Needing Advice

[Laurie B]

My grandma (80) went down to florida for the winter to stay with her
brother as she usually does (with permission from her oncologist
because her tumor has not grown nor shrank) in September and she needs
to be back in March for scans. In the beginning October my other
grandma (88) was diagnosed with metastasized breast cancer in her
liver, lungs, and breast bone, and unfortunately passed away a few
days before Thanksgiving.

I'm going down to Florida the end of February to visit my grandma and
great uncle. My aunt and mom are trying to convince my grandma to come
back home with me on March 2nd but she says its too soon even though
the doctor wants her back for scans. My aunt also told me that my
grandma has been having pain where the tumor. I think she is scared
seeing what happened to my other grandma so quickly and doesn't want
to have any tests done because she doesn't want to know the truth. My
aunt is trying to tell her that she needs to have the scans done as
soon as possible so they can treat her with more radiation or if the
tumor has shrunk maybe they can try surgery.

I'd be really grateful if anyone had encouraging words for me to tell
her.

Thank you,
Laura

[LaVon Esswein]

Laura,  First, sorry for your loss. Second,dealing with the elderly & cancer is bad enough, but add on the recent death & I can see why she so scared.  Be patient with her.  All of you have to accept that it is her cancer & ultimately she has to make the choice.  All you can do is explain why she needs the scans, but she has to make the choice & you will support her no matter what. I know it's hard, but sometimes it's all we can do. She'll probably surprise you & go for the scan.  I hope so. Good Luck.       PS: Let her know an Ohio Buckeye who is celebrating her first year of being clear of U-LMS would appreciate it if she had the scan. I know the scans suck, but the news can be worth celebrating. 

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