In this month of new beginnings, and blooming
and blossoming, I wish
you all the best of Love!
INSPIRATIONAL MOMENT:
(Great Thoughts By History's Inspired Thinking Men
and Women)
I discovered that sorrow was not to be feared
but rather endured with
hope and expectancy that
God would use it to bless my life.
-Jill Briscoe
TIM's BLOG
(Random Thoughts and Tim's Daily World):
Good morning Friday. The sun is out here and it looks to
be a
lovely day. I hope that it is in your corner of the world
as
well.
Today's Love Works is about the fragile nature of our co-existence.
I'm going to say that some of it is fictionalized, and some
of it is
not. That is primarily because the moral of
the story is much more
important than the details. And should
this be read by someone who
knows what this is about, I don't
want any feelings hurt, or that I am
speaking out of school.
It's a situation described to illustrate a point, rather than
judge or
be hurtful a particular person. It's just a story in my life to
be
told. Nothing more.
I really like the hypothetical man that allegedly was involved
the
supposed situation below.
Seriously I do. He is extremely well intentioned and I respect
his
zeal and desire to help.
Sometimes it just doesn't work out that way....
FOOD
FOR THOUGHT:
(Brand New and Classic Love Works Essays 2001-2007)
I found myself unexpectedly diagnosed, prescribed and treated
all in
one 5 minute session recently by someone who for all
intents and purposes was
a total stranger to me.
I was actually stunned and shocked by the insensitive and
carelessness
that was taken by this person. Instead of
taking what I said and
handling it gently and in a loving manner,
I was handed back a sudden burst
of armchair psychiatry
that could have not only damaged a person, but caused
them
to run off and hide and never return.
The nature of it was such that had I been the person I was
say 15 or so
years ago, that's exactly what would have happened to me.
What was most surprising was...had I been the person I was even
just a
few years ago...I would have been quite upset, told the person
so in a not
very polite way, and proceeded to have some sort of nervous attack.
And that would have been that. The end.
But I was quite pleased to view my behavior in response to
something
that normally would have been very disturbing.
I sat quietly while he had to say what he had to say. I
listened
as HIS pain came though, and did realize that he was trying
to
be helpful in this arrogant and "holy than thou" way.
And I let it be.
I would not have done that before. I would not have ALLOWED
it
before.
After all, I had shared with this man some very personal
stuff.
Things I don't go around sharing with everyone.
People in this group know that I have panic disorder, and that
I am an
addict (a addict who doesn't use, but an addict all
the same), and I am prone
to certain compulsive behavior.
I have shared that with all of you, because even though I
don't
know all of you personally, you are my friends. And I
trust
that you will not misuse what I have told you, throw it in
my
face, or try to hurt me with it.
I also shared this with this person.
And it brings about an important lesson to be remembered.
I don't KNOW FOR SURE that you won't use those details to
hurt me.
I have to trust you. I have to have faith that
what I share with you,
and you share with me is safe and OK.
I found myself not feeling that way when I was being prescribed
lithium
and recommended to psychotherapy by someone without any
medical training or
particular expertise other than his own
personal experience. Nor was a
comment like "you gotta stop thinking
so much, it will kill you"
helpful.
Yes, I described ongoing symptoms. Yes, I had spoke of
some
of my background.
But he did not know what I would do with his respond.....
That type to wide sweeping judgment could have been the
last straw for
me.
I could have gone home and loaded my handgun and ended it
all. All
because someone had the overconfidence in their own
experience to solve
another persons problems for them without
all the information or the proper
training to hand out such
therapy prescriptions.
Luckily for him, I am at a great place in my life. Maybe
the
best place I have ever been.
I had been years since I've had a significant panic attack,
I feel
calmer and less fearful and able to do some things
that I would never have
imagined doing a decade ago, and
I have not abused drugs or
alcohol
for over 8 years (the last time being hooked to prescription
pills
that I got while I was having kidney surgery).
I am in a great place, and very healthy feeling place.
And that's very fortunate. Because had I not been.
Had I
been suicidal or homicidal or who knows what...that could
have been just the
event to tip my hand.
I felt very good about my response, and about how the situation
in
general was resolved. I know the man was well intentioned.
But he did
not have all the facts.
But, the whole experience was a good thing me as well.
It showed me that I can handle these kinds of things. And they
do
and will happen. There is no avoiding them. It's not the
first time
I've been called crazy or diagnosed by a
bystander or friend. As a
matter of fact, I
don't deny it. Most of us are ill in one way or
the other.
Some of the more severely ill people simply aren't aware of it
or
won't admit it.
The moral of the story.
Be careful what you say to people. Especially when giving
medical,
emotional or psychiatric advice. Without their
full background or
a knowledge of their current state
of mind, you could be killing them
instead of saving them!
And second, if it does happen to you, even from a
trained
professional, don't let it be the final word. Sometimes
the
person has some issue of their own that they are working out
by laying
it on you, and if what they say doesn't sound right,
let it go....or
get another opinion.
We are all just humans, limited by our own narrow views
of
things.
This last week, I was certain that the box that our new
chickens were in
was safe and secure for them.
So certain that I refused to go check on them despite
a bunch of
evidence that was presented to me. Despite several
requests by my wife to go
them check again.
I was just sure of myself. I knew I was right.
During the night, one of the chicks jumped out of the
box...and
died.
All I had to do was take a few moments to be a little more
careful and
this would have been avoided. A life would not
have been lost.
And this baby chick could not look out for herself when
she got out of
the box. She depended on me to do it.
And I refused due to my
overconfidence and arrogance.
I knew better!
Something I think about, and something to think about.
Love like someone life depends on it. Because frankly,
sometimes
it does!
Love In Thought! Love In Word! Love In Action!
Love To You Today!
"May we endeavor today to increase our understanding and appreciation of
what others have given and contributed to us. And develop constant,
mindful consideration of how our thoughts and actions will
BENEFICIALLY
CONTRIBUTE to others"
The best to you today in discovering the answers to life's difficult
questions!
A Final Thought:
Love is always the right thing to do. Even if it isn't the easiest
thing to do.
May we have compassion for the struggles of others, wisdom to
acknowledge our own, and courage to address them both every day.
Respectfully,
Tim
This is a daily newsletter of LOVE WORKS DAILY:
A collective of
individuals of different beliefs and
backgrounds, dedicated to a better world
by living LOVE in thought,
word and action. Compassion. Wisdom. Courage.
Nam Myoho Renge Kyo
Peace be with you.
(c)2007 T.Thomas Henry