Why I do not talk about spirituality and enlightenment : A Dialogue

[Anurag Jain]

Why I Do Not Talk About Spirituality and Enlightenment : A Dialogue

I have many friends who practice different forms of spirituality and a soul or two who are striving for enlightenment (really?). Spirituality, meditation and yoga are seen as means of attaining something called "Enlightenment". So after receiving my mail on the opening of Center for Self Inquiry which questions all this approach, I have been getting various responses. We all live with belief systems. There are not only spiritual beliefs but all kinds of beliefs....belief in the sanctity of family, belief in governments, belief in money and education, belief in success and power and finally belief in God and enlightenment.

It's not hard for anyone to see that with any belief that we hold there is always an edginess born of a lingering sense of insecurity; or it manifests as outright power in it's extremes with various shades in between. It is not also very difficult for a sane mind to see that these beliefs isolate us from each other creating conflict. We measure each other based on our belief systems which have their different scales of measurement.

All spirituality is a belief; a system built to ensure you certain ends, if practiced well enough. I say that spirituality is just another conditioning existing alongside our other forms of conditioning. It is no different from a political system that promises you certain ends and fulfillment of goals. When I say something like this you have the option to ignore what I say, attack me or come with an open mind to look at what I am saying with a rational mind.

Enlightenment is also a belief, not a fact about our lives. So striving after enlightenment is striving for a belief. Before we start striving for anything would we not like to examine what we are striving for?

If what is important is learning about conflict one would like to learn whether beliefs create conflict. If what is important is one's belief, then the door is already closed for learning. It's for one to see this or not.

I am reproducing a dialogue I had over mail with one of my friends who shared with me his spiritual practice. He is a very good friend of mine; one who has stood by me in all situations where many left. I thought that sharing this dialogue would be a good way to go into depth and inquire into Spirituality and Enlightenment.

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Dear Anurag Ji

Good Evening

I am still to read your earlier mail as to why Neev(school) has been closed. I shall revert back definitely.

About this mail,i went through it twice to understand /interpret and sharing the same with you.

First of All -All the Best for this Unique initiative.

Humans always try to seek answers to their unending questions because we think that once we know the answers,life would change for better but what happens is -There comes out more and more questions and Life goes on.

Anurag : I am not saying that we should seek answers to our problems. I am not saying any "should be". I am asking whether we can end our problems. I am asking whether we are interested in ending our problems. But that is actually too much. I am asking whether we are even aware of our problems.

And yes you are right. When we seek answers to our problems, we engage in analysis. Analysis is an examination of cause and effects. We try to study the cause of our problems. But when we analyze, the problem is that our analysis is never complete. Our analysis can never be complete because all analysis is based on knowledge and our knowledge can never be complete. Our knowledge is forever growing and modifying and therefore knowledge can never be whole and total.

When we analyze, we start out with a knowledge of what we are trying to seek. So we are already starting out with a known. If we already know what we are seeking as the end, why is there conflict in the first place?

Let me answer this in another way. When we try to find the answers to our questions, we use an instrument which is our mind. Have we ever examined this instrument? Can mind solve our problems? Have we ever examined our mind?

I am a practicing for the last 12 years  a variant  of  Buddhism started by Nichirin Diashonin in the 13th AD in Japan and   come to the following conclusion(totally my own)

Anurag: You cannot practice a system and reach your own conclusions. This is quite logical isn't it. A system means that it promises you certain end results. When you practice a system you start out to achieve what the system promises you. Can you reach anything else than what the system promises?

A mind which has concluded has stopped learning. Then it stops looking life and every moment afresh. It has got fixed to a pattern and mechanically repeats the same. The mind builds patterns to perpetuate itself. There is great insecurity in the mind. When we "practice" any pattern, the mind stays in the shadow of known, in essence, security. It finds a foothold to function and perpetuate itself in psychological time.

1. Life is a conflict itself and it starts the day we as a newly born baby starts to feel and understand our surroundings.The conflict is borne out desire,expectations and ego.

Anurag: An intellectual understanding of conflict is not the actual understanding of conflict. The actual understanding of conflict is the ending of conflict. So it is not that we first understand the intellectual reasons of conflict and then we practice according to a system. That's what I have written earlier.

Seeing something is not the same as thinking about something. Seeing a snake is not the same as thinking about the snake. Seeing a snake results in total and instantaneous action. You do not think about running away from the snake. When you see conflict totally, there is an ending of it.

2. When we are able to comprehend that every life is precious,unique,has a purpose then all the internal conflicts go away as we start respecting the person in front of us and start caring for his/her happiness.

Anurag: Why do we not look at what we are? Why do we always look at "what should be"? We are not caring and compassionate people. We are competitive, envious, insecure beings. Because we are incapable of facing the fact of ourselves, we build ideals, values and methods. All methods, ideals and values are actually a means to escape facing what we are. We do not want to see ourselves as petty. We do not want to see our selves as violent. We are seething with violence within while we act, profess and practice non-violence outside. Seeing ourselves as we are would lead to a crisis. We are afraid to meet this crisis.

