The Moviesite updates, 23 June 2023

[Ian Douglas]

Hi all

School's out, the Cape is cold and wet ... and we have two new releases for
you this week.

First up for the kiddies in the animated Rally Road Racers, which comes
from Europe rather than the USA.

For the adults we have the sexy rom-com No Hard Feelings.

Also opening at selected venues is the local school/dance film Dark Beauty,
but I could not find enough to build a page for it.

There is a film festival on at The Zone with a range of films.

There are previews on Thursday for next week's Bollywood rom-com, Satyaprem
Ki Katha.

Enjoy. :-)

New this week

* Rally Road Racers (PG V)
* No Hard Feelings (16 LNSVPD)

https://www.moviesite.co.za/new.htm

Forthcoming attractions
https://www.moviesite.co.za/4thcome.htm

Updated the home page poster
https://www.moviesite.co.za/

List of all movies showing
https://www.moviesite.co.za/reviews.htm

Same list sorted by Age Restriction
https://www.moviesite.co.za/showingbyage.htm

Showtimes
https://www.moviesite.co.za/where.htm

Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-)

Enjoy :-)

Cheers, Ian

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Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke?

He won the “no-bell” prize.

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A friend of mine went bald years ago but he still carries around a comb.

He just can't part with it.

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Today a woman knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the
local swimming pool.

I gave her a glass of water. I love supporting the community.

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I used to be a programmer for autocorrect.

They fried me for no raisin.

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If a girl texts me in the middle of the night, I text back right away.

My motto is carpe dm.

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My doctor told me to stop singing Frank Sinatra songs as it's bad for my
health. But I just wouldn't listen.

And now the end is near.

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I rung up work this morning...

"I need some time off work." I told the receptionist. "My wife died last
night."

"Oh I'm so sorry." She replied. "Please, take as much time off as you need."

"Thank you." I said. "It'll be about eighteen years, with good behaviour."

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Hey Guys...Next time you're having an argument with your wife, start
undressing.

She will instantly have a headache and then go to sleep.

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A mother ant and her daughter were out for a walk in their underground city.

They were having a lovely day until they came upon a group of protesters
outside the queen's domain. One, with a sign reading It's time to GO!,
spotted them and quickly approached.

"Excuse me ma'am, can you spare a moment to take a look at some alarming
literature and help support our cause?" he half-shouted at her.

The mother held up her hand and tried to pass, but the protester blocked her
and continued. "It is imperative that we evacuate the colony! Did you know
that the dirt we live in, that we raise our children in, contains magnesium
and aluminum? And heaven knows what else!"

Again, she politely but firmly shook her head, pulling her daughter along
as the man shouted after her, "You owe it to your little girl to evacuate
now!!"

After they gained some distance, the young ant looked up worriedly at her
mother. "Was that man right, Mommy? Are we in danger?"

The mother smiled. "No sweetheart, don't worry. Just because they use big
words to try to scare us, doesn't mean the Ant Evacs movement has any idea
what it's talking about."

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A young Apache is sitting before a nice little fire, but he's visibly angry.

A friend of his comes by and asks what's the matter.

-This fire won't make any smoke and I have an urgent message to send!

The other replies :

-Hmm... you tried putting it out and lighting it again?

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I went to collect my luggage at the airport, and everyone's bags were better
looking than mine.

It was the worst case scenario.

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What should you say to your sister when she's crying?

Are you having a crysis?

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Let's have some fun with statistics.
Did you know that in Vatican, there are...

.. two Popes per square km ?

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When the doctor told me that he had fitted me with a thermostat instead of
a pacemaker, I was livid

It made my blood boil.

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I must be getting stronger...

I easily carried all R500 worth of groceries in from the car in one trip.

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Did you hear about the retired judge that grew grasses?

They were all ryes.

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I think I’m addicted to brake fluid.

But I can stop any time I want.

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