MVA

HRM Resident

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Nov 30, 2022, 10:18:16 AM11/30/22

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A guy decides he wants to date this girl. He finds out that she's quite
prudish but he's willing to look past that because she's really, really
pretty. After constantly asking her, she finally agrees to go out with
him. One date leads to another and soon they have a steady thing going.
He wants to get physical but she's sticking to her guns. He keeps
asking, she keeps turning him down. One evening, he comes up with a
plan. He's driving them both and starts to speed.

He says, "This car is really fast. For every ten miles I go over the
speed limit, I want you to take something off."

She decides to do it because there's no way the car goes fast enough
that she can get too stripped down. He accelerates to 60. She takes her
shoes off. He kicks it up to 70. There goes her coat. At 80, she removes
her shirt. 90, her skirt. 100, her bra. 110, her panties. She's now
sitting there naked.

The guy then says, "If I go another 20 miles faster, can I touch you?"

No way this car can go that fast, she thinks. "Okay," she replies.

Well, he gets the car to 130, and soon he's getting her off with one
hand and driving with the other. Of course, with all this going on, he's
not watching the road and hears a honk. He looks up and sees he's
drifted into oncoming traffic. He tries to avoid it, but because of the
speed he over-corrects and loses control of the car. The car flies off
the road, down an embankment and slams into a tree. Miraculously,
neither one of them are killed.

The girl somehow manages to climb out of the car. "Are you OK?" she
asks.

"I'm okay!" the guy says. "But I'm stick in here. You need to go get
help!"

"I'm completely naked and my clothes are stuck in the car! I can't go
get help!"

"Please! I can't get out!" He looks around and manages to see one of his
shoes on the ground next to the car. "My shoe is on the ground over
there! Cover yourself down there with that and go get help!"

The girl picks up the shoe, runs up the embankment, covers herself down
there with the shoe and walks back looking for help. Miraculously, an
18-wheel truck happens to be coming that way. The girl holds the shoe
down there with her legs then begins waving her hands over her head to
get the driver's attention. He sees her and pulls over.

He gets out and is shocked when he finally notices that she's completely
naked. "Ah, can I help you?" he asks.

The girl frantically says to him, "Please! Please! I need your help! My
boyfriend is stuck down there and I can't get him out!"

The truck driver looks down there and sees the guy's shoe sticking out
from between the girl's legs. He takes off his hat, rubs his forehead,
and says, "Miss, I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but if he's in
there that far, I'm afraid he's a goner."

--
HRM Resident

James Warren

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Nov 30, 2022, 11:52:10 AM11/30/22

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For some reason that reminds me that
you're so slippery you can slide in and out of an elephant's
cunt without the elephant noticing. :)

HRM Resident

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Nov 30, 2022, 12:56:35 PM11/30/22

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James Warren <jwwar...@gmail.com> writes:

>
> For some reason that reminds me that
> you're so slippery you can slide in and out of an elephant's
> cunt without the elephant noticing. :)

You are being a nasty woman today! :-)

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HRM Resident

James Warren

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Nov 30, 2022, 1:19:02 PM11/30/22

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I try, every day. :)

florence.it

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Nov 30, 2022, 1:38:36 PM11/30/22

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On Wed, 30 Nov 2022 11:18:14 -0400, HRM Resident <hrm...@gmail.com>
wrote:

Leaving out all the smut, fastest I was ever driven was 141 mph on the
Appian Way in Italy, terrifying.

HRM Resident

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Nov 30, 2022, 2:23:19 PM11/30/22

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@florence.it writes:

>
> Leaving out all the smut, fastest I was ever driven was 141 mph on the
> Appian Way in Italy, terrifying.

I didn't notice any "smut," but I have driven at a speed that scared
the crap out of me . . . once. I had a Camaro around age 28-30 and one
Sunday AM on a 100 series highway I decided to see how fast it would go.
I got it to about 130 MPH, and then I started thinking "The last guy(s)
who worked on this. Did they tighten everything?"

That was enough for me . . . back down to 60-70 MPH! Never did it again.

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HRM Resident

HRM Resident

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Nov 30, 2022, 2:24:05 PM11/30/22

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James Warren <jwwar...@gmail.com> writes:

>
> I try, every day. :)
>

You haven't failed us yet! :-)

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HRM Resident

James Warren

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Nov 30, 2022, 2:48:46 PM11/30/22

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On Wednesday, 30 November 2022 at 15:23:19 UTC-4, HRM Resident wrote:
> @florence.it writes:
>
> >
> > Leaving out all the smut, fastest I was ever driven was 141 mph on the
> > Appian Way in Italy, terrifying.

> I didn't notice any "smut," but I have driven at a speed that scared
> the crap out of me . . . once. I had a Camaro around age 28-30 and one
> Sunday AM on a 100 series highway I decided to see how fast it would go.
> I got it to about 130 MPH, and then I started thinking "The last guy(s)
> who worked on this. Did they tighten everything?"

Chickenshit! LB wins! :)

I got to 140 km/h once. :)

florence.it

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Nov 30, 2022, 4:18:31 PM11/30/22

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On Wed, 30 Nov 2022 11:48:45 -0800 (PST), James Warren
<jwwar...@gmail.com> wrote:

>On Wednesday, 30 November 2022 at 15:23:19 UTC-4, HRM Resident wrote:
>> @florence.it writes:
>>
>> >
>> > Leaving out all the smut, fastest I was ever driven was 141 mph on the
>> > Appian Way in Italy, terrifying.
>
>> I didn't notice any "smut," but I have driven at a speed that scared
>> the crap out of me . . . once. I had a Camaro around age 28-30 and one
>> Sunday AM on a 100 series highway I decided to see how fast it would go.
>> I got it to about 130 MPH, and then I started thinking "The last guy(s)
>> who worked on this. Did they tighten everything?"
>
>Chickenshit! LB wins! :)

Have to confess, my eldest grandson has always called me Leadfoot
Granny :)