12/26/25 Grif.Net - Wrapping Paper
b...@grif.net
[Credit to Dave Barry for the original humor. Greatly edited, I am sure, as it floated around the 'net for a decade.]
This is the time of year when we think back to the very first Christmas, when the Three Wise Men went to see baby Jesus, and ``presented unto Him gifts; gold, frankincense, and myrrh.'' These are simple words, but if we analyze them carefully, we discover an important, yet often-overlooked, theological fact: There is no mention of wrapping paper.
If there had been wrapping paper, Matthew would have said so: ``And lo, the gifts WERE inside 600 square cubits of paper.`` And the paper WAS festooned with pictures of Frosty the Snowman.`` And Joseph WAS going to throweth it away, but Mary saideth unto him, she saideth, `Holdeth it! That is nice paper! Saveth it for next year!'`` And Joseph DID rolleth his eyeballs.`` And the baby Jesus WAS more interested in the paper than, for example, the frankincense.''
But these words do not appear in the Bible, which means that the very first Christmas gifts were NOT wrapped. This is because the people giving those gifts had two important characteristics:
1. They were wise.
2. They were men.
If we learned anything from this Christmas, men are not big gift wrappers. Men do not understand the point of putting paper on a gift just so somebody else can tear it off. And no one ever had to wonder which presents men wrap at Christmas. They are the ones that look like enormous spitballs.
My point is that gift-wrapping is one of those skills -- like having babies -- that come more naturally to women than to men.
In conclusion, remember that the important thing is not what you give, or how you wrap it. The important thing, needed for December 26th, is that you save the receipt!
~~
Dr Bob Griffin
Continue steadfastly in prayer
