The Golden Shower of Santa Claus
Chief Thracian
http://www.hempbc.com/articles/3136.html:
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The Psychedelic Secrets Of Santa Claus
by Dana Larsen (18 Dec, 2003)
Modern Christmas traditions are based on ancient
mushroom-using shamans.
Although most people see Christmas as a Christian
holiday, most of the symbols and icons we associate
with Christmas celebrations are actually derived from
the shamanistic traditions of the tribal peoples of
pre-Christian Northern Europe.
The sacred mushroom of these people was the red and
white amanita muscaria mushroom, also known as "fly
agaric." These mushrooms are now commonly seen in books
of fairy tales, and are usually associated with magic
and fairies. This is because they contain potent
hallucinogenic compounds, and were used by ancient
peoples for insight and transcendental experiences.
Most of the major elements of the modern Christmas
celebration, such as Santa Claus, Christmas trees,
magical reindeer and the giving of gifts, are
originally based upon the traditions surrounding the
harvest and consumption of these most sacred mushrooms.
The world tree
These ancient peoples, including the Lapps of
modern-day Finland, and the Koyak tribes of the central
Russian steppes, believed in the idea of a World Tree.
The World Tree was seen as a kind of cosmic axis, onto
which the planes of the universe are fixed. The roots
of the World Tree stretch down into the underworld, its
trunk is the "middle earth" of everyday existence, and
its branches reach upwards into the heavenly realm.
The amanita muscaria mushrooms grow only under certain
types of trees, mostly firs and evergreens. The
mushroom caps are the fruit of the larger mycelium
beneath the soil which exists in a symbiotic
relationship with the roots of the tree. To ancient
people, these mushrooms were literally "the fruit of
the tree."
The North Star was also considered sacred, since all
other stars in the sky revolved around its fixed point.
They associated this "Pole Star" with the World Tree
and the central axis of the universe. The top of the
World Tree touched the North Star, and the spirit of
the shaman would climb the metaphorical tree, thereby
passing into the realm of the gods. This is the true
meaning of the star on top of the modern Christmas
tree, and also the reason that the super-shaman Santa
makes his home at the North Pole.
Ancient peoples were amazed at how these magical
mushrooms sprang from the earth without any visible
seed. They considered this "virgin birth" to have been
the result of the morning dew, which was seen as the
semen of the deity. The silver tinsel we drape onto our
modern Christmas tree represents this divine fluid.
Reindeer games
The active ingredients of the amanita mushrooms are not
metabolized by the body, and so they remain active in
the urine. In fact, it is safer to drink the urine of
one who has consumed the mushrooms than to eat the
mushrooms directly, as many of the toxic compounds are
processed and eliminated on the first pass through the
body.
It was common practice among ancient people to recycle
the potent effects of the mushroom by drinking each
other's urine. The amanita's ingredients can remain
potent even after six passes through the human body.
Some scholars argue that this is the origin of the
phrase "to get pissed," as this urine-drinking activity
preceded alcohol by thousands of years.
Reindeer were the sacred animals of these semi-nomadic
people, as the reindeer provided food, shelter,
clothing and other necessities. Reindeer are also fond
of eating the amanita mushrooms; they will seek them
out, then prance about while under their influence.
Often the urine of tripped-out reindeer would be
consumed for its psychedelic effects.
This effect goes the other way too, as reindeer also
enjoy the urine of a human, especially one who has
consumed the mushrooms. In fact, reindeer will seek out
human urine to drink, and some tribesmen carry sealskin
containers of their own collected piss, which they use
to attract stray reindeer back into the herd.
The effects of the amanita mushroom usually include
sensations of size distortion and flying. The feeling
of flying could account for the legends of flying
reindeer, and legends of shamanic journeys included
stories of winged reindeer, transporting their riders
up to the highest branches of the World Tree.
Santa Claus, super shaman
Although the modern image of Santa Claus was created at
least in part by the advertising department of
Coca-Cola, in truth his appearance, clothing,
mannerisms and companions all mark him as the
reincarnation of these ancient mushroom-gathering
shamans.
One of the side effects of eating amanita mushrooms is
that the skin and facial features take on a flushed,
ruddy glow. This is why Santa is always shown with
glowing red cheeks and nose. Even Santa's jolly "Ho,
ho, ho!" is the euphoric laugh of one who has indulged
in the magic fungus.
Santa also dresses like a mushroom gatherer. When it
was time to go out and harvest the magical mushrooms,
the ancient shamans would dress much like Santa,
wearing red and white fur-trimmed coats and long black
boots.
These peoples lived in dwellings made of birch and
reindeer hide, called "yurts." Somewhat similar to a
teepee, the yurt's central smokehole is often also used
as an entrance. After gathering the mushrooms from
under the sacred trees where they appeared, the shamans
would fill their sacks and return home. Climbing down
the chimney-entrances, they would share out the
mushroom's gifts with those within.
The amanita mushroom needs to be dried before being
consumed; the drying process reduces the mushroom's
toxicity while increasing its potency. The shaman would
guide the group in stringing the mushrooms and hanging
them around the hearth-fire to dry. This tradition is
echoed in the modern stringing of popcorn and other
items.
The psychedelic journeys taken under the influence of
the amanita were also symbolized by a stick reaching up
through the smokehole in the top of the yurt. The
smokehole was the portal where the spirit of the shaman
exited the physical plane.
Santa's famous magical journey, where his sleigh takes
him around the whole planet in a single night, is
developed from the "heavenly chariot," used by the gods
from whom Santa and other shamanic figures are
descended. The chariot of Odin, Thor and even the
Egyptian god Osiris is now known as the Big Dipper,
which circles around the North Star in a 24-hour
period.
In different versions of the ancient story, the chariot
was pulled by reindeer or horses. As the animals grow
exhausted, their mingled spit and blood falls to the
ground, forming the amanita mushrooms.
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