Frugal code (geek code)
Dave Evans
The thread "It's a continuum" knocked a thought loose in my head and this
pre-draft Frugal Geek Code fell out. This is provided for your
entertainment only. I will, however, don my flame-proof suit. You don't
have to tell me the code can't describe your frugal practices; it won't
even describe mine: I'd be an E-- if I spent less on symphony tickets.
Not only did I leave several holes for others to fill in, but I'm sure you
have some categories to suggest too.
Appliances
A-- The woodstove was good enough for grandma . . . .
A- A sharp knife and a gas range
A The microwave oven is a real timesaver
A+
A++ I have a smart house
Bicycle
B-- You mean pedal?
B- It has a flat
B I ride in the neighborhood
B+ I ride to work occasionally
B++ I ride 20 miles to work or school in the snow every day
Car
C-- No car at all
C- Rusty or just old
C Recent used car
C+ Still under warranty
C++ Regularly trade or lease new model
Charity
Ch-- I saved this money and I'm gonna keep it
Ch- I donate old clothes for the tax deductions
Ch I donate to a few charities
Ch+ I tithe
Ch++ The more I give away the more I have
Clothes
Cl-- I sew my own clothes from cloth I weave from dryer lint
Cl- I shop for good used clothes
Cl The department store here has good sales
Cl+ I think this name/logo is worth the extra money
Cl++ I need european suits (or hose and heels) to demonstrate my
success to clients
Consumer Reports
CR-- You can't go wrong with name brands; who needs Consumer Reports?
CR- Consumer Reports never tests the things I buy, like vegetable
seeds or bulk wheat
CR Before major purchases I look through Consumer Reports at the library
CR+ I subscribe to Consumer Reports and read it with interest
CR++ I am a model consumer and buy the appliances that Consumer Reports
suggests
Coupons
Cp-- Don't have time for coupons
Cp- Who prints coupons for bulk beans or rice?
Cp I use coupons sometimes for things I usually buy
Cp+ I save and file coupons
Cp++ I sometimes buy things because they have good coupons
Credit Cards
Cc-- Using credit is against my principles
Cc- I have a card for emergencies
Cc I pay it off every month
Cc+ I have a small balance
Cc++ Of our two incomes, one covers the interest payments
Dumpster Diving
Dd-- People don't really do that, do they?
Dd- I picked up a lawn chair at a suburban curb on trash day once
Dd I keep my eyes open
Dd+ I occasionally check some promising dumpsters
Dd++ All my clothes and all my food
Entertainment
E-- There is so much to do here with the library and concerts in the park
E- I have popcorn with the rented movie
E
E+ There's not much to do here but go to a restaurant and a movie at
the multiplex
E++ I need to take clients to the sports bar or the box at the stadium
Groceries
G-- I dumpster-dive all my food
G- I grow most of my food
G I shop for bulk food
G+ I shop for name-brand food with coupons
G++ I just buy the best
Home cooking
H-- Usually eat out
H- Yes, I buy "Home Cooking" brand frozen entrees
H I cook most of our meals from scratch
H+ I cook all our meals
H++ I cook all our meals from home-grown ingredients
Investments
I-- Will the bank pay interest if I keep $10 there for a week after payday?
I- I put a bit into a retirement plan
I I save the max in company plans
I+ A portion of my income is non-earned income
I++ I endow a new foundation each year with my investment income
Laundry
L-- I wear one outfit for an entire week and wash it during my shower
L- I re-wear items, wash full loads, line dry, and have no dry-cleaning
L I wash only full loads and have little dry-cleaning
L+
L++ I send out all my cleaning
Mortgage
M-- I live in a car/van/abandoned warehouse
M- I have a rent-controlled apartment
M I paydown the principal on my small mortgage
M+ I owe, I owe, it's off to work I go
M++ I need another income to pay the mortgage on this showplace
Philosophy
P:MT He who dies with the most toys wins
P:NPR Never pay retail
P:Pri I save on X so I can buy the best Y
P:Do Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without
Public Transit
Pt-- You never know what kind of character will sit next to you
Pt- No public transit where I go
Pt I use public transit occasionally
Pt+ I use public transit regularly
Pt++ I buy a monthly pass
Rebates
Re-- I avoid rebates to stay off the mailing lists
Re- I don't get around to mailing them in
Re I use rebates occasionally
Re+
Re++ rebate checks are a significant portion of our monthly budget
Repairs
Rp-- I needed a new one anyway
Rp- I know a great handyman
Rp I can change lightbulbs and know where the fuses are
Rp+ I can fix much of what breaks around here
Rp++ I fix dumpster-dived computers and sell them at yard sales
Restaurants
R-- I never eat out
R- I eat out with friends once a month
R I eat out weekly
R+ I eat out a few times a week
R++ I have to eat out because I get tired of pizza
Sales
S-- I stay away; sales just encourage unnecessary spending
S- I'm skeptical of sale pricing
S I like sales
S+ I time my buying for the annual cycle of sales
S++ Never pay retail
Stuff
S-- I can move in a hatchback or compact sedan
S- I can move in a van
S I can move with a few friends and a rented truck
S+ I have too much stuff to move
S++ I forget how many u-stor-it locations we use
Thrift Stores
Ts-- I take old clothes to the thrift store
Ts- I don't usually go to thrift stores
Ts Thrift store clothes are good for yard work
Ts+ I shop in thrift stores occasionally
Ts++ All my clothes
Time
Ti-- I just spent two hours welding this cracked penny
Ti- I sometimes spend enjoyable time on things I could buy easily
Ti I value my time
Ti+ I wish I could spend more time saving money, but there's no time
Ti++ Gotta go, keep the change
Thermostat
Th-- No heat
Th- Sixty in the winter and no AC
Th Mid-60s in the winter and I hardly use the AC
Th+ I try to keep it reasonable
Th++ The summer setting is cooler than the winter setting
Tracking
Tr-- The ATM will tell me if I have money
Tr- I balance the checkbook a few times a year
Tr I balance the checkbook every month
Tr+ I track expenses but can't account for about 10 to 20 percent
Tr++ I track every penny, review expenditures monthly, and graph my progress
Television
Tv-- No TV
Tv- I watch only educational programs. Really
Tv I watch less than most
Tv+ Tape rental is cheaper than the movies
Tv++ Wait till a commercial, will ya?
