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Last night, I hung out with my good friend Megan who is 25, gorgeous, newly divorced and just moved to a new city. She’s looking to start fresh with a clean slate, and her ultimate goal is to fall in love again and remarry. Right now though, as she explained to me over drinks last night, she’s just looking for hookups with “hot guys…the hotter the better.” 🙂 She went on to tell me that she hopes that one of the guys she’s seeing casually will stick…meaning, she’ll fall for him, he’ll fall for her, and voila!
THEY WILL FALL IN LOVE. Just like in the movies, right!
I nearly choked on my Guinness when I heard her plan and decided it was time for some tough love. I’m pretty sure it doesn’t work that way. I mean, of course it can happen that way, but it’s not the norm and not to be counted on. Sometimes I think Sex and the City has really messed us up!
It’s natural to always want more, to always expect or hope for a fairytale ending. With dating though, it’s safer to accept things and people at face value. If a guy tells you he’s not looking for anything serious, it’s in your best interest to believe him. Pinning your expectations on someone else totally sets you up for disappointment, and takes the fun out of it.
Casual dating is exciting, and sexy and freeing, but it’s not secure. It’s not stable or boring or serious. My biggest advice to Megan was to let it be, and be in the moment on each date she went on. To enjoy each night, each hot make-out session, each flirty text.
And then, if sparks do fly, if there is a connection that goes deeper than casual hookups, she can start hoping for more of a serious romance or sex and the city worthy ending, but for now…enjoy it.
Before you get women to night you need to know what kind of lady you want. This is to avoid you from putting things off and attempt following after the incorrect females. Be more particular, for example if you want a wonderful lady, does she have to be also high and sleek or is your personal preference for females with time wine glass determined. Or maybe you like the girl-next-door down-to-earth kind who is also brilliant with an excellent feeling of comedy.
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Ever wish you could explain to a man the dos and donts of sleeping with a girl? I have, and I’m here to deliver like Dominos. Here are 5 things guys need to stop doing when they sleep with a girl.
FULFILL YOUR NAUGHTY FANTASIES RIGHT NOW
1. Don’t make the sex all about you.
We like sex, too! Don’t rush the foreplay. Don’t rush the whole experience. Enjoy it! Sex is supposed to be fun and enjoyable. Let us feel some of that fun and enjoyment. Don’t just take off all your clothes and lie in bed and wait.
2. Don’t blow us off after.
Important — I’m not saying this means you need to be in a relationship with us — I’m saying, if you’re not into it — especially if you’re not into it — don’t just blow us off. There’s nothing worse. If you’re into us, let us know. And, even harder, if you’re not into us — let us know. We’d rather get a very kind text saying something like, “You’re great but I’m not feeling it” or WHATEVER than just total silence. Let us move on with our lives and let us know either way.
Read this: What Does Your Favourite Sex Position Say About You?
3. Don’t do that thing where you guide our head towards you crotch.
If we wanna do it, we’re gonna do it all on our own, and when you force us by tugging our head down, it’s a HUGE turn-off. Like, HUGE. (“Big mistake. Huge.” — Pretty Woman. Yes, she was referring to the mean ladies not letting her shop in the store, but the quote applies here.) I get that oral sex is really great, but you should never, ever force anyone into doing something. For all you know the girl totally wants to do it but as soon as you make it seem like it’s mandatory, she’s not gonna wanna do it anymore. And you’ll be kicking yourself. Don’t do it.
Read this: 7 Things Men Wish You Knew In Bed
Which leads me too…
4. Don’t make us feel pressured to have sex.
If the evening (or day, afternoon delight, holla) is going well, nothing ruins it faster than feeling like we have to have sex with you. It’s kind of pathetic and pitiful when a guy is basically begging for sex. Sex needs to be something that both partners are enthusiastic about. Some women are totally down for having sex on the first date, and some aren’t. Please be considerate.
5. Don’t try to kick us out immediately afterwards.
Sometimes after sex, dudes get the itch to kick us out. I actually get that. It’s an issue of personal space. But don’t be so hasty. Sometimes after sex, we don’t want to cuddle, either — we just want to sleep. And it can be really hurtful when immediately after sex, you’re like, “Well, that was fun, but it’s time to hit the ol’ dusty trail.” That makes us feel icky.
Read this: 10 Things You Should Never Do or Say in Bed - As Told by GIFS
Ladies, what do you wish guys would stop doing after sex? And guys, what about you? What do you wish us girls would stop doing?
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