10/20/06 Grif.Net - Famous Jewish Comedians
Dr Bob Griffin
Vaudeville days - Shecky Green, Red Buttons, Totie Fields, Milton Berle,
Henny Youngman, et al. I miss their humor. I grew up with Jewish roots and
claim this humor as my legacy! Trust I haven't offended any with some
Jewish humor this week]
A car hit an elderly Jewish man. The paramedic says, "Are you comfortable?"
The man says, "I make a good living."
I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the
airport.
Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won't be reporting it. The thief
spends less than my wife did.
We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
There was a beautiful young woman knocking on my hotel room door all night!
I finally had to let her out.
She was at the beauty shop for two hours. That was only for the estimate.
She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.
The doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so
the doctor gave him another six months.
The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, "Mrs. Cohen, your check came back."
Mrs. Cohen answered, "So did my arthritis!"
Doctor: "You'll live to be 60!"
Patient: "I AM 60!"
Doctor: "See! What did I tell you?"
A doctor held a stethoscope up to a man's chest. The man asks, "Doc, how do
I stand?"
The doctor replies "That's what puzzles me!"
Patient: "I have a ringing in my ears."
Doctor: "Don't answer!"
A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says, "You've been brought here
for drinking."
The drunk says "Okay, let's get started."
A bum asked a Jewish fellow, "Give me $10 till payday."
The Jewish fellow responded, "When's payday?"
The bum said, "I don't know! You're the one that's working!"
Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it.
Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.
~~
Dr Bob, www.grif.net
1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given