03/19/07 Grif.Net - Warning Labels
Dr Bob Griffin
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details
inside.
(The shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial soap -- Directions: Use like regular soap.
(And that would be?)
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's just a suggestion.)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- Do not turn upside down.
(Well ... Duh, a bit late, huh!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- Product will be hot after heating.
(And you thought?)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't this save me time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- Do not drive a car or operate machinery
after taking this medication.
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could
just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- Warning: May cause drowsiness.
(I'm taking this because?)
On many brands of Christmas lights -- For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to what?)
On a Japanese food processor -- Not to be used for the other use.
(Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- Instructions: Open packet, eat
nuts.
(Step 3: say what?)
On a child's Superman costume -- Wearing of this garment does not enable you
to fly.
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one)
~~
Dr Bob Griffin, www.grif.net
1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given