March 2009 Lower Family Newsletter

[Chad T. Lower]

So my family and I were sitting at dinner and my wife and I were talking about how I needed to write the family newsletter.  I asked, "So what happened in February."  My six-year-old replied:

 

"Groundhog's Day.  And Valentines Day.  And President's Day.  And Black History Month.  And Health Month."

 

So I apologize to everyone for forgetting these important happenings last month.

 

Bella received her progress report this week.  With the exception of handwriting, she was given a rating of "below standard."  Although initially that does not sound all that good, each subject area was rated in 4 ways.  That was the only one of the four she missed the mark.  The other four included things like time on task.  At the beginning of the school year, she was scoring low on those measures as well.  Our hope is that since she is now paying attention and doing the work required, that she will be able to catch up with the other students and be at "meets standard" or close to it by year's end.  Two "games" we have found online which seem to be helping Bella's spelling and reading skills are http://www.starfall.com and TumbleBooks.

 

Malachi will start speech therapy tomorrow.  In addition to having trouble enunciating, he talks very loudly at all times.  He doesn't like people to touch his ears (even to clean the "potatoes" out) and doesn't like music at any volume.  His hearing was tested as normal, but it seems like they are all related someway.  Perhaps as he gets older and can explain himself more, we will be able to decipher the mystery.  He will also be celebrating birthday number 4 next Sunday (March 8).

 

Ali is starting to say more words and say them more clearly.  Unfortunately, she has also learned how to play the game, "Let's run from Mommy when..."  For example, today we played Let's run from Mommy when we need to get our socks on, Let's run from Mommy when it's time to put shoes on, Let's run from Mommy when it's time to get our coat on, Let's run from Mommy when it's time to eat lunch, Let's run from Mommy when we are waiting to be seated at Pizza Hut, Let's run from Mommy when it's time to get our diaper changed.  Even though, it may be fun for her, I doubt Suzy is amused by it. 

 

Suzy is still writing her blog (http://passiton.today.com) almost daily.  She has also discovered a site called eHow which allows you to post instructions for almost anything.  As a teacher, I am finding myself helping to write these articles, too.  Although she only joined two days ago, we have already posted four articles with another in progress:

• How to Replace Car Tires
• How to Make a Men's Vest
• How to Protect Yourself Online
• How to Create a Password

 

Suzy and I have never celebrated Valentine's Day on February 14th.  Usually it was due to the fact that I was working or (being an accountant) she was working.  This year was no exception; we celebrated it on February 21st.  The college was putting on a Murder Mystery Dinner.  Suzy and I had attended one on our honeymoon, so we decided to do that for Valentine's Day.  It was good food and a fun evening mingling with the actors.  Suzy was one of 7 people who correctly identified both the murderer and the motive.

 

In the last newsletter, we mentioned that Suzy's dad, Bill, had surgery to have some heart stints put in.  He seems to be doing well.  At least, his lifestyle is back to the way it was before.  Pushing himself harder than he should.  Going to farm sales and auctions looking for good deals for his son and some Amish neighbors he hauls for.  Suzy will be going back down to visit with them this weekend for Chi's birthday.

 

Last fall, our church put together a small group study based on Rick Warren's 40 Days of Community.  The small groups were called GO Teams and everyone was encouraged to attend during the weeks leading up to the kick-off.  It was reported that over 90% of the congregation participated in a GO Team.  Suzy and I were two that participated.

 

At past churches we have attended, I had tried to take Suzy to adult Sunday School, which she never enjoyed, so we stopped going.  Our current church does not have Sunday School, but small groups during the week instead.  When the GO Teams were announced, I encouraged Suzy to go with me--"knowing" in advance that she would not like it based on her history with Sunday School.  Ironically, it was me, not her, who did not like it.  There were two books we were using throughout the 40 days.  One was a weekly book that we used on the evening our GO Team met.  The other was a daily devotional.  I thought most of the devotionals were dumb (meaning I did not get any meat from them) and the weekly lessons were vague and missing the mark.  Overall, the church had a great response to the series, so I'm sure the material was "good" in its own sense--it just wasn't helping me grow.

 

After the 40 days small group ended, we started new small groups, called Life Groups this time.  The Go teams met at a neighbor's house who had cats.  As I am allergic to cats, I was always feeling miserable when we left their house (and for a few days after).  Knowing this, the current Life Group is now meeting at our house.  The first few meetings were small.  Two of the first three were just three people--Suzy, myself, and the leader.  The other week, it was just four people.  Due to vacations and illnesses, the numbers were down.  Now, we regularly have about 7 who attend.  The Life Group topic for 8 weeks was from a book on Forgiveness.  Our last session was last Thursday, so we will start a new topic at our next meeting.  Again, the materials were vague and I really didn't get anything out of the lessons.

 

Now if you've been following the newsletter the last few months, I have been trying to encourage you to look on the positive side of things.  Do a self-check to make sure you have a good attitude and are trying to accentuate the positive.  Well, I do try to "practice what I preach," so to speak, so each week I was trying to encourage myself to go in with an open mind.  I believe that often times, we get what we expect.  If we go into a small group expecting not to get anything out of it, then we won't.  As such, I was trying to expect to get something out of it, and every night ended in disappointment.

 

But I can't say I didn't grow during those 8 weeks.  I did.  It just wasn't dealing with the topic of forgiveness.