Walking
Wa-- Walk? Who would see my new SUV if I walked?
Wa- I park at the far end of the lot
Wa I walk for many trips under 1/2 mile
Wa+ I walk for all trips under 2 miles
Wa++ I walk everywhere barefoot to save on shoes
Work
Wo-- I don't have to work
Wo- I work part-time and have very few expenses
Wo I work at an OK job and live within my means
Wo+ I work at a high-pressure job to pay these bills
Wo++ Once I get that next promotion, I should be able to make ends meet
Vacation
V-- I fix the house on my days off
V- I relax at home on my days off
V I car-camp in-state for a week
V+ I fly to a hotel on the coast
V++ I fly to each of my homes a few times each year
I know I missed some and you folks MUST have funnier views of some of
these topics. Let me hear 'em!
--
Dave Evans dev...@freenet.columbus.oh.us At home.
Dorothea Salo
B-- Gramma's bible is good enough for me.
B- I have a library card and use it now and then; why buy what I can borrow?
B I keep some good books around the house.
B+ I could use a new bookshelf. Or two.
B++ I can't see the floor for all the books -- but I bought 'em at the
used bookstore!
Dorothea (B++, could ya guess?)
--
Dorothea Salo | High Priestess of Mung
Ex-Gradual Student <*> |
dmrovner (at) students.wisc.edu | http://www.sit.wisc.edu/~dmrovner
Ron & Debbie
Chr-- I go to the mall and buy something nice for everybody on my
list...what the heck! Xmas only comes once a year!
Chr- I go to K-Mart to do my shopping.
Chr I buy everything on sale.
Chr+ I dumpster dive, make gifts and recycle things from around the
house.
Chr++ Bah! Humbug!
Debbie
Roan Croatoan
>Appliances
>A-- The woodstove was good enough for grandma . . . .
>A- A sharp knife and a gas range
>A The microwave oven is a real timesaver
A+ Saves $$ with dehydrator, food processor, juicer, bread
machine....
>A++ I have a smart house
>
>Bicycle
>B-- You mean pedal?
>B- It has a flat
>B I ride in the neighborhood
>B+ I ride to work occasionally
>B++ I ride 20 miles to work or school in the snow every day
Beer
B-- Never touch the stuff
B- Milwaukee's Best Light
B Whatever's on sale
B+ Only the best bottled microbrews in moderation
B++ Using winnings from the homebrew contest to enlarge the house
to hold the extra refriges and kegs.
Coffee
Cf-- Never touch the stuff
Cf- Whatever I have a coupon for.
Cf Saves $ by taking thermos to work
Cf+ Starbucks or bust
Cf++ Knows from bitter experience not to speculate in 3rd wld mkts.
Computers
Co-- The free ones at the library are just fine
Co- I think this one's called a 386
Co Got the best deal I could and am gonna use it til it dies.
Co+ Gets paid to surf from the terminal at work.
Co++ Living off Intel and AMD royalties.
Environment
En-- Burn all trash (even stuff that doesn't readily burn)
En- Figure that if it came out of ground, it should go back in
En Recycle when convient
En+ Monthly volunteer at recycle/compost center
En++ Using money collected from recycling to do a foreign Ecco-Tour
Gardens
Gn-- Windowsills are more than ample space
Gn- A small hand turned plot is enough
Gn Own both a rototiller and jars for canning or a dehydrator
Gn+ Even your neighbors are sick of your free squash and tomatoes
Gn++ "Would the tax savings from a 'hobby farm' be enough to offset
the cost of this tractor?"
Housing
Ho-- Mom & Dad don't really mind "helping me out".
Ho- This apartment/trailer is plenty for the family.
Ho A good buy in a safe stable neighborhood.
Ho+ Volunteer for Habitat for Humanity
Ho++ "You'd think that they'd have at least made the stairs in this
castle big enough to accomodate a lil ole harp." <big grin ;->>
Lawn Care
LC-- What's a lawn? or livestock does fine job
LC- Reel mower for exercise
LC Power mower scavenged from trash
LC+ You can do your own sm eng maintenance
LC++ You provide jobs for imigrants by hiring it done
Liquor
Li-- Never touch the stuff
Li- Grandaddy's still is still good enough for me.
Li Housebrands on Holidays
Li+ You can make several popular drinks without "mixes".
Li++ Your personal home bar contains Amaretto, Cognac,Midouri,...
Shoes
Sh-- Found these in the dumpster, just like new with some duct tape
Sh- Shops 1/2 off sales
Sh Looks for value, not fashion
Sh+ Namebrands for longevity and resolings for frugality.
Sh++ Learned moccasin and sandal making from an Indian woman.
Software
So-- There's nothing like Tin and pine in a good ole Dos system.
So- Copying isn't _really_ stealing.
So Only buys games when they go on sale.
So+ Ain't "Download Zone" great?
So++ Planning on retirement from settlement w/MS for infringement.
All above meant only in humor, folks.
Croatoan