The Moviesite Updates, 30 March 2012

[Ian Douglas]

hi

All the kids are on holiday now for the Easter break. If you're on the
roads, please be careful...

There's a high-action release for the teens as well as something for the
art crowd and other older cinema-goers.

Note that this is a short week due to Easter, the new movies will open
next Thursday, the showtimes will be updated Wednesday night.

M O V I E S

Released 30 March 2012

* Wrath of the Titans (13 V)
* Wrath of the Titans (3D) (13 V)
* Good Deeds (13M LVS)     
* Margaret (16 LVNS)     

http://www.moviesite.co.za/new.htm

SA Top Tens (commercial, nouveau, best and worst movies on circuit)
http://www.moviesite.co.za/topten.htm

Added US Top Ten. The other industry news on this page is
updated daily.
http://www.moviesite.co.za/news/newsitem.htm

Showtimes (all Ster-Kinekor, NuMetro, MovieZone, CineCentre,
Woodlands, and Labia cinemas, and SK and Menlyn Park drive-ins.)
http://www.moviesite.co.za/where.htm

Forthcoming attractions for 5 April
http://www.moviesite.co.za/4thcome.htm

Updated the pic and quote on the home page
http://www.moviesite.co.za/

This Week's pinup
http://www.moviesite.co.za/pinup.html (for the guys)

Pick of the Week
http://www.moviesite.co.za/pick.htm

All the previews. Remember to check with the cinema first.
http://www.moviesite.co.za/where/previews.htm

List of all movies showing
http://www.moviesite.co.za/reviews.htm

Same list sorted by Age Restriction
http://www.moviesite.co.za/showingbyage.htm

Top Ten and Worst Ten Movies by Critical Rating
http://www.moviesite.co.za/topten.htm


DVDs and BluRays:

Titles and details up later at
http://www.moviesite.co.za/videos/new.htm

(being held up by the Film and Publications Board site not working properly)

Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-)

Cheers, Ian

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An oldie ... worth a rerun:

Murphy, a furniture dealer from Dublin, decided to expand the line of
furniture in his store, so he went to Paris to see what he could find.

He visited some manufacturers and selected a line that he thought would
sell well back home. To celebrate the new acquisition, he decided to visit
a small bistro and have a glass of wine. As he sat enjoying his wine, he
noticed that the small place was quite crowded, and that the other chair at
his table was the only vacant seat in the house.

Before long, a very beautiful young Parisian girl came to his table; asked
him something in French (which Murphy couldn't understand); so he motioned
to the vacant chair and invited her to sit down. He tried to speak to her
in
English, but she did not speak his language. After a couple of minutes of
trying to communicate with her, he took a napkin and drew a picture of a
wine glass and showed it to her. She nodded, so he ordered a glass of wine
for her.

After sitting together at the table for a while, he took another napkin and
drew a picture of a plate with food on it, and she nodded.. They left the
bistro and found a quiet cafe that featured a small group playing romantic
music. They ordered dinner, after which he took another napkin and drew a
picture of a couple dancing. She nodded, and they got up to dance. They
danced until the cafe closed and the band was packing up.

Back at their table, the young lady took a napkin and drew a picture of a
four-poster bed. To this day, Murphy has no idea how she figured out he was
in the furniture business.

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Achar Singh buys the new Automatic BMW X8 sport.

He drives the car perfectly well during the day, but at night the car just
won't move at all.

He tries driving the car at night for a week but still no luck.

He then furiously calls the BMW dealers and they send out a technician to
him, the technician asks " Sir, are you sure you are using the right
gears?"

Full of anger Achar replies: "You fool, idiot man, how you could ask such a
question, I'm not stupid!! I use D for the Day and N for the Night..."

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A man wrote a letter to a small hotel in a
Midwest town he planned to visit on his
vacation. He wrote: I would very much like
to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed
and very well behaved. Would you be willing
to permit me to keep him in my room with
me at night?"

An immediate reply came from the hotel
owner, who wrote: SIR: "I've been operating
This hotel for many years. In all that time, I've
never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes,
silverware or pictures off the walls. I've never
had to evict a dog in the middle of the night
for being drunk and disorderly. And I've never
had a dog run out on a hotel bill. Yes, indeed,
your dog is welcome at my hotel. And, if your
dog will vouch for you, you're welcome to stay
here, too."

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I prefer to describe myself as a "Contemporary Anthropological
Interactive Observer" because it has just the right amount of flair.
Besides...."stalker" is such an ugly word.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

This story is that of a man and his wife viewing breeding bulls. They come
up to the first pen and there is a sign that says, "This Bull mated 50 times
last year." The wife pokes her husband in the ribs and says, "He mated 50
times last year."

They walked a little further and see another pen with a sign that says,
"This Bull mated 120 times last year." The wife hits her husband and says
"That's more than twice a week! You could learn a lot from him."

They walk further and a third pen has a Bull with a sign saying "This Bull
mated 365 times last year." The wife gets really excited and says "That's
once a day. You could REALLY learn something from this one."

The husband looks at her and says ... "Go up and ask him if it was with the
same cow."

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Sandy began a job as an elementary school counsellor and she was eager to
help. One day during recess she noticed a girl standing by herself on one
side of a playing field while the rest of the kids enjoyed a game of soccer
at the other.

Sandy approached and asked if she was all right. The girl said she was.

A little while later, however, Sandy noticed the girl was in the same spot,
still by herself.

Approaching again, Sandy offered, "Would you like me to be your friend?"

The girl hesitated, then said, "Okay," looking at the woman suspiciously.
Feeling she was making progress, Sandy then asked, "Why are you standing
here all alone?"

"Because," the little girl said with great exasperation, "I'm the goalie!"



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