 

Each evening we met, the leader would ask at the end if there were any prayer requests.  Certainly, we asked for prayer regarding our daughter's surgeries and Suzy's father's surgery.  Most week, we would say nothing.  Not because there was nothing to pray for.  There are always things to pray for.  But the things to pray for were small and, personally, I didn't care about them enough to warrant praying for them.

 

Then I reconsidered as I was laying on a table getting ready to give blood.  Granted, this was not part of the small group I was in, but I try to give blood every 56 days and this was the closest drive in the area to my next available donation date.  I drove myself to the donation center.  I went through the health screening where they determine if you are healthy enough to give blood that day.  I went after work which is a busy time for blood drives--everyone goes after work--so I was waiting more than I normally have to.  Finally it is my turn to lie on the table and donate.  As I am laying there, I decided to pray about this seeming small, insignificant task--giving blood.  When the phlebotomist inserts the needle, there is virtually no pain.  The blood is flowing well out of my vein and in about 15 minutes, I had filled my bag.  Actually, that is the norm--that is what is supposed to happen.

 

Let me back up for a minute and describe my last 5 blood donations.  Remember that you have to wait 56 days between donations, so this goes back close to a year.  Five donations ago, they ask which arm I usually use.  I say my right arm.  They try my right arm and get a little bit of blood, but then I stop bleeding.  I ask if they want to try the left arm.  They do and I am successful in giving a pint.  Apparently, there was a tissue block in the other needle that prevented the blood from going into the bag.

 

Four times ago, I sign up for a whole blood donation (one pint), but they have their double-red machines present and an open seat.  (A double red donation is the equivalent of two pints of red blood cells.  They do NOT take your platelets or plasma and they get returned through your arm back into your blood stream.  After a double red donation, you need to wait 112 days--or twice as long--to donate again.)  As I had successfully given several double-red donations in Detroit, I agreed.  They attempted to take the blood from my right arm.  Unfortunately, my arm wasn't bleeding fast enough.  We switched again to the left arm, so I got stuck with a needle TWICE AGAIN.  The blood reached the machine, then my vein collapsed and they could not get any more blood.  An unsuccessful donation, but since blood reached the machine, I still had to wait 56 days before donating again.

 

For the third donation ago, I signed up specifically for a double red cell donation since I knew ahead of time they were bringing the machines.  I sat down, they tried my left arm this time, but that failed, so they went back to my right arm.  This time I was successful in giving the two pints of red blood cells; however, there was a problem when they returned the platelets and plasma into my arm.  To prevent blood clots, they mix your platelets and plasma with an anti-coagulant before returning them to your body.  During the return transmission, I started feeling nauseous.  This is not uncommon as the anticoagulant attaches itself to free moving calcium ions in the blood stream.  You body, thinking it lacks calcium, reacts by making you feel nauseous.  I told them and they gave me some Tums.  The Tums didn't work.  I started getting short of breath.  I told the lady that I wasn't feeling well and felt like I might pass out.  Then I started having problems breathing.  If you are an asthmatic, you will understand when I say that I couldn't inhale.  I gaspingly told the lady, and she stopped the transfer back.  Apparently, I was having an allergic reaction to the anticoagulant.  They use a different anticoagulant in PA than they did in MI.

 

About 156 days later, which would have been two times ago, they again started with the left arm, which failed, and had to move to the right arm to get a full single pint, whole blood donation.  It appeared to be another tissue clot in the needle.  They guessed that since I have given so many times, it might have been a stray piece of scar tissue that blocked the needle.

 

The time before this one, I started back with the right arm again.  Again, a tissue block.  Again having to stick the needle in the other arm.  When she attempts the left arm, the vein moved as she inserted the needle into my elbow.  So now I have a needle in my arm, but not in the vein so blood is not pumping out.  If she takes the needle out, she is done.  They can only attempt once in each arm.  The alternative would be to "fish" around and see if they can get the needle into my vein without removing it from my arm.  I agree and she has her supervisor come over to attempt.  They are successful, but are pressing on a ligament so I am in a lot of pain.  If they push the needle in further, the blood will flow faster and the bag will fill quicker, but it will also be much more painful due to the ligament.  Otherwise, they leave it where it is at.  I am still in a lot of pain and the blood flows slower, so I have to be there longer.  I opt for the later method and, almost 20 minutes later, I finally filled the bag.

 

So this time, a little prayer, and a normal donation--my first in nearly a year.  Honestly, I could care less how the result would have turned out.  If they tried one arm and needed the other, I would have offered the other.  If it was another failed attempt, so be it.  If I had to sit in excruciating pain for 20 minutes, that would be fine as well.  I've done it.  I'll do it again.  Even though I don't care about the little stuff, God does.  He cares about us, not only for the big things like surgeries, but also for the small things, like blood donations.  "What is the price of five sparrows—two copper coins? Yet God does not forget a single one of them.  And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows."  God cares about the birds.  God cares about the plants.  But he cares about you and I most of all.  Even the small stuff.

 

And even though I could have cared less how the result of the blood donation turned out, having a normal donation was certainly a welcome relief.  My Life Group didn't teach me anything I didn't already know about forgiveness, but it did teach me a great truth about prayer and God's faithfulness for all things.  Even the small stuff.