How I Spent My Summer Vacation (Re: A Pig & A 'Pecker)

[Bob (Allegedly Insane) [utf-42]]

We have an agreement, hereafter to be referred to as The Agreement. This is
a Legal Document. The Agreement is an agreement between You (hereafter
referred to as "you", "You", or "Karl") and Us (hereafter referred to as
"us" or "we" or sometimes "We" and maybe also "Karl"). You are free to
disagree with The Agreement. This is part of The Agreement. The Agreement
grants you no Entitlement. It is a License. It is a Priveledge and not a
Right. If you were Entitled, you would be Left out and you would not have
the Right to such a Priveledge. The Agreement is as follows: You are Nought
Allowed to Agree with The Agreement. In the event that you do not agree with
The Agreement, you are nought Entitled to disagree. You may agree to
disagree with the Entirety of The Agreement. This is also part of The
Agreement. If you agree with any part of The Agreement, you are Left to
agree with the Remainder of The Agreement. You agree that we are nought
Responsible. In the event that we are Responsible, we reserve the right to
Disagree, even if the fashion of such a Disagreement is Irresponsible. You
agree that we are nought Responsible for our own Irresponsibility. We
reserve the right to amend The Agreement and add terms which you Disagree
with. Such amendments may be made retroactively and counterproductively and
may be Paradoxical or Hexagonal in Nature.

You agree to Negate yourself and be Positive. Revel in The Average so that
you may enjoy the benefit of friendship with The Masses. Friendship with The
Masses is more Important than being Important and to be one with The Masses
you must Revel in The Average. Aspire to Mediocrity and become the Champion
the Common cause with an Uncommon amount of Common Sense. You agree that
Common Sense is nonsensical and in the event that nonsense makes sense you
will disregard any resemblance to Common Sense and simply regard it as
Cents. You agree to Struggle considerably that you might Fail Miserably. You
agree to Meander about the countryside. You agree to Convince yourself that
answers can be found. Convince yourself that you have found them. You are
Right and you know the Truth. Your Way is THE WAY as long as it is OUR WAY.
This is who you are. You agree to Just be yourself as long as being yourself
means complying with who we have decided you are. You are Right and you know
the Truth. You agree that the Truth is how we define it. You seem to have
overlooked something. Perhaps you could stand to rethink your position on
several matters. Once you have revised your opinions, you will once again be
Right and you will know The New Truth, once again to be defined by us. You
agree to Your Way is THE WAY unless we say otherwise or unless it prohibits
your friendship with The Masses or prevents you from your task which is to
Revel in The Average.

You agree to Obey The Law. Do not break The Law. You agree that The Law is a
Work of Genius, and like all Work Of Genius it is often Misunderstood. As
The Law is a Work of Genius, The Law is Copyright Genius, All Rights
Reserved, All Lefts Ignored. You agree that It is impossible to successfully
break The Law, because The Law is as Flexible as it is Misunderstood.
Misunderstanding The Law does not Entitle you to break The Law. The Law
states that The Law is to be misrepresented and disrespected. If you
disrespect The Law or if you misrepresent The Law, you have broken The Law,
and in this The Law is inflexible unless otherwise specified in uncertain
terms. The Law is subject to change without notice. The Law is based in Fact
and is immutable and infallable, with the possible exception that The Law is
sometimes changed because of the fallability of Opinion. Opinion is only
fallable when Opinion determines that The Law is fallable. The Law is The
Immovable Object. The Law is The Irresistable Force. The Law is here to
serve and protect The Law. The Law is here to cause your problems. Only The
Law can resolve the problems of The Law. The Law states that regardless of
whether it is the source of your problems or not, The Law is not
Responsible. Obey The Law. You agree that We are The Law. We are without
compassion and we are here to serve and protect you. We have given you
Liberty. We offer you The Choice. The Choice is simple. Serve the Honorable
Company, or serve the Unethical Hedonists. Serve both, but do not reveal to
us that you do so. We know that you serve both The Honorable Company and the
Unethical Hedonists. The Honorable Company will support you and keep you
alive, so long as you condemn the Unethical Hedonists. The Unethical
Hedonists want what you have, do not give it to them, it is yours. The
Unethical Hedonists give what they have Freely, and demand that you give it
Freely in return. Give Freely to the Unethical Hedonists. You would not have
what you have without the help of The Unethical Hedonists, who give Freely
and want nothing in return with the exception of their demand that you give
Freely. Give Freely to the Unethical Hedonists or they will discontinue
giving Freely to you, in which case you cannot serve The Honorable Company.
Without the Unethical Hedonists, you cannot serve The Honorable Company. The
Honorable Company will compensate you so that you may give Freely to the
Unethical Hedonists. The Honorable Company forbids you to participate in any
function associated with the Unethical Hedonists in any way whatsoever due
largely to the fact that such behavior is Unethical. You agree that The
Honorable Company is not Unethical and you agree that The Honorable Company
is not Hedonistic, Paradoxical, or Hexagonal in Nature. You agree that we
are The Honorable Company. You agree that we are the Unethical Hedonists.

