Why parents should leave their kids alone (Op article in The Guardian)

Paul AH Hjul

unread,

May 13, 2013, 7:29:59 AM5/13/13

to li...@googlegroups.com

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2013/may/04/leave-them-kids-alone-griffiths

Will is a child's motive force: it impels a child from within, whereas obedience compels a child from without. Those who would overrule a child's will take "obedience" as their watchword, as they fear disobedience and disorder and believe that if a child is not controlled, there will be chaos. But these are false opposites. The true opposite of obedience is not disobedience but independence. The true opposite of order is not disorder but freedom. The true opposite of control is not chaos but self-control.

Jaco Strauss

unread,

May 13, 2013, 7:41:36 AM5/13/13

to Libertarian SA

Sounds like one of those perfect parents... you know, the ones with ALL the answers and NO children!

2013/5/13 Paul AH Hjul <hjul...@gmail.com>

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2013/may/04/leave-them-kids-alone-griffiths

Will is a child's motive force: it impels a child from within, whereas obedience compels a child from without. Those who would overrule a child's will take "obedience" as their watchword, as they fear disobedience and disorder and believe that if a child is not controlled, there will be chaos. But these are false opposites. The true opposite of obedience is not disobedience but independence. The true opposite of order is not disorder but freedom. The true opposite of control is not chaos but self-control.

--
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "LibertarianSA" group.
To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to libsa+un...@googlegroups.com.
To post to this group, send email to li...@googlegroups.com.
Visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/libsa?hl=en.
For more options, visit https://groups.google.com/groups/opt_out.

--

Jaco Strauss
Kaapstad

Sasha Hitchner

unread,

May 13, 2013, 9:35:47 AM5/13/13

to li...@googlegroups.com

Not at all - I raised two fiercly independent girls.

I like Paul's words - when I read them I thought , ah, yes.

But it does required your full attention. That's the hard part.

I encouraged arguments, shouting matches, fighting for what you want in any which way you can without physical violence - words, tone of voice, constantly etc etc .. When there was a non-negotiable I started with "This is not negotiable - then without a scrap of trouble we did what we had to do. But on everything else from boys to clubs - we negotiated. It taught them to argue, negotiate and to convince. Sometimes they won. Sometimes I won.

s

Jaco Strauss

unread,

May 13, 2013, 9:54:12 AM5/13/13

to Libertarian SA

Sasha, these are not Paul's words but Griffiths'

I don't think Paul would use false dichotomies like: "The true opposite of order is not disorder but freedom"

Does this mean that "Freedom" and "Order" are mutually exclusive? That you have to live in a pigsty before you can be free? My mind cannot be "free" if my thoughts are "ordered"?

Sorry, but to me it simply sounds like noise...

J

2013/5/13 Sasha Hitchner <theoth...@gmail.com>