The Clean Flicks issue now in art galleries
Special Tribune News Report
March 15, 2007 Pacific Time, March 16, 2007 Eastern/Mountain Time
OGDEN, UTAH
In the following wake of CleanFlicks santizing movies in a most
controversial (both copyright-wise and artistically speaking) move,
acompany called Better Art is doing the same thing, only to states and
paintings and what have you. Mr.Don Thomas, a curator for a local>
museum, says that what Odgen's Utah-state mate Provo's (in)famous
CleanFlicks, now bankrupt due to famed lawsuits, as of now anyway,
had> good intentions even "if I didn't agree with it". The museum, in>
question, which is kept anonymous, worked with Better Art to do the>
following
1) cover the Mona Lisa's breasts with a brassiere
2) give the Three Graces red dresses and clothes
3) go over the Statue of David so that "he'll" have Hanes underwear
and put jeans on him
4) put "Censored" over any paintings showing God in a bad light e.g.,
anything with him having a long beard ("God is NOT Jerry Garcia"..)
5) dress up the famed "woman and man resting with naked man at top
ftrame and naked woman on bottom looking up at him" deal maybe in
Anne Hathaway's "The Devil Wears Prada" Prada outfits for her, and a
sailor's suit for him.
6) Take any other nude statues and put a big barrell over them.
Better Art founder and vice-president, Mrs. Jane Smith, said that
"time's come. Nudity is not accepatable,. If CleanFlix (our cinema
counterpart) can do it, in that field, so can we. If CleanFlix (our
cinema counterpart) can do it, we will." Though people have taken a>
liking to the wholesome versions of classic art (statues,>
paintings,etc.) controversy has emerged among purists who insit "Mona>
Lisa should have her boobs exposed once again,..that man trying to
grab the woman's boobs", and "Let David's penis stick straight out.
In fact, some have insisted on an EXTREME version ("You know, like
wasdone with Bugs Bunny in "Loonatics: Unleashed." If they can do it,
so can we.) But most have said that is swinging the
penis...uh..pendulum a bit TOO far.... So as a result the opponents of
this censorship just wanted things to go back to normal.
"The right to dress up art is ours", Jane Smith told me once, and "We
are Mormons, and we will CONTINUE to fight. If neccesary a beyond
dressing hair styles are next..as was the case for GOd..or was it
jesus's hippy hair. We will put Donny and Marie perms on the
people.."The case is still pending.
Copyright MMVII by The Special Tribune Art Papers.