Life Lessons I Learned From My Cat
Maybell Hughs
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Recently, a close friend and fellow security executive asked me to think about some life lessons I could pass on to peers in our community who were stepping into their first cyber leadership roles. After much thought, I realized she had a good point; much of the knowledge and experience you gain as a CISO is not about technology but about people, relationships, and technology intertwined within a business and how the resultant risks impact operations. The lessons you learn from managing these challenges will shape the future roles in your career, and they will directly impact how you lead and mentor your teams. So the article to follow is some fundamental insights that I have experienced in my 20+ years in IT and Cybersecurity. Like many of us in Cybersecurity today, we have had our heads down and worked nonstop during this pandemic. Our jobs became more complicated as our respective organizations pivoted to remote work.
This list is by no means all of the life lessons I have learned while working in IT and Cybersecurity, and I am not finished yet, so I expect there will be many more to come. My hope in writing this article was to provide a window into the challenges and opportunities security leaders face. Plus some insight into what I have learned when faced with these adversities. You will note that many of these lessons go hand in hand with the self-help techniques I discussed in my recent Resilience and the CISO Role article. This is because by incorporating those techniques into your life you will not only manage your stress but grow as a human being, a parent, a friend, a spouse, etc. and the lessons you learn will impact not only you but the community you have grown around you.
***In addition to having the privilege of serving as a Chief Information Security Officer, I am a co-author with my partners Bill Bonney and Matt Stamper on the CISO Desk Reference Guide Volumes 1 & 2, and the Executive Primer. I have also authored The Essential Guide to Cybersecurity for SMBs and Developing your Cybersecurity Career Path. All are available in print and e-book on Amazon. To see more of what books are next in our series, please visit the CISO Desk Reference website.
While I realize some of it is a bit above my kids' understanding at a young age, in general, I've been super impressed with how much they tend to enjoy it, and how much of the story he "gets." It's not just accessible to all ages (the language takes getting used to, but it's still accessible), but it is also full of miniature life-lessons that I have increasingly been pondering.
As I was watching the movie, I analyzed it with the same depth and passion as I would any Oscar nominee. What came to mind was that Rango, the thespian lizard, although forced into travel, learned many of the same life lessons we all havel. Here are some of those lessons.
There are lessons to be learned about life all around us, if we listen. Golf and roping are hard games that teach you humility, patience and self-control. Both are about managing your thoughts, making a game plan and sticking to that plan. One of the things I love about golf is that it takes 18 battles to wage the war. One of my favorite parts of roping is the horses, and the rewards of what they teach me.
I learned that just like people, every horse has his own personality. I have several younger horses I love to ride every day, and have a different strategy for each one. Some horses are laid back, confident and trusting. Others are fearful and have anxiety issues if we mess with them too much. I evaluate each horse psychologically and deal with them as individuals.
I have seen the microcosm of human emotion that is the competition floor bring out the very best and the very worst in people. I have seen it highlight my own best qualities, and put my weaknesses on display for the world to see. And in those moments, specifically in those low moments, I have been forced to evolve as a person. After competing is this sport for six seasons now, I can safely say that I have learned the most when things went the worst.
To add salt into the fresh wound from the morning event, Event 7 was a clean ladder with a 15 muscle-up buy-in and a 6-minute time cap. All I saw when I looked at that workout was 15 muscle-ups. Looming over my head through the entire competition were those 15 MUSCLE-UPS. The cherry-on-top of my not so spectacular performance.
Through my struggles with muscle-ups (aka struggle-ups) I have grown to love teaching them more than any other movement. I spent hours researching gymnastics drills, and watching countless videos when I was trying to improve my muscle-ups, which consequently taught me a lot of information that I have now been able to pass on to others.
*Also as a coach, my biggest piece of advice if you have a particular movement that you struggle with is to put that movement in an EMOM. It can be as simple as a 10 Minute EMOM of 1 muscle-up on the minute. And then gradually increase the reps as you become more confident in your capacity. Eventually, you can put that movement into a 20 Minute EMOM, alternating between the movement you are practicing on one minute, paired with a conditioning piece like running/rowing/biking/burpees on the opposite minute. This will allow you to accumulate volume while also practicing the movement under fatigue, which better simulates how it will feel in an actual workout. EMOMs are my favorite way to accumulate volume in a lower pressure format, which also allows you to become more confident in that movement.
Thanks for the interesting article. I have always had trouble learning and this is my life lesson. When I had problems I often used a service -writing-services-reviews with essay writing reviews for students. It helped me improve my grades and get more knowledge in a short time.
My week was full of new, exciting activities. I was shy at first, before I started to open up to my cabinmates and camp counselor, Noelle, who to this day is my favorite camp counselor. I was encouraged to participate in activities I had never done before, like canoe, climb a rock wall and camp in the middle of the woods. By the end of the week, I was already starting the countdown for when I could return next summer.
I applied to be the Environmental Education Director, otherwise known as a specialist, for summer 2017. A specialist is not a camp counselor, but rather a co-counselor. My main duty was to run educational programs for the campers. This included hikes, scavenger hunts, nature games and crafts, and exploration of the nature center.
Camp taught me that being impatient leads to frustration, which only makes life more stressful. By learning to be more patient, I became more present. Both helped me make clearer decisions, rather than hasty ones.
Anyone can benefit from working at a summer camp. No matter what your major is, there are so many lessons you can only learn at a camp. I credit working at Lions Camp last summer for making me a stronger leader and for giving me more self-confidence.
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When I first started to learn about training, it was in the world of competitive dog obedience. In that specialized niche, dog training was mostly separate from everyday life. You trained the dog to do difficult but stylized stuff. It was a sport, a competition, a mini-culture. I jumped in, competing with several dogs. This changed the course of my life a bit, adding new interests, activities, and friends.
This was the new-to-me world of training that I had hoped was out there. This was the missing piece. And when I finally found it, the lessons I learned caused sea changes in my life, my beliefs, and my behavior.
When Clara accepted me, I assumed that would extend to the rest of the human race. She was young and she had turned the corner very quickly with me. Plus, she was a puppy! Puppies are fun; puppies are joyful. Puppies return our love for them!
In positive reinforcement-based training, we set the stage for the behaviors we want. When our dogs perform them, we reinforce with food, play, and other things that work for that particular dog. But we have to see the behaviors first. We have to pay attention.
But I learned to notice when my dog did the right thing, the pleasant thing, or the safe thing. And this habit spread slowly to the rest of my life. I started noticing the good more, and that led to behavior change on my part. I not only noticed the good, but also encouraged it.
What I have learned from dog training and behavior science and by paying attention is that changing an ingrained behavior can be slow. When I see how difficult it can be for me, it gives me more patience with my dogs (and with people, too!).
Thank you for going over all these important points. So helpful in all areas of life.
But I especially love the insights in helping with the training & relationship with my loving, loyal best friend.
Taking action is critical. Working towards your goals and making plans for the future is commendable and often very useful, but rushing full-speed ahead towards anything is a one-way ticket to burnout and a good way to miss your life as it passes you by.
In general, people who adopt something early or arrive first usually have an edge over latecomers. For example, arriving early at an event allows you to pick a good seat and meet important people. Starting early or being the first has lots of benefits.
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