Re: Formality
Hactar
Lee Ayrton <lay...@panix.com> wrote:
> On Fri, 20 Nov 2009 10:01:34 -0800, K_S_ONeill wrote:
>
> > On Nov 19, 6:51�pm, Dover Beach <moon.blanc...@gmail.com> wrote:
> >> The U.S. South has a tradition of addressing women as "Miss Firstname".
> >> It's really handy. �The lady I talked about yesterday just called me to
> >> see if I could drive her again tomorrow (unfortunately, I'm committed at
> >> the library) and she addressed me as Miss <MyFirstName>. �It was very
> >> easy to fall back into my years in North Carolina and address her as
> >> Miss Marilyn. �I guess it's kind of like Russians using the patronym:
> >> Dounia Romanovna instead of Ms Raskolnikov or just Dounia. It's friendly
> >> but respectful; not condescending or diminishing. �Since I like it, I
> >> think everyone should start using it right away. �
> >
> > It drives me up the wall. I don't know why. The kids I coach in
> > fencing call me "O'Neill", which is fine, but every semester I have to
> > beat a few of them out of calling me "Mr Kevin", which sounds to me
> > like something you'd hear in the first twenty minutes of an Arnold
> > movie about him teaching kindergarten, or "Coach", which I just don't
> > like.
>
> When I worked in a large state institution of the mentally retarded, one
> of my clients, one of my _favorite_ clients, tended to call everyone "Mr.
> <firstname>". So I was Mr. Lee, and Barbara was Mr. Barbara and so on.
Did he (B) get beat up a lot as a kid?
--
I firmly believed we should not march into Baghdad ...To occupy Iraq
would instantly shatter our coalition, turning the whole Arab world
against us and make ... a latter-day Arab hero assigning young soldiers
to a fruitless hunt for a securely entrenched dictator[.] -- GHWB
Hactar
Lee <skol...@gmail.com> wrote:
> On Nov 20, 12:51�pm, Hank Gillette <hankgille...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> > In article <Xns9CC941A6826E2moonblanchedgmail...@130.133.1.4>,
> > �Dover Beach <moon.blanc...@gmail.com> wrote:
> >
> > > Yeah, I think we're establishing that there's a strong gender
> > > difference to the practice.
> >
> > My mother said that when she was young, it was common to address a much
> > older cousin by their first name prefaced with "Cousin". I think that is
> > a useful practice. My parents would visit one of her cousins (roughly
> > her age) occasionally, and I never knew how to address him. We were
> > taught not to call adults by their first names, and the relationship was
> > too close for "Mister" to be appropriate. Since my parents never
> > instructed me to call him "Cousin Walter", I just avoided ever calling
> > him by name.
>
> In 50 years of marriage, my mother hasn't called my father by his
> name. Or title. I don't know if she found it useful. I always
> figured it was because he was standing right in front of her and he
> already knew his name.
Apparenly your mother doesn't do the "holler across the house, through a
bathroom door, into a running shower" thing. Lucky you. When mine
does, all I hear is
"Hey Eben!"
"What?"
"mumble mumble mumble, OK?"
(lather, rinse, repeat)
My sister and I call my father by his name. Incongruously we call our
mother "Mom". Go figure.
--
-eben QebWe...@vTerYizUonI.nOetP royalty.mine.nu:81
PISCES: Try to avoid any Virgos or Leos with the Ebola
virus. You are the Lord of the Dance, no matter what those
idiots at work say. -- Weird Al, _Your Horoscope for Today_
Lee
> In article <0d160263-44c7-489c-b888-c93d1bf51...@g1g2000vbr.googlegroups.com>,
>
>
>
>
>
> Lee <skoler...@gmail.com> wrote:
> > On Nov 20, 12:51 pm, Hank Gillette <hankgille...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> > > In article <Xns9CC941A6826E2moonblanchedgmail...@130.133.1.4>,
> > > Dover Beach <moon.blanc...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > > > Yeah, I think we're establishing that there's a strong gender
> > > > difference to the practice.
>
> > > My mother said that when she was young, it was common to address a much
> > > older cousin by their first name prefaced with "Cousin". I think that is
> > > a useful practice. My parents would visit one of her cousins (roughly
> > > her age) occasionally, and I never knew how to address him. We were
> > > taught not to call adults by their first names, and the relationship was
> > > too close for "Mister" to be appropriate. Since my parents never
> > > instructed me to call him "Cousin Walter", I just avoided ever calling
> > > him by name.
>
> > In 50 years of marriage, my mother hasn't called my father by his
> > name. Or title. I don't know if she found it useful. I always
> > figured it was because he was standing right in front of her and he
> > already knew his name.
>
> Apparenly your mother doesn't do the "holler across the house, through a
> bathroom door, into a running shower" thing. Lucky you. When mine
> does, all I hear is
>
> "Hey Eben!"
>
> "What?"
>
> "mumble mumble mumble, OK?"
My mother (bless her little heart) doesn't holler across the house
because she is perpetually in mumble mumble mode.
Which ambiguous phrasing helps a lot if you are trying to get
permission to do something you want to do but know the answer would be
"no" if not for the uninterpretable mumble