In this month of new beginnings, and blooming
and blossoming, I wish
you all the best of Love!
INSPIRATIONAL MOMENT:
(Great Thoughts By History's Inspired Thinking Men
and Women)
People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes.
-Abigail Van Buren
TIM's BLOG
(Random Thoughts and Tim's Daily World):
I start out today's Love Works with the words....."May be a
little bit
controversial."
That's who I am, that's at root part of my primary wiring.
I like to challenge people to think. Not agree. But
think.
When I worked in the corporate world, I was specifically
assigned to
committees and groups because I would "shake things
up". I was a
paradigm shifter. I was the one person that could
be counted on
regularly to look outside the box, and see things in
a fresh and different,
if not always correct, way.
As a result, people loved me, or they didn't. But at the end of the
day,
I had made them think. I had gotten them out of the
"same as
usual" rut, and got the juices flowing.
Some people really don't like that kind of thing. And over the
last
decade I have learned to temper it with compassion. At one point
in
my life I was paid to get people ruffled. Today, I am not.
Today, I
still see my job as encouraging productive, loving dialogue,
but I also see
my role and finding ways to get people together
rather than just shake them
up.
Sometimes, I still do both. The idea of "wiring"
does shake
some people up. Surely with free will we can change
whoever and
whatever we are at any time.
My experience is that an alcoholic is an alcoholic is an alcoholic,
and
a pedophile is a pedophile is a pedophile.
They may stop the behavior, but they are always that.
Likewise, a explorer or a writer or a musician....is always that.
Even
if they never explore, write or play again.
Happy Thursday to you!
FOOD FOR THOUGHT:
(Brand New and Classic Love Works Essays
2001-2007)
Today's topic may be a little bit controversial.
On the other hand, today could be a challenge....or at least
something
to consider for a moment or two.....for certain, It is
something
to think about. So here we go...
Those who are around me much will eventually hear me speak
of "personal
wiring".
Now, before someone writes me with a bunch of clinical studies
and
reports and data, I want to make clear that I am writing
from an
observational and commentarial perspective and I am NOT
a trained
professional in psychological matters.
If what I write has you going 'Ah-Ha!" or something resonates
that's
cool and I hope you explore it further.
Please don't simply take my word for it.
If you find that what I am saying is a bunch of rubbish....you
know a
good place for rubbish. That said....
I believe that people have a basic emotional and psycological
wiring in
them that controls and influences their behavior.
At any point in your life, you are the sum total of your genetics,
your
upbringing and experiences, and your current circumstances.
It is the COMBINATION of these three element that produce
your current
behavior.
There are those who will argue that is mostly "genetics".
"He has a bad
temper, he always has, he was born that way"
There are those who will argue it is mostly "upbringing and
experiences".
"He has a bad temper because his parents always let him
get
away with it and he learned that it worked to get him what he
wanted"
There are also those who will argue that it is really all about
the
moment.
"He has a bad temper because his wife treats him so poorly, He
is
so much nicer when he is with me"
I DO NOT think that it is MOSTLY any one of these....
You are born with
certain "family" traits, you are influenced
by what happens to you from
childhood to the grave, and you have
(in most cases) the ability to DECIDE
how to behave in the moment
regardless of the first two.
The result of the combination of the three is, in essence,
a
mathematical formula that produces a "blueprint" of how
your brain
works.
In other words, this blueprint is your WIRING.
I could go on for a long time giving examples and showing what this
means.
But we have all known people who are excellent at being
accountants and
file clerks.
I, personally, would end up tossing everything out the window
and
quit after about two weeks. I couldn't deal with everything
needing to
be so exact and perfect all the time.
What difference does it really make what COLUMN I put the debits
in
anyway?????
I worked in a cannery once. All day long, I looked for bad
strawberries.
Strawberries. Strawberries.
After about 4 days, my food processing career was over.
Yet, I know people who still work there (15 years later)...It is
the
perfect work for them. The same thing everyday. Nothing
to
learn. No pressure. A good steady paycheck.
I personally love to wake up in the morning and check my email
and find
out what my work day will be like.
Somedays, I have no work, and also no paycheck....
Other days, I have twice the work I can do....and a huge paycheck.
Could you deal with going to work tomorrow and not knowing
if you'd get
paid or not?
Or maybe you'd get DOUBLE PAY?
Maybe tomorrow you'd be out of business?
If you are the sorting strawberries type....that is your WIRING.
If you
are the self-employed sales type...that is your WIRING.
