sense of responsibility

[International Adoption]

Main  provision of this Chapter can be formulated as follows:
are you satisfied with your child to the extent to which he or she
meet the standards of society; as much as it is, and you
and your child are deceived, confused; instead, you
must learn to feel satisfaction at manifestation by your child
unique ability to make independent decisions.
 Three steps you can take in this direction are as follows:
 1. Take note of any manifestations of his habits to make decisions for
the baby and start to get rid of, get rid of it.
     2. Learn to derive pleasure from decisionmaking by your child.
     3. Change some of your thoughts and beliefs about your
child.
 The work offered you in Chapter 2 and consisting in the transfer of the child
responsibility for points from the list events of life of the child is a good beginning
for development you first of these three steps.
 The second step associated with receiving more pleasure from the ability
the child to make decisions and from those decisions, it is useful for you
and for your child. Inner self of the person extends and develops, when
he or she is surrounded by people who are highly appreciating it I and receiving pleasure
from the observation of how it operates. All this you can give your
child  if you realize that before you the live, pulsing particle most
reality and you have a precious but fleeting opportunity to see
her, to learn from it and receive from it pleasure. You will certainly need
to practice, before you can receive any pleasure from
those, now you are upsetting the decisions taken by the child. But,
freed from the sense of responsibility for them, you'll find: 
it's easier to notice enthusiasm, humour and humanity in this or that conflict
situation. Maybe some small part of your being alreadynotices
it; may be, something, being as if behind your consciousness and mind,
sometimes feels surge in surprise and affection by the child's actions, experiences
a subtle sense of belonging to those naive and illogical searches, with
by which he or she is trying to find his place in the world, and the feeling
how all this is human, inconsistent, vulnerable and defenseless. These
experiences represent your reaction to the touch of life itself, and
any, even very small fragment of such experiences cannot fail
good.

[Mark Segal]

It turned out in the hot season to stay in the South, the boy was not
the condition. But in it lived the dream to see the sea and mountains, and large
stars in the dark southern sky. Parents, people of modest incomes, few
months put money on this short trip, did Not calculate,
how much and what you could buy instead of a few sunrises in the mountains and
evenings under the stars with a big moonlight in the sea yeah two or three sea
bathing (because it was still cold sea), from which the health of any
good. Probably, except for the bright impressions of the nature of the Crimea, the children will take away from
this expensive and "impractical" trip a very valuable experience: the case of
a history of generosity to yourself. Not greedy consumerism, mindless
prodigality, namely generosity, you need to be able to show and to  themselves.
Because of the soul need to think. Not only in the sense that
it was clean, but in the sense that was alive - alive with joy and
freedom.

[Mark Segal]

Recently I read an article in the paper. It was about excessively
expensive weddings. Not without reason the author criticized among some
the Central Asian republics of the custom that the family of the groom growing up,
over the years, largely denying myself, saving up for a Grand wedding with "that". It
indeed not a holiday, and not the free movement of the soul, and tyranny
custom, in which healthy start hypertrophied and distorted. But when
in the articles "wedding theme", we begin to boring to talk about what
useful for life things could acquire young to replace "unnecessary"
Banquet, when tally the number of optional, close enough
was at the table of consumers, then, right? Oh, come now,
because the wedding is not every year, because it is a wedding to remember.
Of course, not a drunk scream and a brutal hangover. But it is and not petty
care about how "careful fit". And then you add and
such suggestion: "six Months together to live, and debts for a year
enough." It's obvious immorality under the mask of reasonableness.