Four Basic Food Groups

[Jeff Wabik]

Nono.. Everyone knows that the four basic food groups are as follows:

1) Grease Group
4 Servings/Day. Grease slugs (fries) count as 2 servings.

2) Caffeine Group
4 Servings/Day. This is an unlimited group.

3) Sugar Group
4 Servings/Day. Unlimited, especially when combined
with group 2.

4) Booze Group
4 Servings/Day. Unlimited group.

Servings:

Although 4 servings from each group are recommended, it is
only important to note that a minimum of 16 servings from
each of these groups per day is the requirement. Simply,
16 servings of the booze group will fill your requirement,
6 whiskey-cokes will more than satisfy your RDA.

Perfect foods are:

Deep-Fried Ice Cream drinks (A spiked root-beer float);
Double Cheeseburgers with slugs (fries) and whiskey
cokes;
Coke is still a favorite, Dew is good as well.

Of course, green leafy vegetables should be strewn in the area directly
around the area you are eating in case you should want to wipe your
mouth.

Voila.

J. Wabik
University of Minnesota - Duluth

[Karl Kleinpaste]

In article <1...@umd-ua.UUCP> jwa...@umd-ua.UUCP (Jeff Wabik) writes:
>Nono.. Everyone knows that the four basic food groups are as follows:
>1) Grease Group

>2) Caffeine Group
>3) Sugar Group
>4) Booze Group

Gee, I'd always understood that the 4 basic food groups were sugar,
salt, caffeine, and grease. Note the presence of salt and absence of
booze. The reason for that set was that Joe CollegeStudent could get
all of them at any McDonald's or Burger King at any meal, any time of
day...and we all know that Joe CollegeStudent doesn't eat the
`diet-correct meals' provided in the cafeterias around school...
--
Karl Kleinpaste

[j...@wucec2.uucp]

The Five SAGA Basic Food Groups:

1) Sugar
2) Salt
3) Starch
4) Grease
5) Pimento

Sayeth Fleetwood, title character in the award-winning comic strip in our
campus rag. Drawn by Steve Edwards in biting, tongue-in-cheek style (he takes
all his frustrations out in this strip). His work appeared in an issue of
Newsweek On Campus a year and change back.

`Fleetwood' is the best thing about Wash U's _Student_Life_ - otherwise the
paper is kind of like SAGA coffee; thin, no body, no guts, ocasional flashes
of taste but usually not.
--
Jason D. Zions ...!{seismo,cbosgd,ihnp4}!wucs!wucec2!jdz
Box 1045 Washington University
St. Louis MO 63130 USA (314) 889-6160
Nope, I didn't say nothing. Just random noise.