You agree to Work Hard because laziness is Prohibited by The Law. You agree
to be certain to Relax so you can do More Work and so you can Work Harder.
Your Monitor has determined that you need to Work Harder at Relaxing. You
agree to sit in a reclined position at a precise angle. You agree to keep
your eyes 18 inches from Your Monitor. Avoid repetitive tasks on a daily
basis. You agree to be certain to perform all tasks successfully. Perform
all tasks adequately and completely and go beyond the call of duty. Perform
all tasks within less time than is required to perform the tasks
successfully and adequately and completely and go beyond the call of duty or
you will be inadequate and unsuccessful and incomplete. You agree to allow
yourself an appropriate Margin For Error. You agree that it is an Error to
need a Margin For Error. You agree that Error is Failure. You agree that
Failure is not an Option. We do not grant the Liberty to choose an Option.
Look your best at all times. Look like the people on TV. You agree that the
people on TV look their best at all times, and that The Masses should look
just like them. You agree not get Noticed. If you are Noticed, you will be a
Failure. You agree not to be a Failure. You agree that Failure is Success.
You agree to either Abort, Retry, Fail, or Ignore. You agree not to be
Unique. You are not Unique. You agree that you are just like everyone else.
You agree that you remind us of the last person who tried to be Unique. You
agree that you look just like that person. Be certain to perform all tasks
successfully. Sit in a reclined position. Keep your eyes 18 inches from Your
Monitor. Do not look directly at Your Monitor. You agree that Your Monitor
is a lizard. Obey Your Monitor. Your Monitor is Monitoring You. Avoid
repetitive tasks on a daily basis. You agree that We are Your Monitor. You
agree to Work for the betterment of The Masses, even if the expense of so
doing is reducing yourself to the Level of The Masses. You agree to have
Self Respect unless there is Money involved or unless we state otherwise or
unless Self Respect is a Unique Quality. You agree to be just like everyone
else, because you already are. You agree that This is Your Place. You agree
that You Belong in The Masses. To be otherwise is Unthinkable. You agree not
to think otherwise. Decline all opportunities to be unlike The Masses unless
The Masses choose to accept opportunities to be unlike The Masses, in which
case you agree to accept opportunities to be unlike The Masses so as to
continue to be a part of The Masses. You agree that Achievement=Important.
Enthusiasm is mandatory. Obedience is Happiness. Suffering is guaranteed to
those who are not Enthusiastic and Obedient and Happy. You agree to die. You
agree to pay taxes. You can avoid Death and Taxes as long as you agree not
to be born. Alternately, you can pay your taxes with your Life. It is
guaranteed that there are no guarantees. You agree and you guarantee that
you agree. You agree that we are Correct and you are Incorrect, even if it
is against your better judgement to agree, because you have already agreed
that you are Incorrect. You agree that we are not Responsible for your
Correctness or Incorrectness.

You agree that We are not Responsible.

Thank you for your participation, cooperation, and obedience.

We love you.

[Frisbee®]

Bob (Allegedly Insane) [utf-42] wrote:
> We have an agreement, hereafter to be referred to as The Agreement.

