St. Mary's Monastery
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Br. Jerome Leo’s Daily Reflection on the Holy Rule
January 13, May 14,
September 13
Chapter 2: What Kind of Person the Abbess Ought to Be (23-29)
In her teaching the Abbess should always follow the Apostle's formula:
"Reprove, entreat, rebuke" (2 Tim. 4:2); threatening at one time and
coaxing at another as the occasion may require, showing now the stern
countenance of a mistress, now the loving affection of a mother. That is to
say, it is the undisciplined and restless whom she must reprove rather sharply;
it is the obedient, meek and patient whom she must entreat to advance in
virtue; while as for the negligent and disdainful, these we charge her to
rebuke and correct. And let her not shut her eyes to the faults of offenders;
but, since she has the authority, let her cut out those faults by the roots as
soon as they begin to appear, remembering the fate of Heli, the priest of Silo
(1 Kings 2-4). The well-disposed and those of good understanding let her
correct with verbal admonition the first and second time. But bold, hard, proud
and disobedient characters she should curb at the very beginning of their
ill-doing by stripes and other bodily punishments, knowing that it is written,
"the fool is not corrected with words" (Prov. 18:2; 29:19), and
again, "Beat your son with the rod, and you will deliver his soul from
death"(Prov. 23:13-14).
REFLECTION
As our
world grows more populated and less personalist, "One size fits all"
becomes a favorite chant of marketing. We all know that's usually not true, and
it is surely not true of parenting or governing, as St. Benedict points out.
This chapter firmly contradicts the lie of such marketing. We are all
individuals, all treasures with different needs. Generic brand parenting will
not do.
I was a miserable failure at discipline when teaching high school sophomore
English. I am sure it is an experience neither they nor I would like to repeat.
I tried to treat them like college students or adults, a point they had not
reached.
In my naivete, I expected them to respond. When they didn't, matters escalated
between us, but not into anything that did much good. I was terribly at fault:
I didn't see who they were, I gave them what *I* would have liked to have had,
but I was already in my mid-thirties with a lot of life experience.
I wasn't serving their needs, because I didn't know who or what they were, nor,
in that first year, did I even know how to find out! So, like many before me, I
substituted what I would want or need and proclaimed that would fit all. Wrong!
NOT!
Any abbess or parent who wants to try my way, not St. Benedict's, will quickly
find that it is as hard on them as it is on their charges. Much of my year of
high school teaching was horrid and I hated it. Some of my students hated it,
too. It was terrible for both of us at many points. The light that entered in
from time to time, the genuine enjoyment of each other was only a flash that
appeared rarely, and faded soon. I pray for those kids (and for those who
taught me!) every day of my life.
St. Benedict is not only moderate and balanced, he sees the person clearly. He
is a personalist of the first rank. Practice his principles of government
without the checks and balances of this portion and you will be very displeased
with the results. It sometimes takes St. Benedict a while to make his point.
Cut him short before he has, and you will often wind up very sorry. Always let
him finish: the whole is a thing of beauty, but the parts may fall far short of
that.
Our own Abbot Anselm, once wisely commented that most preaching is preaching to
oneself, meaning that we give others what we need to hear. Sadly, I think he's
right. I know I have often done that. Mercifully, God alone can bring good out
of anything, so He can even use our wrong-headedness to bring others to Him. He
can do that with obedience, too. If we give Him a bit less chaos by following St.
Benedict's methods rather than our own, it will be better for all concerned.
To a certain point, some people thrive on a lot of leeway, others do not. Some
people need rigid order, others will wither under that. A superior who is into
super control will soon be left with none but those who need that and a few
conflicted types who can at least endure it.
A superior who is too easy-going can also do harm. Sad is the community where
the only thing will ever get all the horses back into the barn is death, and a
few of them exist. They were produced by mutual efforts of bad government and
bad response.
Br. Jerome Leo Hughes, OSB (RIP)