giving

[Rick Merrill]

Giving presents to kids as rewards can be dangerous
to their mental health if the reward replaces the
desire for knowledge. Do people have guidelines
they use on when and where to give rewards for
good grades, etc.??

RM

[Mutt & Jeff]

I tend not to reward the result, e.g. good grades. I prefer to reward
effort. Learning and knowledge is much more important then good grades.
Also, keep in mind that social reinforcers, spending special time with the
child, is much more powerful and lasting then things, especially when given
intermittently-no specific schedule or criteria. This begins to look like
real life and forces you to actually pay attention to your child (which is
yet another social reinforcer.) gene
"Rick Merrill" <RickM...@attbi.com> wrote in message
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[Rick Merrill]

I like the emphasis on rewarding effort: good point!

While I agree that random reinforcement is more powerful and
useful - I have to ask if strength of reinforcement is
indeed a valid goal, because the extreme of "Powerful"
reinforcement is negative avoidance, which might be hard
to do with children without causing side effects;-)

There is a lot to be said for regular, consistent reward
- rather a lot like "real life" with a regular job.

Rick
Merrill

[Mutt & Jeff]

Regular, consistent rewards like in a "real job" actually tends to be pretty
boring for children and most adults and tends to lead toward a search for
excitement. On the other hand there seems to be an intrinsic reward in a
disciplined practice, e.g. daily piano practice.
When I refer to "powerful" it is merely a reference to to the strength of
behavioral conditioning, compared to other forms of conditioning or
learning. Unfortunately, any form of conditioning can be used for good or
evil, but I think a healthy guideline would be a child's growth in social
skills along with creativity and an interest in learning. gene

"Rick Merrill" <RickM...@attbi.com> wrote in message

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[Crosen]

If done correctly, the approval of the parent and a growing sense of
self worth works best. Children, and adults, thrive in an climate of
approval and appreciation. A treat might accompany praise but not be
the main focus. i.e. "Lets go get your favorite junk food while you tell
me how you did it."

A used auto might be a good graduation present so that the new college
student might have transportation while away at college. Not a new one.
They'll get that when they graduate, start earning a living so that
they will buy it themselves.

I raised two good ones.

Good luck.