What is Self Inquiry and NEEV Centre for Self Inquiry for?

[Anurag Jain]

What is Self Inquiry and NEEV Centre for Self Inquiry for?

Centre for Self Inquiry is a place where people can have dialouge with me on the root cause of  suffering and conflict. Life is full of conflict. There is conflict within oneself in terms of opposing desires, fears and insecurities. There is conflict in the world: conflict between nations, classes, religions and ideologies. There is conflict between man and nature, between man and woman and between past, present and future.

Almost all of us have accepted conflict as a way of life; almost none can even conceive of a life that could be free from conflict. Actually it's even too much to say that we accept conflict, rather we are conditioned to accept conflict as a way of life. So much so that we feel conflict is a way of growth. We measure, compete and ultimately create wars. At a more imperceptible level, conflict manifests as a constant need to become something more than what we are. We want to become more successful, more powerful, more wealthy, more ethical, more spiritual. There is a constant sense of emptiness and dis-ease that we try to escape through work, sex, alcohol, drugs, relationships and entertainment.

Perhaps one in a million, looking at this vast field of conflict and suffering, puts to himself the fundamental question, "Can I live a life free of conflict?" The asking of this question in itself indicates an enormous maturity and considerable psychological freedom. For we are all followers. We are trained since our childhood by our society, our elders, our religions, our school teachers, our political leaders, our experts, to gulp down without any inquiry, whatever they say. Consequently we develop authorities, idols and prophets to whom we look up to lead our lives. We are told about God, about temples, about incense sticks, fasts, rituals and a million paths to lead our lives. All ask you to follow; none of them ever talk about asking questions and finding out about life for oneself.

We are all followers, followers of religions, ideologies, belief systems, cultures, traditions and values. And because we always follow, anyone who asks the question, "Is it possible to lead life without conflict?" has taken the first step towards freedom. He has taken the first step to become a creative human being; not a second hand human being tethered to the world of traditions.
And yet this is a beginning. The moment one puts this question to oneself, "Can I live a life without conflict?", instantly our culture has an answer - Enlightenment. So, the question instantly receives an answer, "To lead a life without conflict, I must become Enlightened". Then begins our search for enlightened beings and their teachings - Christ, Buddha, Mahavira, Guru Nanak, Prophet Muhammad. We look upto them and their teachings as a means, as a method to free us from conflcit and suffering. We begin our quest of seeking enlightenment.

But can following anyone give freedom. The creation of any authority is born out of a sense of feeling less, feeling limited, of not knowing? Can one start from limitation and end in freedom? I am not questioning the teachings of enlightened beings; I am asking whether following any teaching can lead one to freedom?

Unfortunately, even amongst those who are serious about ending conflict, one falls a prey to the almost imperishable desire of humans to seek security, pleasure and comfort. When we follow any authority, in essence we are wanting the security of knowing that we are on the right path. We want to be on a sure ground, we want to be assured that we are not making mistakes. It's like how as a 7th grade student I used to constantly go to my Maths teacher to get every step of my solution checked to see whether I am going on the right track.

Gradually, an inquiry that started from seeking an end to conflict turns to become an Enlightened human being like Buddha etc. The moment we follow, we become a second hand human being. We imitate his behaviour, words, practices and even his dress code. We cling to methods and practices, chants and meditations, yogics sadhanas and discourses, hoping to get what that guy up there got. We want what Buddha has.

Subtly, almost unknown to ourselves our inquiry has shifted from finding freedom from conflict to imitating and becoming a Buddha.

If one has come to understand things this far - and this is extremely rare - one begins to see something greatly paradoxical. The fact is that none of us actually wants freedom. We all want comfort and security, we want to posess and be possessed. We want to belong and make other belong to us. We do not want to stand alone. Aloneness scares the daylight out of us. We want to be respectable members of society - the saints and the revered. We want accolades and praises, medals and recognitions. Damn it ! We want to be someone. If not Bill Gates we want to be Buddha.
 
And as long as we want anything we are in conflict. Desire is the root cause of suffering - the Buddha had said. Whether one desires to be Buddha or one desires to be Bill Gates; whether one is practising yogic sadhanas or one is making money: it does not make a single difference. Though our society calls one noble than the other, both are caught with the same phenomenon - psychological becoming ( greed, in common parlance). There is no freedom till one is seeking anything.

The Centre for Self Inquiry is not a place where one would be taught anything. It is not a place where one shall learn methods and techniques to deal with conflict. It is not a place where an Enlightened Guru is giving discourses. It is a place, where, through dialogue we shall learn about conflict. When people come in dialogue, the possibility of insight into conflict depends upon the seriousness of the participants.

If one is just casually interested in trying out this place as a new spiritual destination, one would be quite disappointed. There are going to be no classes, workshops, seminars, bhajans, incense sticks or discourses.

The Centre for Self Inquiry is a place for anyone seriously interested in examining one's life and the root cause of conflict. There are no methods and paths, no promises of enlightenment. One has to do the inquiry alone. For true freedom cannot come without psychological aloneness. There are no saviours, no paths, no signposts. You have to climb the mountain alone. What I can do for you is to ask questions, help you see those areas where the mind has been deceiving you.

If ultimately one has to scale the peak alone, why does anyone need to come to the Centre for Self Inquiry and have a dialogue with me? The fact is that we are all very heavily conditioned. And the way society exists, everyone around is not only conditioned but re-inforcing the conditioning in you. As I already said, everywhere people are asking you to follow, follow and follow. So how can you ever question and allow questioning to flower? When you come to the Centre for Self Inquiry you enter a space which allows your original questions to flower.
It has to be held in mind that the questioning is about conflict and its ending. It is not questioning about science, technology, religions, paths and methods or how do I get along with my boyfriend? The subject of inquiry is our self. Therefore it is called Centre for Self Inquiry. And to question and investigate ourself is the most difficult thing on earth. If I talk to you about yoga, paths and techniques, you would love it; anything to not face ourselves. All actions and paths we follow are actually escapes from knowing ourselves; subtle and cunning ways invented by the mind to sedulously seek pleasure and keep one enchained to suffering.

So NEEV Centre for Self Inquiry is a place for any person who earnestly wishes to understand the root of all conflict and suffering without following anyone. I shall not give you anything. If at all I shall unsettle and disturb you and bring to light those areas which have been lurking in your mind unquestioned, operating under the radar and holding  you ransom to suffering.

Finally the great question: What are my qualifications to conduct such a dialogue or inquiry? Am I an enlightened being? Has society given me any certificate, recognition or reverence to hold such an inquiry? Am I free of all conflict? Does my behaviour show me to be a font of compassion? Have I written books or studied the scriptures? Do I have sex, get angry and love good and tasty food? Am I selfless and divine, swooning in Samadhi? Do I have any spiritual experiences? Or worse still am I an egomaniac God man seducing women and preying on men's minds to garner wealth?

I know we all secretly hold all these questions and we would like to seek a certainty on all of them. But I shall not answer them for you. It would not make any difference. You have to find the answers to them; if you are motivated enough to meet me and have dialogue.

Perhaps you may come with such questions and discover that your questions have changed. Or you may go back utterly dissatisfied, without getting any answers to the questions I raised above.I cannot predict any outcome. I can only hope and perhaps even ensure in some measure that for those moments you spend with me in NEEV Centre for Self Inquiry, your brain is on fire. The rest shall depend on you.