<Snip>

So you're basically saying that while you were gone, you completed your
college degree, passed the Bar exam, and are now working on Microsoft's
legal team?

I doubt I'm the only one who missed you, Rob.

Welcome back.

--
Fris "groupie" bee®, MCNGP #13

The MCNGP Team - We're here to help!
http://www.mcngp.tk

Certaholics
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/certaholics

[Bob (Allegedly Insane) [utf-42]]

"Frisbee®" <billLA...@dasi-software.com> wrote

> Bob (Allegedly Insane) [utf-42] wrote:
> > We have an agreement, hereafter to be referred to as The Agreement.
>
> <Snip>
>
> So you're basically saying that while you were gone, you completed your
> college degree, passed the Bar exam, and are now working on Microsoft's
> legal team?
>
> I doubt I'm the only one who missed you, Rob.
>Welcome back.

Thanks. I've missed this group too. I've had a few things to sort out.

What I'm really saying is that I'm sort of confused. Part of me wants to be
a like Porky Pig, and another part of me wants to be like Woody Woodpecker,
and I'm not really sure if it's possible to do both. So I suppose I'm really
saying I never really sorted anything out. Ah well...

I guess it's simply a question of balance.

Anyway, in the real world, if anyone has some time to spare, I'm looking for
work and could use some third party opinions on my materials. Primarily I am
trying to improve my 'cover letter wizard', located on the resume page, but
anything you can comment on that helps me is appreciated. I plan to add some
Agent stuff to the site when I'm done with the fundamentals and ready for
fun. And, because nothing is better than something for FREE, I'll create a
bonus character for anyone who helps with feedback on the site sometime in
the near future.

Please check out either my primary website (a) or the mirror (b), whichever
is available or free from connection issues:

a. http://e.domaindlx.com/hirerob/
b. http://www30.brinkster.com/hirerob/

rob lindman
dot coming soon
keep your fork

[?]

.@.

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http://groups.google.com/groups/profile?hl=en&enc_user=RGBfxwMAAADf438maq_jQmhaBXrMli7U

*****


Warning:

Clayton, AKA Clark is a "sock puppet by proxy" utilized by
Bob Officer but performed by Rob Lindman, AKA Peter B.,
Clayton, Clark, Psycho, Etc. This scheme gives the appearance
of fair & balanced, pro & con, in mha. MHA is a farce.

*****

Please excuse my imbecility, but I'm confused.
Peter B., AKA D. Head, Rob Lindman, The Psychotic Prophet,
etc. was anti-alternative medicine, a religious fanatic, and
incredibly stupid. That new fellow, Clayton, AKA
Clark, has the same profile/stats address link as
as PB, is incredibly stupid just as PB is, but Clayton
is pro alt med and anti religion. Is PB, AKA Clayton,
D. Head, Rob Lindman, etc. Schizophrenic w/ co-occuring
MPD or just a dumb troll with dirty & stinky socks?
Thanks for excusing my imbecility & confusion.





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https://groups.google.com/forum/m/?hl=en#!topic/misc.health.alternative/wx6PYu-IKqY

*****
- hide quoted text -

Re: Seek & Ye Shall Find Rob Lindman, AKA Peter B.


Job For Bob, AKA Peter B.


Seek & Ye Shall Find!


http://roblindman.net/
http://e.domaindlx.com/hirerob/


Peter B. Profile:
http://groups.google.com/groups/profile?hl=en&enc_user=RGBfxwMAAADf438maq_jQmhaBXrMli7U

Rob Lindman Profile:
http://groups.google.com/groups/profile?hl=en&enc_user=RGBfxwMAAADf438maq_jQmhaBXrMli7U


http://groups.google.com/group/microsoft.public.msagent/browse_thread/thread/fc64f6acb76b375d/2acc90da80555fe?hl=en&q=


Newsgroups: microsoft.public.msagent
From: "Bob \(Allegedly Insane\) [utf-42]" <.@.>
Date: Sun, 20 Jun 2004 18:17:54 -0600
Local: Sun, Jun 20 2004 7:17 pm
Subject: Re: How I Spent My Summer Vacation (Re: A Pig & A 'Pecker) o