Life in IT-Support

[paumenime]

I found this interesting, that what an IT-Support hates the most; is
hearing the phone ringing coz its not good news. Anyway some times it
is allowed but times like this: NEVER:

1. when a users nows what the problem is and is even telling you what
you should do or fix (why did they even call you in the first place)
2. somebody calling you to report a printer is not working and in
actual fact it doesn't have papers or even it is not switched on.
3. ...........................just chill, the phone just rang and I
have to attend to it coz somoene called and didn't even say what the
problem is.............only to find out it is the computer hanged and
they don't know how to restart.
4. somoene calling you all the way from the ground floor to the second
floor, only to tell you that the situation is now ok. Thanks though.
5. or worse still a case scenario like this:
Tech Support: 'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop'.
Customer: 'OK'.
Tech Support: 'Did you get a pop-up menu?'.
Customer: 'No'.
Tech Support: 'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
Customer: 'No'.
Tech Support: 'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up
until this point?'.
Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote
'click''.

na bado:

Tech Support: 'OK. In the bottom left hand side of the
screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?'
Customer: 'Wow. How can you see my screen from there?'


ok let me just vumilia

Caller: 'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just
realised that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks will
I have my file back again?'.

or worse still:
Caller: 'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?'
Tech Support: 'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are
talking about'.
Caller: 'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly
states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket
and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number
for Jack?'
Tech Support: 'I think you mean the telephone point on the wall'.


6. There's always one more. This has got to be one of the funniest
things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not
fired. This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was
transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department.
Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is
currently suing the Word Perfect organization for 'Termination without
Cause'.
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.
(Now I know why they record these conversations!):
Tech Support: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help
you?'
Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
Tech Support: 'What sort of trouble??'
Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a
sudden the words went away.'
Tech Support: 'Went away?'
Caller: 'They disappeared.'
Tech Support: 'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?'
Caller: 'Nothing.'
Tech Support: 'Nothing??'
Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I
type.'
Tech Support: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get
out??'
Caller: 'How do I tell?'
Tech Support: 'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??'
Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'
Tech Support: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the
screen?'
Caller: 'There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't
accept anything I type.'
Tech Support: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'
Caller: 'What's a monitor?'
Tech Support: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks
like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??'
Caller: 'I don't know.'
Tech Support: 'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and
find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'
Caller: 'Yes, I think so.'
Tech Support: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me
if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: 'Yes, it is.'
Tech Support: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you
notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not
just one??'
Caller: 'No.'
Tech Support: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there
again and find the other cable.'
Caller: 'Okay, here it is.'
Tech Support: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged
securely into the back of your computer.'
Caller: 'I can't reach.'
Tech Support: 'Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??'
Caller: 'No.'
Tech Support: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something
and lean way over??'
Caller: 'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right
angle - it's because it's dark.'
Tech Support: 'Dark??'
Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only
light I have is coming in from the window.
Tech Support: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'
Caller: 'I can't.'
Tech Support: 'No? Why not??'
Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.'
Tech Support: 'A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay,
we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your
computer came in??'
Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'
Tech Support: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and
pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the
store you bought it from.'
Caller: 'Really? Is it that bad?'
Tech Support: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'
Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell
them??'
Tech Support: 'Tell them you're too f --- ing stupid to own a
computer!!!!!


7. now I have to pick a real case scenario phone, so guys finish this
up for me. Thanks