3. Life would always have conflicts because of the  external environment we live but we do have the power to resolve our internal conflicts  and which are the main cause of external conflicts.

Anurag: Is there actually a division of the internal and the external? Is this an unexamined assumption? I am violent, the society is violent. I am fearful, the society is ridden with fear. I am authoritative, the society is run through power.

When we exert "power to resolve our conflict" we are creating one more conflict over another existing conflict. As such I am suffering from conflict. Then in order to resolve conflict, I exert power over it, which means I fight and struggle with it....suppress, control or modify it. Why do not we just stay with the primary conflict?

4. Once we decide to end our internal conflicts i.e win over our Desire,Expectations and Ego and dedicate our life to creating happiness for others,we have become enlightened person i.e who remains un effected  by external conflicts. It is easier said than done but that is the goal ,we the practitioners of this Buddhism look for.

Anurag: See how we identify ourselves with isms - "We the practitioners of Buddhism". Don't all forms of self identification create conflict? Why do I have to call myself a Buddhist? Why do I have to associate myself with a group, a philosophy or an organization. Is it that we consider ourselves, weak and incapable alone? Is it that I am a nobody if I do not belong to any group or organization? Then there are different schools, each with their different philosophies, promising different ends. How do we pick and choose the systems that we follow? Don't we pick them from our confusion? When I am in conflict do you think I can make any decision that does not have a shadow of this conflict?

Self inquiry means that we are wanting to find out. We do not start with assumptions and beliefs. Why do we need to talk about Enlightenment? Do we know what Enlightenment is? It is a mere concept, a projection made from our minds; the opposite of all that we see in our lives as petty, miserable and full of suffering.

When we do not want to find out - because that is too much - we construct concepts and beliefs. This way we resolve the tension, the disturbance and crisis born out of "not knowing". We always want to "know". We want to know what is enlightenment. We want to make a map, a picture, an ideal because it gives us comfort and security. It gives us a sense of escape from the petty and dull lives we lead. In essence what we live is a life of drudgery, starting with our family responsibilities and our boring office routines. We are weary with all the opposing demands we have to meet. Why do we talk about enlightenment, which is after all a concept? Why don't we see our lives as we live them. What we do, how we talk, how we entertain ourselves, what we fear? These are facts, though facts which do not give us any pleasure.

Does enlightenment look like something? Who told you this? The gurus, the scriptures........ What makes you believe them? Why don't you want to find out for your own? Can you find out anything about something that does not exist for you? The only thing you know is what is stored in your memory.

5.About  chanting,meditation etc ,i feel that this is just to focus the wandering mind on one single thought.

Anurag: Our minds wander, right? What do you mean by wandering? Why should not the mind wander? Why should the mind focus on a single thought? Wandering implies that you have created a boundary in your mind about what the mind should think and what it should not think about. Now which is the mind that wanders and which is the mind that decides the boundary and that it should not wander? Are you one of these minds and not the other? Are you the controller and not the controlled? Is there a division in you?

6.Yes,we do try to follow great people like Buddha,ShreeRam,Jesus etc but it is for the only reason that the way of life they led through suffering without losing trust in that supreme power,is present for all of us to imbibe and be enlightened.But it is too difficult for many of us i.e human beings to imbibe but it is not un surmountable as shown by all these enlightened beings. Still there are few who try and make their efforts .

Anurag: Are we inquiring into suffering or we are interested in becoming great people?

Secondly is the whole issue of trust. We do not need to trust anything which we can see. We need to trust in a supreme power because we do not see him. But we do not need to trust that we are in fear. Fear is a fact for us. So instead of seeing fear, why do we ever venture into the direction of trusting something or somebody.

The fact is that we feel incapable of looking at ourselves completely. To resolve this incapacity we turn to the saviours. But this very movement is self defeating. You have started with incapacity and do what you will, till this root feeling of incapacity stays, there is no ending of conflict. Have we ever gone into this question of capacity? Do we need any capacity to look at fear? We need to build a capacity to drive a car, or learn a language or do maths. What capacity do we need in order to look at our own suffering?

And when we dedicate our lives for betterment of others like you then surely your are on your way to that sacred path called enlightenment.

Anurag: Fire does not dedicate itself to burn, it just burns.

Our Nichiren Buddhism advises us to lead a life of happiness amongst all this conflicts. We shall have to go through all these conflicts till we overcome our  negative karma and become one with that ultimate enlightened being

Anurag: What is conflict? Where is the conflict? Before we even begin to look into these questions, we are ready with the answers. When we have the answer, we stop holding any questions. We do not want to hold questions. We are very interested in answers? Anyone who can relieve us from the hard work of holding the question.

We cannot hold a question truly till we are searching for answers. A question is held truly when all attempts to find answers are exhausted. When the question is genuinely asked and held it has the vitality to pierce through all that is known. When the mind has exhausted itself of all the known, then it falls silent. It is no longer seeking, There is just the question and a silence in which there is space for the unknown to make contact.

Have and make a wonderful day as you have dedicated your life to make others Happy

I have shared something from the core of my heart,hope it has not made you unhappy.