iPhones Aren’t Addictive, They’re Just Useful + REDDIT RETARDS REACT TO IT

[Unbreakable Disease]

iPhones Aren’t Addictive, They’re Just Useful by John Kheit, 5 minute read
Mar 6th, 2018 4:21 PM EST | Devil's Advocate

A new meme of complaining to mommy Apple that your iPhone is too
addictive is gaining momentum amongst a growing bastion of meek minds
hiding their shortcomings behind their favorite veil of victimhood.
Today, Apparently, Polls = Movement

The latest attention-whore gambit by busy bodies avoiding their own
failings in life by wasting everyone’s time is sad… I mean SSAAD
(Stanford Students Against Addictive Devices). These geniuses cite (in a
PDF that looks like a ransom note) a poll by Common Sense Media. Sure,
that doesn’t sound like a group with a blatant agenda at all, not. A
poll! Those things are always accurate. So you know, science!

Why not other addictive things?

I wish they would move to more pressing things that we are all addicted
to. Here’s a partial list of things people are addicted to based on a
totally scientific poll where I picked people by flinging (organic)
pudding at a mirror:

Mattresses (I’m absolutely addicted to sleeping like 8hrs a day and
just ignoring everyone and everything)
Chairs (I sit like 8-10 hrs a day when I could be frolicking in
fields smelling roses)
Plumbing (we collectively waste hours upon hours at showers, sinks,
faucets, tubs)
Toilets (how much countless time have we all wasted there)
Kitchens (evil places sucking up countless hours with its apps
including coffee, cutlery, microwave ovens, stoves, etc.)
Bottled water (people walk around these days hydrating way too much
and looking like giant toddlers constantly nursing from their water bottles)
Food (it seems like half of my waking days are spent figuring out
what I want to eat; what a time waster)
Refrigeration (I waste untold hours just standing in front of the
thing searching, for what, I don’t even know; that dirty, addictive fridge)
HVAC (people in my household spend untold time tweaking the
temperature up/down, down/up—it’s an endless parade of obsessive,
time-wasting behavior)
Cars (hours a day lost, just going here, there, selfishly
disconnected from my fellow man)
Credit cards and shopping (so many people are just addicted to going
out and getting stuff they both need and want; they are addicted to
commerce and consumerism)
Sex (how much time do we all waste trying to find someone, then
engaging in it endlessly over and over, disconnected from our
communities (swingers excepted); years of peoples’ lives, just flushed
down the toilet, addicted to the pursuit)
Money (so many are just addicted to using it, thinking about it,
what they would do with more of it, how to make more of it)
…

This ‘addiction’ meme is old

Each generation seems to have this boogie man of “this is too good, so
it’s addictive, so…burn the witch” movement. First TV was too addictive
and society will die. Then it was video games. Then computers. Then we
were addicted to the internet. And yet, somehow, we have all
collectively survived. Yet like other things in my overly sarcastic list
above, people figured out these things are useful and people like using
useful things. And using useful things are, in fact, good. Funny that.

Just Because It’s Really Useful Doesn’t Mean It’s Bad

If I told you in 1990 that I could give you the power to know basically
the sum total of all human knowledge limited only by you having to
overcome your own laziness to ask about it; to be able to navigate
anywhere freely; to capture and share any moment in time with anyone in
the world; to be able to instantly converse with any of your friends or
family anywhere in the world; to be able to share your thoughts and
broadcast them to the entirety of the world—you would have thought I was
overselling a new god-like superhero for a Marvel comic.

Yet the iPhone bestows these powers and more to everyone. The iPhone
makes the Star Trek communicator look like an ancient and unfamiliar
past. To not make constant use of these amazing powers to augment and
enhance the human condition is not avoiding addiction or showing
restraint, but an exercise in extreme ludditism.

Convergence

Much of this supposed addiction to the phone can really be explained by
the the movement of several other supposed ‘addictions’ to the phone
itself. People now surf the internet, watch TV and play video games all
in one convenient location (things all decried to be ‘addictive’ by one
nanny group or another at one time or another).

