The Moviesite updates, 29 September 2023
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Ian Douglas
Sep 29, 2023, 5:58:04 AM9/29/23
to movies...@googlegroups.com
Hi all
Holiday time. Enjoy :-)
Six new releases today, but nothing new for the kiddies.
First up, for the teens, is the underwater thriller The Dive. Breathe
slowly :-)
The big release this week (also on the big IMAX and 4DX screens) is the
futuristic The Creator, which is visually stunning.
The tenth episode in the cutting-edge Saw series has been slapped with
an 18 age restriction.
We've also got a new Afrikaan comedy, set in an old-age home and featuring
some of our best-known acting talent.
Bollywood has two offerings, the comedy caper Fukrey 3, and the medical
drama The Vaccine War.
Andre Rieu's 2023 Maastricht: Love Is All Around is screening at selected
venues on Tuesday, and their are all-day previews for the ankle-biters for
PAW Patrol: The Mighty Movie, at multiple venues on Tuesday and Wednesday.
Enjoy. :-)
New this week
* The Dive (13 L)
* The Creator (16 LVP)
* The Creator (IMAX) (16 LVP)
* The Creator (4DX) (16 LVP)
* Hans Steek die Rubicon Oor (16 LSD)
* Saw X 18 (LVPH)
* Fukrey 3 (Hindi)
* The Vaccine War (Hindi)
https://www.moviesite.co.za/new.htm
Forthcoming attractions
https://www.moviesite.co.za/4thcome.htm
Updated the home page poster
https://www.moviesite.co.za/
List of all movies showing
https://www.moviesite.co.za/reviews.htm
Same list sorted by Age Restriction
https://www.moviesite.co.za/showingbyage.htm
Showtimes
https://www.moviesite.co.za/where.htm
Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-)
Enjoy :-)
Cheers, Ian
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A court hearing about theft in a major company.
Judge: Witness Sawyer, are you aware what awaits you in case of false
testimony?
Secretary: Yes, Your Honor, the boss was saying something about ten
thousand dollars and a mink furcoat.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Heard from an Irish tour guide:)
"The fella that invented the crossword is buried in that cemetery over there."
"If you want to find his grave, it's four down and seven across."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Did you know the Origami world cup is on TV....
It's only available on pay per view though.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Instead of partying, my friend goes to the woods every weekend to distract
deer hunters.
That’s how he saves a few bucks.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
What do you get when you cross Superman with a kleptomaniac?
A man of steal!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A girl I wanted to date said I had the face like the back of a boat.
I didn’t reply, but I gave her a stern look.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
As a judge, I was sentencing criminal defendants when I saw a vaguely
familiar face. I reviewed his record and found that the man was a career
criminal, except for a five-year period in which there were no convictions.
"Milton," I asked, puzzled, "how is it you were able to stay out of trouble
for those five years?"
"I was in prison," he answered. "You should know that — you were the one
who sent me there."
"That's not possible," I said. "I wasn't even a judge then."
"No, you weren't the judge," the defendant countered, smiling mischievously.
"You were my lawyer."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A college professor was giving a lecture when he saw two students talking
to each other.
"No talking while I'm talking, young man."
"I was just asking her a question," the student replied.
"Any question you have for her, you can direct to me," the professor said.
"Okay," the student nodded. "Will you go out with me Saturday night?"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
After the honeymoon, the new wife told her husband, “I think it’s time for
you to stop playing golf. In fact, you might as well sell all of your clubs.”
The husband replied, “You’re starting to sound like my ex-wife.”
His wife looked at him crossly and said, “I thought you said you’ve never
been married before?”
The husband responded simply, “I haven’t.”
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
I hate it when people correct my grammar for minor things.
For all intensive purposes it doesn’t matter.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Daisy called her dad, "Dad, I lost my key of the front door, I'm in front
of the house and cannot enter it, can you help?"
Dad, "OK, did you call your hubby?"
Daisy, "I didn't, but he texted me back said he's in a meeting and cannot
come back in a few hours."
Dad, "So, do you have a spare?"
Daisy, "I called him too, but he is not in town."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
I started dating a girl who identifies as a wheelie bin.
I can’t remember if I’m taking her out Wednesday or Thursday night.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
I got zero out of ten on my last spelling quiz
But my teacher gave me an 'A' for Affort
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Google is 25 years old now.
In other news, Leonardo DiCaprio has announced that he's now using Bing
search.
