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>http://jezebel.com/5946643/reddit-users-attempt-to-shame-sikh-woman-get-righteously-schooled?post=53001675

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Sep 26, 2012 2:20 PM
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Reddit Users Attempt to Shame Sikh Woman, Get Righteously Schooled
Lindy West


A Reddit user going by the handle "european_douchebag" posted a surreptitious photo of a Sikh woman with the caption "i'm not sure what to conclude from this." The user's apparent confusion stems from the fact that the woman—bound by her religion not to cut her hair or alter her body—has an abundance of dark, untrimmed facial hair. The mind of european_douchebag was SO INCREDIBLY BLOWN by the fact that women have hair on their bodies—and, yes, faces—and that some women are bold, self-assured, and pious enough not to cave to western beauty standards (and gender expectations), there was nothing for him to do but post her photo online and wait for the abuse to flood in.

But then something totally lovely and unexpected happened. The woman in the photo responded:

Hey, guys. This is Balpreet Kaur, the girl from the picture. I actually didn't know about this until one of my friends told on facebook. If the OP wanted a picture, they could have just asked and I could have smiled :) However, I'm not embarrased or even humiliated by the attention [negative and positve] that this picture is getting because, it's who I am. Yes, I'm a baptized Sikh woman with facial hair. Yes, I realize that my gender is often confused and I look different than most women. However, baptized Sikhs believe in the sacredness of this body - it is a gift that has been given to us by the Divine Being [which is genderless, actually] and, must keep it intact as a submission to the divine will. Just as a child doesn't reject the gift of his/her parents, Sikhs do not reject the body that has been given to us. By crying 'mine, mine' and changing this body-tool, we are essentially living in ego and creating a seperateness between ourselves and the divinity within us. By transcending societal views of beauty, I believe that I can focus more on my actions. My attitude and thoughts and actions have more value in them than my body because I recognize that this body is just going to become ash in the end, so why fuss about it? When I die, no one is going to remember what I looked like, heck, my kids will forget my voice, and slowly, all physical memory will fade away. However, my impact and legacy will remain: and, by not focusing on the physical beauty, I have time to cultivate those inner virtues and hopefully, focus my life on creating change and progress for this world in any way I can. So, to me, my face isn't important but the smile and the happiness that lie behind the face are. :-) So, if anyone sees me at OSU, please come up and say hello. I appreciate all of the comments here, both positive and less positive because I've gotten a better understanding of myself and others from this. Also, the yoga pants are quite comfortable and the Better Together tshirt is actually from Interfaith Youth Core, an organization that focuses on storytelling and engagement between different faiths. :) I hope this explains everything a bit more, and I apologize for causing such confusion and uttering anything that hurt anyone.

And then, THEN, something even more miraculous happened—the original poster apologized:

I know that this post ISN'T a funny post but I felt the need to apologize to the Sikhs, Balpreet, and anyone else I offended when I posted that picture. Put simply it was stupid. Making fun of people is funny to some but incredibly degrading to the people you're making fun of. It was an incredibly rude, judgmental, and ignorant thing to post.

/r/Funny wasn't the proper place to post this. Maybe /r/racism or /r/douchebagsofreddit or /r/intolerance would have been more appropriate. Reddit shouldn't be about putting people down, but a group of people sending cool, interesting, or funny things. Reddit's been in the news alot lately about a lot of cool things we've done, like a freaking AMA by the president. I'm sorry for being the part of reddit that is intolerant and douchebaggy. This isn't 4chan, or 9gag, or some other stupid website where people post things like I did. It's fucking reddit. Where some pretty amazing stuff has happened.

I've read more about the Sikh faith and it was actually really interesting. It makes a whole lot of sense to work on having a legacy and not worrying about what you look like. I made that post for stupid internet points and I was ignorant.

So reddit I'm sorry for being an asshole and for giving you negative publicity.
Balpreet, I'm sorry for being a closed minded individual. You are a much better person than I am
Sikhs, I'm sorry for insulting your culture and way of life.
Balpreet's faith in what she believes is astounding.

Holy shit, internet, I don't even know you anymore! I never thought something would come out of the seeping necrotic abscess that is Reddit that would actually make my day better, but wow. MY HEART GREW THREE SIZES THIS DAY.

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MemilyTrees yesterday
Serious question: So Sikh men/women aren't allowed to alter their facial/body hair at all? Ever? I feel like I've never seen a Sikh man with a large, Amish style beard, which is why I am confused. Also, this woman's bravery and pride in her religion is really admirable and inspiring. Honestly, I personally couldn't walk out of my house everyday knowing I'd be getting that much undesired attention- due to no will of my own - like she does. I'm in awe.
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16 replies @MemilyTrees
aaronjmobley and 4 more
Reply

"I feel like I've never seen a Sikh man with a large, Amish style beard, which is why I am confused."
Lots of people simply cannot grow those kinds of beards. Even if they never shave, they never get that full, long, bushy beard you're thinking of. This is especially common in darker-skinned people. Similarly, some people's hair (on their heads) stops growing after only 3 or 4 inches of growth. I'm one of these people. I could never shave or cut my hair again, and I would never have a full beard, nor would my hair ever get more than a few inches from my scalp.
goldenrae and 3 more
Reply
Why would a Sikh have an Amish style beard? The Amish follow one specific set of religious rules whereas the Sikh follow another.
AAP-NoEthics and 1 more
Reply
"Honestly, I personally couldn't walk out of my house everyday knowing I'd be getting that much undesired attention- due to no will of my own - like she does." Wow. Are you intending this to be a compliment of some kind? Because it is entirely insulting and demeaning.
stacyinbean and 1 more
Reply
Most I've seen sort of twist the beard up or braid it and tuck it up into their turban (I'm not sure if that's the right word), so you might never even notice it unless you looked closely.
kittybangbang and 1 more
Reply
Most men who adhere to that rule where beards are concerned will 'roll' the beard so it is kind of bound close to their jaw-line, which keeps it nice and neat and out of the way. Others interpret the 'neat and out of the way' rule by meaning that trimming but not shaving the beard is ok.
AlexBMac
Reply

As with any religion, adherents exist on a continuum of conformity and fundamentalism. I grew up in a Sikh neighbourhood and had Sikh friends who adhered to the hair rules and others who did not. There have been several Sikhs elected in Canada, and some adhere and some do not, but they are still Sikhs all.
I won't speak on behalf of a religion of which I'm not an adherent, and I'm fairly critical of religion in general and believe that their tenets and beliefs are up for debate and even mockery. I don't share the view that other's religious beliefs are beyond criticism, especially when they are inserted into the public sphere. More »
jaskaur
Reply

correct. sikh men and women WHO FOLLOW THEIR RELIGION do not remove any hair from the body. beards grow at different rates and to different lengths. some men leave them long and flowing, some tie them or put a net over them to keep them contained. there are tons of options, as long as you don't cut them.
that said, the vast majority of sikhs are not baptized and do not feel the need to follow this tenet, which is kind of sad to me (as a baptized sikh).
St. Snowflake
Reply
I can't answered to "allowed", but I live in an area with a large Sikh community and see lots of men, usually older men, with long, full beards.
informingyouboutpp…
Reply
not all people are religious many sikhs do not have turbans and long beards, some have turbans and no beards. its all their choice. but in our religion those that are baptized have turbans, and beards, basically uncut hair, meaning no trimming , no cutting, no shaving, no waxing
ClariceStarling
Reply
Lot's of Sikhs do not strictly follow these rules. It's not so strictly enforced that they must follow the rules to call themselves Sikhs.