If you you used to spend 1 hour doing each of those three things on
separate devices, and now do those separate things for 3 hours on a
single device, does that somehow represent addiction, or is it just more
convenient? In fact, an argument can be made that by allowing you to
listen to music and surf the internet and play video games,
simultaneously multitasking, on the phone, that for many people it may
reduce overall time spent on those very same tasks.

When we were kids and played Nintendo sitting side-by-side like zombies
staring at the TV for hours, not at each other, is that really different
than kids sitting side-by-side staring at their phones like zombies
playing games? The difference is now they can do the same thing with
their friends cross town or cross country. Is that more addictive, or
just more convenient?

Your Bugs Are My Features

And phones solve many problems. When I look at the phone in the
elevator, it’s because I don’t want to talk to you or engage in what I
consider worthless smalltalk. This isn’t a bug, it’s a feature. At that
moment, I don’t want to foster a ‘greater sense of community’ and it
avoids the awkwardness of my not acknowledging you by being distracted
by a plausible acceptable alternative activity. But pro tip, when I do
want to engage with others, I just put my phone in my pocket and talk to
people I want to talk to. See how that works?

When you pacify your kids by shoving iPads/iPhones in their face during
car drives, it’s not because you were hoping they would argue and ask
you annoying questions the entire ride. It’s because you want some peace
and quiet, and them being entertained during an otherwise boring trip is
a good thing. But pro tip, when you want to engage with them, tell them
to put the phones away and have at it.

When your kids pay attention to their phones during dinner instead of
engaging in conversation, it’s probably because both of you have nothing
to say, and, many times the phone is a way of bringing up a cool topic
to discuss to kill the dead air. “Hey mom, did you see that Justin
Bieber is dating someone new, check out what TMZ says. Hey dad, I saw
that the Patriots made a dumb trade, did you see it on ESPN? Hey Bobby,
did you see the neighbors dressed their cat and made it play the piano,
check it out!” And if you don’t want them on the phone during dinner,
pro tip, tell them to put it away.

And if you really don’t like this incredible advancement in technology
for your kids, do like Steve Jobs, and monitor and control and/or
outright forbid its use. If he can do it, so can you.

Real addictive technologies are being ignored so people can yell “Apple”
in a crowded internet

Which is not to say there aren’t technologies that are constructed to
purposefully hook and addict users. Gambling comes to mind. Some slot
machine makers employ psychologists to construct mechanisms that are
purposefully addictive. These companies employ techniques that promote
human compulsion, preying on other human frailties, e.g., providing
microbursts of rewards (rewarding sounds and visuals) even when you’re
overall losing to encourage further play. Some app makers are reported
to have employed many of those same techniques to promote addiction,
including games and social media apps. That is totally messed up, and
actually worthy of reporting and attention.

But that is too boring for SSAAD. Plus it doesn’t have the clickbait
word “Apple” or “iPhone” in the title. Not only is there no evidence of
Apple purposefully designing its phones and apps to be addictive, the
company is so goody-two-shoes in its soul that it actually provides
mechanisms to thwart and reduce use, e.g., black-and-white mode, ability
to turn all notifications off, Apple Watches to reduce reliance on the
phone, etc.

Apple is only guilty of making a profoundly useful device that has
augmented and advanced humanity’s capabilities. These ‘addicts’ are at
worst guilty of blaming others to justify allowing their id to run
rampant, or at best guilty of being media attention whores along with a
complicit and abjectly horrid press.

Here’s one last pro tip. If you use your phone too much, and don’t like
using it too much, then don’t.



Now, as I promised, those guys on Reddit are such retards who blame
Apple for their smartphone addiction, well except /u/unbreakabledisease
which is well, me, just like on Usenet:
https://old.reddit.com/r/nosurf/comments/eo92ep/im_so_sick_of_my_stupid_smart_phone/

Source:
https://www.macobserver.com/columns-opinions/devils-advocate/iphones-arent-addictive-just-useful/
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