The Naked Bond - A Relationship Journey

[Zeeshan Ali Sajwani]

The Naked Bond - A Relationship Journey
By: Zeeshan Sajwani

Dating and marriage is different than it was twenty years ago. In today's society, more than 50% of all marriages fail for one reason or another. Just thinking about that makes "commitment" seem scary. It seems that when relationships are faced with challenges, people quit trying. Dating is more like a marathon, trying to date as many people as possible, instead of taking time to get to know someone at a deeper level. For married couples, divorce is not biased. Whether married for thirty years or eight months, the outcome can be the same.

Think of it like choosing a car. You pick out the make, model, year, color, and features that you believe are best for you. After driving your car for a couple of months, you realize that perhaps you should have purchased a larger car, or that maybe the leather seats would have been better, or on hot sunny days, the sunroof would have been nice. However, it is now too
late so you choose to keep your car and make it work. It is the same for marriage. Not everything will be perfect and there will be major obstacles to overcome but you have made your decision and now you choose to make it work.

There could be thousands of things we can do to better our relationship. To help get us headed in the right direction, below are few ways to build, strengthen, and enhance our relationship.

• Start Over - Read it Carefully

When couples first get together, everything is new and exciting. They overlook the little annoying things the other person does. However, after time, the nagging starts, instead of hearing, "You look beautiful," they might hear "Why are you wearing that shirt?" If this sounds like your relationship, first, the two of you need to sit down and be honest that things have changed. Identify the things each other did in the beginning of the relationship that created the
attraction in the first place. Then together, make a commitment to start over. The truth is, both of you will have to work on this. It will not automatically be easy but it is possible. Start by forgiving each other, forgetting the past, and then start over with the flirtation. Focus only on the special things your mate does and relearn to put the unimportant things aside. It will take some time so be patient.

If I share my personal experience, during my initial called loving days, I was keen to see display pictures of my sweetheart on messenger services but with the time, it started irritating me. We both realized that things have been changed and there are conflict of interests which made our life more miserable.

These kind of situations are very common in all cases. What all we need is to manage our relationships accordingly. Couples need to sit and talk on these minor issues and settle-down things in order to avoid differences.

• The Time Factor

If I have to summarize the success in relationships, I'll only comment on the time factor. What is that particular thing that couples need from each other. The short and simple answer is the time factor. Relationships are not less similar to old British buildings need a regular maintenance to stay on heights for over five hundred years. The key to success in relations is to give time to your partner which decreases differences. In other way, otherwise - there are many chances that a bond may not last for a long.

• The Touch Factor
  

When a child is ill, doctors will tell you that it is proven that a simple, loving touch of a parent can quickly pull the child through a crisis. It is the same for relationships. Playing with your mate's hair, rubbing their hand, a soft kiss on the neck, a soft pat on the leg or giving a gentle back rub will make a huge difference in how your mate responds to you. When was the last time you walked up to your mate for no reason and without saying a word, affectionately placed a kiss on their neck? This is not in a sexual way, but an affectionate way. There is a difference. The next time the two of you are sitting in the car, at the grocery story, or standing in line at the theater, quietly reach over and take their hand. Do not be surprised if you get a strange look of curiosity the first time!.

I have noticed this very closely in my personal life but excuse me, this does not apply in all cases. I never meant this for Middle East and Asia until you have your wife with you or in case - otherwise a date at a silent place ;)

• The Surprise Factor

If you and your mate have scheduled some time for a Friday night dinner, put together a surprise instead. For example, if your mate loves professional wrestling - rarely happens ;), buy some tickets near the front or if they like concerts, purchase the tickets ahead of time, getting the best seats possible. When Friday night comes around, insist on driving and head toward the location where the event is taking place. When asked where you are going, simply answer, "I have a surprise for you. I know you love professional wrestling so I purchased two great seats for tonight's performance," or "I know we had planned on going to dinner, but I wanted to surprise you with something special. I purchased tickets to see one of your
favorite groups in concert." The idea of you getting the tickets for something THEY like and then keeping it as a special surprise will touch the heart!

A unique idea / gift can even bring a great pleasure to feel. Do not limit your surprises to dine-out plans only but give those in regular intervals.

• The Space Factor

As important as it is to spend quality time together, it is equally important to give each other time to do something they like. If your mate loves to fish but you have no desire to bait a hook with little, slimy worms, or if you like to go to the casino but your mate would rather do something different, encourage each other to take time apart. Try establishing a set time for this very purpose, if possible. For example, perhaps you could determine that every other Friday night is "singles" night. This is not a time to date other people, but to enjoy preferred activities. Remember that you have to place trust in your relationship. If you try this and then drill them, to see what they did, whom they were with, and where they went, then the
exercise has failed.

Once back, I heard that when there is too much load of love - it suffocates. Give some space to your couples but make sure that more than required space is not given to them ;) Lolz.

• The Debate Factor
  

If you know that you and your mate have proven differences in opinion on certain subjects, avoid those subjects. As an example, if you are a Republican and your mate is a Democrat, politics should probably be avoided. As the two of you identify new topics that could cause a debate session, stop the conversation before it even gets started.

If there is conflict or interest or opinions and you attempt to debate on it - this may bring differences in the relationship. The best idea is to accept the diversity.

• The Kid Factor

Do not be a prude. There is absolutely no reason why couples at any age cannot get into tickling matches or wrestle on the floor. Do not allow your relationship to grow old and stale. Understand and accept that it is perfectly fine to be silly from time to time. If you have nothing special planned on a Friday night, rent a few games, order in Chinese, plug in the Play Station, and play games.

• The Expectation Factor
  

No matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect. Be careful about putting someone on a pedestal, especially in the early stages of your relationship. Make sure that the expectations you have for your mate and yourself are realistic. There are going to be differences in opinion, and probably some disagreements. Also, do not assume that your mate knows how you feel or what you think about something. When discussing something important to you, ensure that you both understand the same thing. The reality is that neither one of you is going to know exactly what the other one needs. As long as you do not expect
them to read your mind and accept that this is a part of getting to know one another and communicating, you will be fine.

• The Repeat Factor
  

Learn from your mistakes. When something goes wrong and the two of you work through it, do not repeat the same mistake. Rather than dive right back into whatever it was you did or said, think before you act. At first, this will take some discipline but as you see positive results in the relationship, be encouraged that it is working.

• Shall We Continue?
  

Many thanks for heading yourself for an effective relationship. Let me take a break right here. There is allot more for only those who intend to read more about The Naked Bond. If you wish to read the complete copy of The Naked Bond, write me an email and I'll send you the complete version.

Some of the major readings you will find in the complete version. You will not be asked to pay for it.

• Don't Get Married
  
• What Boys Need to Know and Girls are not Aware
  
• What Girls Need to Know and Boys are not Aware
  
• Establish Old Traditions
• Leave the Baggage Behind
• Healthy Romance and Sensuality
• The Privacy Factor
• How to Know the Secret

Regards and Happy Relations!
Zeeshan Sajwani

Email: zeeshan...@gmail.com
MSN:  zeeshan...@hotmail.com
Orkut: Sajwani