Kedoshim: Three Partners

[Chanan Morrison]

Kedoshim: Three Partners

The Three Friends

Three friends agreed on a unique plan. Each would travel to a different land, in order to acquire a special knowledge found only in that country. The three did as they promised; and after several years of intensive study, they returned home and met once again.

The first friend learned how to construct a telescope that could see over great distances. The second learned how to build a very fast cart. And the third friend gained extensive medical knowledge, learning how to heal many types of disease and illness.

The first friend pulled out his telescope to show the others how it worked, and began to describe what he saw.  He could see a far-away town, and he saw people running, looking very upset. As he described the happenings in the town, the friends decided that apparently an important person in the town had fallen ill, and the local doctors were unable to cure him.

The second friend then got his cart ready, and together with the third friend, the physician, they rode to the faraway town.

There they discovered that the king's daughter was deathly ill. The third friend, with his great medical expertise, succeeded in healing her.

The king was beside himself with joy. "I want to reward you," the king announced. "And the reward is to marry my daughter. But she can only marry one of you; which one is most deserving?"

Each friend argued that he was the most deserving. "Without my telescope," argued the first friend, "we would not have even known that she was sick." "But without my cart," interjected the second, "we would have arrived too late to save her." "And without my medical knowledge," said the third, "you would not have been able to help the princess."

The friends were at an impasse. Then the princess herself spoke up. "It is true," she reasoned, "in terms of the past, each of you contributed a critical part in my rescue. But if we consider the future, then it becomes clear who is most important to me."

The princess explained. "Will the telescope and the cart be important for me in the future? Probably not. But the expertise of a doctor is something that I will always need. Therefore his part is greatest, and it is he that I will marry."

Three Partners in a Child

The Torah states:

"Every person must respect his mother and father, and keep My Sabbaths. I am God your Lord." (Lev. 19:9)

What does keeping the Sabbath have to do with respecting parents?

The Sages explained:

"Although I have admonished you to respect your father, nevertheless, if he tells you to desecrate the Sabbath, do not listen to him. And this is also the case with all the other commandments." (Baba Metzia 32a; Rashi) 

But why do other commandments override respecting parents?

The Sages wrote in Kiddushin 30b that each baby is created from three "partners" – the mother, the father, and God (who implants his soul). But this equal partnership is only in terms of the past. In terms of the future, the first two partners, his mother and father, became less important over time, as the child grows and becomes more independent.

A person, however, will always need God to provide his needs. For this reason, respecting God and keeping His commandments overrides respecting parents.

(Adapted from Mishlei Yaakov, pp. 244-245)

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