Mom, Can you judge this essay contest?
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Jennifer Mills
Jun 7, 2015, 10:18:13 AM6/7/15
to Carol Brown-Mills, io-harold-team@googlegroups.com,
Hi Mom,
I offered up your services to my old improv team as an essay contest judge. The following explains the situation, and the two submissions are below. It should be noted that essay #2 goes three words above the word count, and that will be your decision if that counts as a disqualification or not. You could also choose to take out three words of your choice and judge the essay accordingly. If you agree to take on this major role, when you have made your decision, you can reply all to this email with your conclusions. Everyone is dying to know.
Thanks Mom!
Love,
Jennifer
Dear Apollo,
>> Today I was cleaning out some things, and I found our pink piggie bank. It has $9.00 and change in it. As the treasurer, I would like to propose an essay contest to former memebers of Apollo with a cash prize of $9.00. If you'd like to be entered in the contest, please reply to this email with a 200 word essay about why you think you deserve the money, how you will use it, and what it will mean to you. For an impartial judge, I will forward the essays to my mother who will choose the winner. Please also include your mailing address. If you win, you will receive a check for $9.00 in the mail. I will use the change for the stamp.
Essay #1
$9.00 - An Essay
When I was a child growing up in Los Angeles I didn't have a lot of toys, I didn't have a lot of TV channels, and I didn't have a lot of friends. What I did have is one tree in my small backyard. That tree represented hope to me. It represented something that I've always wanted and that was a tree house. With a tree house maybe I could invite people over. Maybe they would want to climb the rope ladder and look over other people's yards. Maybe I would have friends. Determined to build this treehouse I walked down to the Home Depot. I grabbed a large push cart and I went up and down every aisle picking out the best of the best in supplies. Treated oak, reinforced nails, and rope made from the finest Brazilian nylon. I went through the checkout line and guess how much they wanted? $3009 - Just $9 more than the $3000 I had stolen from a bank. I wasn't interested in compromising the integrity of my tree house. So I told them to put it all back. I still have that stollen $3000 and am just waiting on that magical $9.
Essay #2
$9.00- An Essay
Do you know how much it costs to buy a house? Do you know how much it costs to hire movers to pack up all your possessions and put them in a box made of cardboard, move them to a large truck, and store them in a warehouse in Skokie? Do you know how much it costs set up an account with the Gas company, the Water company, the Internet Company, and the Electric Company? Do you know how much it costs to eat out every day because you’re in temporary housing and don’t have a functional kitchen? Do you know how much it costs to not get a paycheck for two weeks because you had to take a week off work to switch jobs? Do you know how much new furniture costs because it doesn’t “look right” in a new house? Do you know how much it costs to find the “right vibe”? Do you know how much these things cost? I do. I do, because I’m living them ALL, right now. And they cost $9.00. Together. $9.00 is the price of transition, and I could really use $9.00 right now. Thank you for your consideration. Long live Minnesota!
I offered up your services to my old improv team as an essay contest judge. The following explains the situation, and the two submissions are below. It should be noted that essay #2 goes three words above the word count, and that will be your decision if that counts as a disqualification or not. You could also choose to take out three words of your choice and judge the essay accordingly. If you agree to take on this major role, when you have made your decision, you can reply all to this email with your conclusions. Everyone is dying to know.
Thanks Mom!
Love,
Jennifer
Dear Apollo,
>> Today I was cleaning out some things, and I found our pink piggie bank. It has $9.00 and change in it. As the treasurer, I would like to propose an essay contest to former memebers of Apollo with a cash prize of $9.00. If you'd like to be entered in the contest, please reply to this email with a 200 word essay about why you think you deserve the money, how you will use it, and what it will mean to you. For an impartial judge, I will forward the essays to my mother who will choose the winner. Please also include your mailing address. If you win, you will receive a check for $9.00 in the mail. I will use the change for the stamp.
Essay #1
$9.00 - An Essay
When I was a child growing up in Los Angeles I didn't have a lot of toys, I didn't have a lot of TV channels, and I didn't have a lot of friends. What I did have is one tree in my small backyard. That tree represented hope to me. It represented something that I've always wanted and that was a tree house. With a tree house maybe I could invite people over. Maybe they would want to climb the rope ladder and look over other people's yards. Maybe I would have friends. Determined to build this treehouse I walked down to the Home Depot. I grabbed a large push cart and I went up and down every aisle picking out the best of the best in supplies. Treated oak, reinforced nails, and rope made from the finest Brazilian nylon. I went through the checkout line and guess how much they wanted? $3009 - Just $9 more than the $3000 I had stolen from a bank. I wasn't interested in compromising the integrity of my tree house. So I told them to put it all back. I still have that stollen $3000 and am just waiting on that magical $9.
Essay #2
$9.00- An Essay
Do you know how much it costs to buy a house? Do you know how much it costs to hire movers to pack up all your possessions and put them in a box made of cardboard, move them to a large truck, and store them in a warehouse in Skokie? Do you know how much it costs set up an account with the Gas company, the Water company, the Internet Company, and the Electric Company? Do you know how much it costs to eat out every day because you’re in temporary housing and don’t have a functional kitchen? Do you know how much it costs to not get a paycheck for two weeks because you had to take a week off work to switch jobs? Do you know how much new furniture costs because it doesn’t “look right” in a new house? Do you know how much it costs to find the “right vibe”? Do you know how much these things cost? I do. I do, because I’m living them ALL, right now. And they cost $9.00. Together. $9.00 is the price of transition, and I could really use $9.00 right now. Thank you for your consideration. Long live Minnesota!
Jennifer Mills Mills
Jun 7, 2015, 6:47:48 PM6/7/15
to Carol Brown Mills, io-harold-team
Dear Mother, Dear Apollo,
I speak on behalf of all of us when I thank Carol Mills for her fair and thorough judging. Congratulations Robert Bacon on your win, and Jacob excellent attempt. Bacon, I will be sending you a check for $9.00, and will promptly use the cash for laundry. If Bacon so chooses, when we have a reunion pizza party, he can decide if he wants to use his winnings to pay the tip.
Congrats team on an excellent essay contest!
Love,
Jennifer
On Sun, Jun 7, 2015 at 3:21 PM, Carol Brown Mills <carolbr...@earthlink.net> wrote:
Dear Apollo:
Thank you for the privilege of judging your $9.00 essay contest! I have read and re-read the entries, and here is my decision:
As I have gone through many, many moves in my life like the writer of Essay #2, I believe he or she probably needs the money the most. But you have a new job, new home, and new furniture "with vibes" so when the dust settles, you are going to be OK. (plus you went over by 3 words)
So, I award the grand prize to the writer of Essay #1, whose beautiful dream of a treehouse of uncompromised quality is only awaiting the "magical $9" to make it come true and bring him or her long-awaited friends and happiness. (I would not be a mother if I didn't mention my disappointment in how you earned the other $3000)
Congratulations to all the creative contestants!
Daniel Armstrong
Jun 9, 2015, 9:36:54 AM6/9/15
to Jennifer Mills Mills, io-harold-team, Carol Brown-Mills
Ahh damn, I could have used that $ towards a fat sack of weed. Love Ya'll!
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Jennifer Mills
Jun 9, 2015, 10:41:29 AM6/9/15
to Daniel Armstrong, io-harold-team, Carol Brown-Mills
Hey mom,
Do you want to reconsider the winner after reading dan's essay?
Sent from my iPad
Sent from my iPad
Lindsey Smith
Jun 9, 2015, 10:45:14 AM6/9/15
to Jennifer Mills, Daniel Armstrong, io-harold-team, Carol Brown-Mills
hahahahahaha
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