Likewise, could you leap from an airplane with a parachute?
Could
you sit quietly on a mountain top for 3 days with no food
and
meditate?
Does deep sea fishing sound like you? Or growing
daisies?
Love a good argument? Prefer to stay away from
conflict?
Want to explore outer space? Just want to have
some
personal space?
These are all parts of what makes your wiring.
After you figure in your genetics, your experiences and your
current
situations...you can, if you really stop and look
deeply, find out how
YOU ARE WIRED?
Why try to climb Mt. Everest if your true joy comes from
climbing into a
big feather bed with a good book?
That's what I always try to tell people.
Search. Find out how you are wired. Figure that out.
And then JUST BE THERE.
I hear people talk all about self-improvement, and being
on a path to
here or there or someplace else.
WHO YOU ARE...is WHO YOU ARE.
And who that is ....is WONDERFUL!
It's not shameful, or ugly, or bad.
It's who you are. Set down with yourself and get comfortable.
It is the
real YOU.
NOW, I WILL ADD HERE.
You may determine that your WIRING is such that
you are
a CHILD ABUSER or a HOMICIDAL MANIAC or DRUG ADDICT.
I'm not saying these are GOOD things....and that is where
I get
controversial.
What I am saying is that if your WIRING is that you
DRINK too much or
HURT other people...it does not make you
a BAD PERSON...it simply WHO YOU
ARE...at this time and place.
It DOES make the THINGS YOU DO, and the CHOICES you make not
acceptable
or damaging to others.
That BEHAVIOR has to stop. And you...TODAY...have a choice
about
it.
If you don't have a choice. I hope that your are already reading
this
from a mental institution or correctional facility.
I, Tim Henry, am a drug addict. I have not abused or used
street
drugs of any sort in almost 20 years.
But my wiring is SUBSTANCE ABUSER (among many other things that I have
shared
and will share over time)
That wiring will not change. If you pass me drugs, and I don't
say
no quickly and decisively, I will use and abuse.
I choose to acknowledge my wiring...and I choose to pick
behavior
related to it that does not harm others, including myself.
If you find that you have WIRING that is or will cause great harm
to
yourself or others.....Get on the phone...call someone who cares
and that can
help you. You are NOT a BAD PERSON because you have
this wiring.
You just need to find ways to keep yourself and others
safe.
If you find that you have WIRING that really doesn't hurt anyone
but YOU
feel really shameful or bad about it, I challenge you
to find a way to
embrace WHO YOU ARE. You can be a pro wrestler that
likes to grow pansies
(and wear women's underwear and get
spankings on occasion).
It's
who you ARE. For a whole bunch of reasons....and feeling
bad about
it, or going against your wiring will simply bring
you nothing but
grief.
You may just discover that embracing who you REALLY are....not
who you
think you SHOULD BE....will bring you true happiness.
Pretending to be someone that you are not, for the sake of
feeling
or appearing NORMAL will never, never, never work.
If you are HIDING your wiring because it will harm other people...
or
you are worried it will...
seek professional help today. You may be
right....or you may
just be harboring fantasies and thoughts that will never
manifest
and they can help you embrace yourself without acting out. Only
someone
(and get a second opinion) with experience and knowledge in
such
matters can help you sort it
out.
But if you are hiding the secret ballerina, or landscape
artist,
or nurse, or opera lover, or tree hugger, or long haired free
love
hippie freak inside you.....there is nothing you need do but
admit to
yourself....THIS IS ME!
These things are who you are....and the only person you are hurting
by
not letting them out...is you....
Embrace your WIRING....be who you are....
and let it work....let LOVE WORK!
Love In Thought! Love In Word! Love In Action!
Love To You Today!
"May we endeavor today to increase our understanding and appreciation of
what others have given and contributed to us. And develop constant,
mindful consideration of how our thoughts and actions will
BENEFICIALLY
CONTRIBUTE to others"
The best to you today in discovering the answers to life's difficult
questions!
A Final Thought:
Love is always the right thing to do. Even if it isn't the easiest
thing to do.
May we have compassion for the struggles of others, wisdom to
acknowledge our own, and courage to address them both every day.
Respectfully,
Tim
This is a daily newsletter of LOVE WORKS DAILY:
A collective of
individuals of different beliefs and
backgrounds, dedicated to a better world
by living LOVE in thought,
word and action. Compassion. Wisdom. Courage.
Nam Myoho Renge Kyo
Peace be with you.
from LOVE WORKS DAILY 09/29/05
(c)2007 T.Thomas Henry