more macatact
effi
Subject: Re: Why Does Matrress Mac Regularly Disrespect The U.S. Flag ?
Date: Saturday, January 18, 2003 4:10 AM
As your post is simply a copy of a Congressional resolution
and is a guide without legal ramigfications to its
infringement your subject line is somewhat shaky; however, as
regards the wonderful 'murican Mattress Mac I do have a
thought or two about him.
Mac is a consumate ass, therefor he is a successful retailer.
His demographic target is the ignorant and more stupid amongst
the human population in East Texas. A rather large potential
clientel actually. He aims for and gets the money from the
likes of people whose conversations fall generally along the
lines of: "Hey Magie Jean! Ya know that bed of Bubba Jrs is
gettin pretty ripe, what with his pissin' in it ever night and
it bein so damn rainy out for that last month or so an hell
he's had it since he wuz 10 or so and now that he's perty near
growed I was thinkin maybe we'd get him a new one fer his
eighteenth birthday. An Wull I saw this here Mattress feller
on the TV and he said if we's all come on down his way he'd
give Bubba an the other younguns free hotdogs and soda pops an
make us a whale of a deal on anything we'd a mind to get.
Looked purty honest and a true 'murican cause he was a wearin
a flag shirt."
<rest of your stuff snipped, i like the following version mo betterer
mysefs, cuzn i jest wroted it)
"he shore got a purdee mouf, wuddya say we go on down thair n see if'n we
kin mebbe lay on some of them thair purdee beds wif him?"
"okay, let's do that, you tell maw an i'm a gonna brush my three teef and
meat ya out at tha car"
"i don't know what it is about that cute little feller, makes me feel like
humpin' "
"me too. he's more fun than a bug zapper next to a FIB dumpster! let's get
on down there"
(imagine them driving on down, much like you do in traffic, only not quite
as bad, and no intersection cameras get 'em]
"hey look at that there!"
"he shore DO got a purdee mouf"
[two wideyeds hear "Are you two finding what you need?" in that i've been
working too long today voice.....which causes them to stare at each other's
eyes and feel close like they do out behind the barn at home]
"uh......uh......uh....uh...uh..."
<big grins on both their faces>
"well, if you do, just let us know"
<more big grins and staring into each other's eyes>
<then after a few minutes>
"did you see him smile at me? i could harldy move i was so excited!"
<quivering in delight|
"me too"
"hey., let's buy a matress so's we can do the woolybugger and rememebr this
night forever!"
"let's"
<and off they prance>