Johnathan Swift is not on the Usenet. Nor is Lawrence Sterne.
Most of the people on the Usenet are technical types who can't
spell "lose" without using two O's.
If everyone on the Usenet were a writer, there would be no
need for the smiley faces. But that just ain't the case. Most
Usenetters write in a "voice," as if we were speaking. The smiley
faces compensate for the lack of nonverbal cues that are usually
used in this type of communication.
::::.-----.:::::<_Jym_>:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:::/ | \::::.-----.:::::::::::::::: Jym Dyer :::::::::::::::::
::/ | \::/ o o \::::::::: Dracut, Massachusetts ::::::::::
::\ /|\ /::\ \___/ /:::::: DYER%VAXUU...@DECWRL.ARPA :::::::
:::\ / | \ /::::`-----':::::: {allegra|decvax|ihnp4|ucbvax} ::::::
::::`-----'::::::::::::::::: decwrl!dec-rhea!dec-vaxuum!dyer :::::