LOVE WORKS DAILY 05/07/07 - SOMEHOW MISSING THE MARK

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May 7, 2007, 4:12:23 PM5/7/07
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LOVE WORKS DAILY 05/07/07 - SOMEHOW MISSING THE MARK
 

May is here, and love is in the air...well, actually
Love is always in the air...if you just take the time
to stop and breathe some in!  Love to you!
 
 
INSPIRATIONAL MOMENT:
(Great Thoughts By History's Inspired Thinking Men and Women)
 
Since the seed does not contain anything other
than the seed, even the flowers and the fruits
are of the same nature as the seed: the substance
 of the seed is the substance of subsequent effects,
too. Even so, the homogenous mass of cosmic
consciousness does not give rise to anything other
 than what it is in essence. When this truth is
realized, duality ceases.
 
-Yoga Vasishtha
 
TIM's BLOG
(Random Thoughts and Tim's Daily World):
 
Good Morning Monday.  Hope that life is bright and sunny where
you are today no matter how rainy or cloudy life might actually
appear.
 
I found out that one of the dearest souls I have ever known
is moving back to Texas next month.  It's a terrible loss for
me and my family, as well, I'm sure, the many other folks
she has touched in the years that she has lived in Oregon.
I am going the really miss her, and I have founding myself already
grieving the loss even though she has not gone yet.
She has contributed alot to Love Works over the years, and
contributed more than she will likely ever know to many many people.
Good news for Texas,  bad news for Oregon. 
 

FOOD FOR THOUGHT:
(Brand New and Classic Love Works Essays 2001-2007)
 
I have often wrote about how things change in this forum.
People move.  People die.  People get sick.  People change.
Things change in general.
 
It's the nature of things....to be impermanent. The only thing
that remains truly unchanging is the fact that things change.
 
Some things we wish wouldn't change as quickly.
 
Other things we wish would change more quickly.
 
One thing I would like to change more quickly is a nagging
feeling that I am not good enough,  not worthy,  not
able to do good enough.
 
I could pull out the comfy couch and we could unpack again
why I got to this place.  But the opinion of my mind is
rather consistently......just short of the mark.  Could have
been better.  Not up to expectation.  Disappointment.
 
Every A- is actually a B+ in my mind,  and that is not good enough.
 
This last Sunday, I gave my second sermon ever.
 
Many people would likely think...HEY, only your second time, it was fine
so it could have been better...so what....give yourself some
slack.
 
Not me.
 
This last sermon SHOULD have been better.  I got nervous,
relied too much on instinct rather than preparation, and as I
walked away from it, I was not happy with it.
 
It wasn't bad, per se, the material was sound, and the
points well made.  But an important element somehow missed the
mark....ME! 
 
I got shook up, got off track...and didn't hit the home
run that I would like to do each time.  That's reasonable
isn't it? BE perfect ever time?
 
And after all, it's all about me.  Isn't It?
 
I'm up at the pulpit to do MY OWN bidding...YES?
 
I don't think so....but that doesn't stop the feeling of
"not good enough".
 
I am very self aware that public speaking is something
that I have not only not had a tremendous amount of
experience at,  but am actually afraid of doing.  Recently,
we were talking about honesty. 
 
Honestly, speaking in front of people frightens me.  But
I am DOING it anyway.  I have experienced a strong, persistent
calling to do so.  I have said no so many times because
I'm afraid,  but now that I am saying YES I am getting
down on myself about how WELL I AM DOING IT.
 
So....let me change perspectives.....
 

I am doing it as well as I am supposed to be doing it.
I have learned things the last two times I have gotten up
and given sermons, and they contribute to the next time if
I am blessed to be able to do it again.  And if not,  that
is also what is supposed to happen.
 
And I don't think anyone expects me to be doing better than
I am doing with what God has given me to work with.  Especially
God.
 
As a matter of fact,  with little or no formal training
in the matter, I think that many are surprised and happy
that I am doing as well as I am doing.
 
WHY, then, am I NOT HAPPY with how well I am doing.  Why is
there always something wrong?  Why do I sit an analyze it for
hours?
 
We do the best we can....and we move on...right?
 
After all, it's not a popularity contest.  You use the
gifts you have to do what you can..the best you can....
 
Yep, that's what I'll tell myself.
 
But I still hear kids on the playground laughing at me,
girls in high school rejecting me,  parents jumping me for
getting the occasional C on the report card and reminding
me that I could do so much better if I applied myself.
 
I still hear ministers telling me I wasn't good enough.  I was
a sinner and that I let God down when I sin.  They forgot
about the part about grace and forgiveness.
 
Those outside voices got me to hearing the "Bad News" and
failing to hear the good.
 
And that's exactly what I do.  I do not allow myself and
grace...and I will not give myself forgiveness. Even for the little
errors.
 
Somehow, I have always missed the mark.  And somehow
a little voice keeps telling me that I will always miss the
mark.
 
What is that little voice?
 
Does it matter?
 
The real question is.....that something...that little voice...
 
Should I be listening to it so much?
 
Maybe it's good sometimes...so I don't get too arrogant and
think that I am just too good for y'all...LOL
 
But, I think the reality is that the sermon was much better
that I will take credit for.  Alot of things in my life
are better than I think they are.
 
And other people give me a break...I just don't give myself
one....
 
Sure,  I can improve.  I was nervous.  Not quite as prepared
as I might have been.  No reason to accept less than your
best on a regular basis.
 
But also no reason to always believe we are falling
 short of the mark all the time....
 
When we do fall short of the mark,  someone will tell us...
 
No point in imagining it in the meantime.
 
I hope you will join me in reminding ourselves that even
when things are not perfect....
 
Not getting it perfect, does not mean getting it wrong.
 
We walk the walk we are meant to walk, and keep our feet on
solid ground, with alot of help, alot of grace and forgiveness,
one day at a time.
 
 
 
 
 

Love In Thought! Love In Word! Love In Action!
 
Love To You Today!
 
 
 
"May we endeavor today to increase our understanding and appreciation of
what others have given and contributed to us. And develop constant,
mindful consideration of how our thoughts and actions will BENEFICIALLY
CONTRIBUTE to others"
 
The best to you today in discovering the answers to life's difficult
questions!
 
 
 
A Final Thought:
 
Love is always the right thing to do. Even if it isn't the easiest
thing to do.
 
May we have compassion for the struggles of others, wisdom to
acknowledge our own, and courage to address them both every day.
 
Respectfully,
Tim
 

This is a daily newsletter of LOVE WORKS DAILY:
A collective of individuals of different beliefs and
backgrounds, dedicated to a better world by living LOVE in thought,
word and action. Compassion. Wisdom. Courage.
 
 

Or read us on the web:
http://loveworks.ebloggy.com/
 
 
Nam Myoho Renge Kyo
Peace be with you.
 
(c)2007 T.Thomas Henry
 
 
 
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