1 year old tantrums
Christopher Hobbs
has generally been a wonderful baby (once called a "dream baby" by a
daycare provider). Recently, he's started to throw tantrums where
he'll scream as loud as he can and throw himself on the floor or arch
his back really hard. He'll occasionally hit. He's not hitting us,
but if he doesn't want something while he's throwing a fit, he'll slap
it away (bottle, sippy cup, food, toys, whatever).
I'm not entirely sure how to deal with these situations as he doesn't
respond to firm commands like "don't touch" or "stop" when he's in
this tantrum mode and he certainly doesn't respond to soothing talk or
touch. I'm not entirely opposed to spanking, but I'd really like not
to resort to that. I haven't had to do it yet.
He's always been super-easy going, relaxed, and a generally happy
child. This is a definite change in behaviour and it seems like his
temper has just ramped up, so I'm at a loss here.
Thanks!
Noah Gibbs
From: Christopher Hobbs <ch...@altbit.org>
To: HN Parents <hn-pa...@googlegroups.com>
Sent: Wednesday, November 16, 2011 2:26 PM
Subject: 1 year old tantrums
Christopher Hobbs
their crib or playpen), but I worried that this would cause that
location to be a negative place for the child. Thoughts?
Also, what the hell is the deal with Groups top posting by default?
Peter Van Dijck
I'm not entirely sure how to deal with these situations as he doesn't
respond to firm commands like "don't touch" or "stop"
http://petervandijck.com/
Skype id: peterkevandijck
Niels Olson
time out is appropriate if needed. This is him figuring out how the
world interacts with him and trying to manipulate it. My rule of thumb
is time outs last for your age in years. I wish I could put myself in
a 35 minute timeout :-)
Matt Murphy
Michael Sims
> So this is pretty generic, but I figured I'd ask... Our one year old
> has generally been a wonderful baby (once called a "dream baby" by a
> daycare provider). Recently, he's started to throw tantrums where
> he'll scream as loud as he can and throw himself on the floor or arch
> his back really hard. He'll occasionally hit. He's not hitting us,
> but if he doesn't want something while he's throwing a fit, he'll slap
> it away (bottle, sippy cup, food, toys, whatever).
>
> I'm not entirely sure how to deal with these situations as he doesn't
> respond to firm commands like "don't touch" or "stop" when he's in
> this tantrum mode and he certainly doesn't respond to soothing talk or
> touch. I'm not entirely opposed to spanking, but I'd really like not
> to resort to that. I haven't had to do it yet.
Agree with the other answer, basically, "do nothing".
You can't punish a kid under the age of about 18 months to 2 years.
Well, you can, but there's no point - they don't understand. They
don't make the connection between their action and the punishment.
These sorts of fits are basically "I want something and I didn't get
it and I don't know how to get my message across to you idiots". You
can reduce them by trying to show the kid how to communicate with you
- use your words, point to what you want, don't throw things,
whatever. It'll take a while. But during the fit, I'd just let it
go, try to show him that the fit won't get him what he wants.
--
Michael Sims
David Grant
David Grant
Noel Welsh
> I've read some suggestions about putting them in a safe place (such as
> their crib or playpen), but I worried that this would cause that
> location to be a negative place for the child. Thoughts?
It seems you're getting a bit freaked out by tantrums. Don't. They are
normal. As others have said, ignore them. So long as the tantrum isn't
happening at the top of stairs or similar don't move the kid. If they
bonk their head on a table leg it can be a good learning experience.
When I was a young 'un I threw a wobbly in a toy shop. My mum told me
to move so I didn't get hit by the door. So I got up, moved to a clear
patch of floor, and then resumed. Goes to show that a tantrum is
reasonably volitional, at least in older kids.
During normal interaction demonstrate to the kid how to ask for things.
N.
Colin Putney
My daughter is two and a half now and has pretty much stopped the
throwing-herself-on-the-ground tantrums, but she still doesn't deal
well with being told "no." She'll try to scream and cry until she gets
what she wants. I've tried all sorts of responses to that, but the
best—by far—is to just pretend she isn't there. Once she figures out
that she isn't getting under my skin, she stops crying. It's
especially effective in the car.
There's one exception, though. It's rare, but every now and then, she
seems to lose control. She'll get so worked up about something that
the crying will take on a life of it's own, and she'll be crying
because she's upset that she can't stop crying, and scared because she
can't control her emotions. At least that's my theory. It's pretty
obvious when she switches over from "I'm mad" to "I need comforting"
and then it's best to pick her up, give her a hug, tell her it's ok,
and then do something silly to make her laugh.
Colin
Christopher Hobbs
On Nov 17, 2:20 am, David Grant <davidgr...@gmail.com> wrote:
> Seriously, you were considering spanking your kid while he is having a
> tantrum?
suggested it. Spanking is quite common in my family regardless of
age. It's not something I'd like to resort to, but it's something I'm
comfortable doing if necessary. I was brought up under such
conditions (as well as several family members my age) and I don't
believe it affected any of us detrimentally.
However, I don't think that spanking a 1 year old will accomplish
anything.