--
webm...@moviesite.co.za
The Moviesite at http://www.moviesite.co.za
South Africa's greatest movie site. Ph. (021) 975-7273
Holiday time. Enjoy :-)
Six new releases today, but nothing new for the kiddies.
First up, for the teens, is the underwater thriller The Dive. Breathe
slowly :-)
The big release this week (also on the big IMAX and 4DX screens) is the
futuristic The Creator, which is visually stunning.
The tenth episode in the cutting-edge Saw series has been slapped with
an 18 age restriction.
We've also got a new Afrikaan comedy, set in an old-age home and featuring
some of our best-known acting talent.
Bollywood has two offerings, the comedy caper Fukrey 3, and the medical
drama The Vaccine War.
Andre Rieu's 2023 Maastricht: Love Is All Around is screening at selected
venues on Tuesday, and their are all-day previews for the ankle-biters for
PAW Patrol: The Mighty Movie, at multiple venues on Tuesday and Wednesday.
Enjoy. :-)
New this week
* The Dive (13 L)
* The Creator (16 LVP)
* The Creator (IMAX) (16 LVP)
* The Creator (4DX) (16 LVP)
* Hans Steek die Rubicon Oor (16 LSD)
* Saw X 18 (LVPH)
* Fukrey 3 (Hindi)
* The Vaccine War (Hindi)
https://www.moviesite.co.za/new.htm
Forthcoming attractions
https://www.moviesite.co.za/4thcome.htm
Updated the home page poster
https://www.moviesite.co.za/
List of all movies showing
https://www.moviesite.co.za/reviews.htm
Same list sorted by Age Restriction
https://www.moviesite.co.za/showingbyage.htm
Showtimes
https://www.moviesite.co.za/where.htm
Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-)
Enjoy :-)
Cheers, Ian
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A court hearing about theft in a major company.
Judge: Witness Sawyer, are you aware what awaits you in case of false
testimony?
Secretary: Yes, Your Honor, the boss was saying something about ten
thousand dollars and a mink furcoat.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Heard from an Irish tour guide:)
"The fella that invented the crossword is buried in that cemetery over there."
"If you want to find his grave, it's four down and seven across."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Did you know the Origami world cup is on TV....
It's only available on pay per view though.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Instead of partying, my friend goes to the woods every weekend to distract
deer hunters.
That’s how he saves a few bucks.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
What do you get when you cross Superman with a kleptomaniac?
A man of steal!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A girl I wanted to date said I had the face like the back of a boat.
I didn’t reply, but I gave her a stern look.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
As a judge, I was sentencing criminal defendants when I saw a vaguely
familiar face. I reviewed his record and found that the man was a career
criminal, except for a five-year period in which there were no convictions.
"Milton," I asked, puzzled, "how is it you were able to stay out of trouble
for those five years?"
"I was in prison," he answered. "You should know that — you were the one
who sent me there."
"That's not possible," I said. "I wasn't even a judge then."
"No, you weren't the judge," the defendant countered, smiling mischievously.
"You were my lawyer."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A college professor was giving a lecture when he saw two students talking
to each other.
"No talking while I'm talking, young man."
"I was just asking her a question," the student replied.
"Any question you have for her, you can direct to me," the professor said.
"Okay," the student nodded. "Will you go out with me Saturday night?"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
After the honeymoon, the new wife told her husband, “I think it’s time for
you to stop playing golf. In fact, you might as well sell all of your clubs.”
The husband replied, “You’re starting to sound like my ex-wife.”
His wife looked at him crossly and said, “I thought you said you’ve never
been married before?”
The husband responded simply, “I haven’t.”
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
I hate it when people correct my grammar for minor things.
For all intensive purposes it doesn’t matter.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Daisy called her dad, "Dad, I lost my key of the front door, I'm in front
of the house and cannot enter it, can you help?"
Dad, "OK, did you call your hubby?"
Daisy, "I didn't, but he texted me back said he's in a meeting and cannot
come back in a few hours."
Dad, "So, do you have a spare?"
Daisy, "I called him too, but he is not in town."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
I started dating a girl who identifies as a wheelie bin.
I can’t remember if I’m taking her out Wednesday or Thursday night.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
I got zero out of ten on my last spelling quiz
But my teacher gave me an 'A' for Affort
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Google is 25 years old now.
In other news, Leonardo DiCaprio has announced that he's now using Bing
search.
--
webm...@moviesite.co.za
The Moviesite at http://www.moviesite.co.za
South Africa's greatest movie site. Ph. (021) 975-7273
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