter:EA376.2301$k25....@news1.oke.nextra.no...

Egil Simones

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Jan 19, 2001, 3:38:13 PM1/19/01
to
BMW = Black Mans Wagon

Forklarer at en del østkantfolk liker dem..........

Kjell <kjkv...@online.no> skrev i
meldingsnyheter:EA376.2301$k25....@news1.oke.nextra.no...

Per-Johnny Tøgersen

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Feb 3, 2001, 12:40:41 PM2/3/01
to
Eller hva med
Fabricio Italiano Automobile Torino?

Pjt

"Frode Hansen" <fh...@world-online.no> skrev i melding
news:76tt5t87iv0e14ir2...@4ax.com...

Per-Johnny Tøgersen

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Feb 3, 2001, 12:42:45 PM2/3/01
to
Caravelle/Transporter 2,4D:
Container
Dieselpurke

Pjt

"Bobo" <bjorn...@hotmail.com> skrev i melding
news:97942810...@news2.cybercity.dk...

Reidar M Nekstaad

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Feb 4, 2001, 3:08:28 PM2/4/01
to

"Per-Johnny Tøgersen" <per.to...@go.telia.no> skrev i melding
news:toXe6.1030$XUf.18...@news.telia.no...

> Eller hva med
> Fabricio Italiano Automobile Torino?
Den var god...hahahahahahahahahaha


Kjell

unread,
Feb 4, 2001, 5:09:32 PM2/4/01
to
Vitser om diverse merker

ACURA:
Auto (C)rutt Under Radiator Anulert.
Asia's Car, Usansynle Rosta Australiener


Asia's Curse Upon Rural America

AMC:
Altid Major (C)ost
Altid Molbo (C)atastrofe
Altid Mormors (C)ar
Auto Major (C)ar

AUDI:
Akselrator Under Diverse Indikator
Automobil Under Demo, Innkjøpt.

BMW:
Bare Meka (W)olvo.
Berlin Meksico Wagon.
Brøl Med Wasington
Black Mans Wagon
Bring Mamma (W)asketøy
Bær Møkka (W)ekk
Bedre Merke (W)entes


Bedre Med (W)AG (VAG = Volkswagen Audi Group)

Bring More Women (Broke My Wallet )

Bading Med Wenche


Beastly Monstrous Wonder
Beautiful Masterpieces on Wheels
Beautiful Mechanical Wonder
Barely Moving Wreck
Big Money Waste
Big Money. Why?
Big Money Works
Born Moderately Wealthy
Breaks Most Wrenches
Bring Many Wrenches
Brings Me Women
Brings More Women
Broken Money Waster
Broke My Wallet
Broken Monstrous Wonder
Bumbling Mechanical Wretch
Blasphemous Motorized Wreck

BUICK:
Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer
Big Ugly Imitation Chrome King

CHEVROLET:
Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips.


Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time
Cracked Heads, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time
Constantly Having Every Vehicle Recalled Over Lousy Engineering
Techniques

DODGE:
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
Damn Old Dirty Gas Eater
Dead Old Dog Going East
Dead On Day Guarantee Expires
Dead On Delivery, Go Easy
Dead On Delivery, Guarantee Expired
Dead Or Dying Garbage Emitter
Dear Old Dads Garage Experiment

DBS - De-ford Biler Stinker.


DBS - Den Beste Solo.
DBS - Dasset Bak Stortinget.
DBS - Det Beste Sortiment.
DBS - Døden Bak Styret.
DBS - Dritt Bak Setet.
DBS - Dostojevskis Beste Storselgere.

EDSEL: Every Day Something Else Leaks

FIAT:
Finner Ikke Annet enn Trøbbel.


Fiasko I All Teknikk
Fix It Again Tony

Failure in Italian Automotive Technology

Feeble Italian Attempt at Transportation

FORD:
Fiks Og Reparer Daglig.
Fast Only Rolling Downhill.

GEO: Good Engineering Overlooked

GTO: Gas, Tires, Oil

Hallmark Of Non-Destructible Automobiles (Yes!)

HYUNDAI :


Hope You Understanding Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive.

Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive...

JEEP:
Jeg Er Erte Peter


Just Eats Every Part
Junk Engineering Executed Poorly

LADA: Laget Av Diverse Avfall

MAZDA- Meine Auto Zanieren Deutsche Arbeitsplaze

SUBARU:
Seven Up Baker Amrikanske Romper Usynle.
Screwed Up Beyond All Repair Usually.

ITT - Italiensk Tango Treiler.
SONY - Solo Og Ny Yankie-sveis.

TOYOTA:


Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto
Torturous On Your Old Tired Ass
The One You Ought To Avoid

TRIUMPH:
This Really Is Unreliable Man, Please Help!
Tried Repairing It Until My Parts Hurt!

VOLVO:
Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

Vesle Oldemor Laga Vafel Object.

VW - Virtually Worthless


VW - Venskaps Wagen
VW - Volvo Wasington

VW (BOBLA) = (Bang Olufsen Bobler Lange Armatur-lusrør.)


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